To feel undermined by MIL

[Shouldwebeworried]

Ok, this may well sound silly but just want some genuine perspective.

I am fairly particular about how I dress my DD (almost 3), as in I don't want her covered in pink and "girly" stuff all the time. I have no objection to some of this but hate the idea that she should always be in pink and butterflies (or whatever) just because she is a girl. I want her to like whatever she likes because she likes it, not because she "ought to" 'cause she's a girl.
MIL appears to be of the complete opposite opinion and despite the fact we never dress DD in a super girly way, continually buys those exact type of clothes for her. E.g today she has given DD a pair of velcro sandals which are pink and glittery "because all little girls love that stuff" !

Also a coat that is pink and a cardi, skirt and hoody that are super pink and frilly and girly she showed me that are for impending birthday.

I am grateful she buys DD stuff (I kmow prob not sounding so right now) and it's very generous however, I do feel that as we never dress DD like this and mine and DH's frequent comments that we don't like the over girly stuff or too much pink that MIL is being a little bit underminey? Like she knows best because she had 2 kids 30 yrs ago ffs. Am I just being over sensitive or would anyone else be peeved?

Oh and she chose her bedroom colours when she was 3. That's more than half a life away.

No my questions are quite simple -

Little girls do generally grow out of pink - clothes bedrooms etc

I have two girls

They see pink as young little girls stuff and they want to grow up - leave pink behind.

So why? Why do they now have the opinion of pink? They don't grow out of any other colour.

Mine weren't princesses - and still would wear pink now. Especially the teen.

*wounldnt wear pink now

Should does your DH/DP have any sisters? I only ask because MIL went through a stage like this and I'm convinced it's because she had 4 boys and no girls (she's implied as much herself) and has been very open about loving 'little girls things'!
I'd go shopping with her and do a bit of pointing out of all the lovely bright colours available for girls that's aren't pink It took a while but mil got there eventually and now goes for all colours.

cody I get it now and some of the answers were already there up thread - hence my interpretation. In a word - marketing. Santa wore green until Coke rebranded him and gender identification by colour only happened a hundred years ago and before that boys wore pink and dresses. Im not getting het up about it though. Dh has a lovely pink shirt.

Exactly so. It's how you treat your girls and boys that matter not some society expectation of behViour and Certainly not clothes or toys.

Relax,let them choose toys/clothes/activities and support them in their choices.

Stop reading the parenting books, don't angst and enjoy them.

Sorry didn't mean that to be patronising as we all angst sometime as parents.

I usually run clothes past my DD first before buying for my GD but at some point I think I would also be guided by what my GD likes to wear. I don't tend to buy really pink, frilly clothes as I think they are impractical when babies are small and getting mobile but tend to go for different colours and leggings/tops as well.

What does your DD say about the pink glittery shoes? She is 3 so presumably starting to show what she likes and dislikes. So long as she is wearing a variety of clothes I don't see what the problem is. If you really dislike them you could send your DD out to play in the garden in them and they will soon get ruined ;)

I'm interested to know why salmon pink and fuschia are deemed the same colour. They aren't.

I think it also depends on your skin tone and hair colour which colours suit you. Sadly there is not a lot of pastel pink around for teenagers - a colour that my DD looks fab in - darks do nothing for her, neither do brights either.