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Original poster

To be annoyed DH knows nothing about female anatomy

396 replies

Sproutieboolaa · 01/05/2016 22:04

DH, to whom I've been married for 15 years, and with whom I've had 3 children, was astonished yesterday when I pointed out that a vulva includes 2 holes. I had to show him a diagram.

Aibu to find this really annoying? I mean I had noticed I did all the childbearing work but he clearly didn't bother to look at a single book or website about pregnancy or even pay attention in all those birth classes. I am still cross.

OP posts:
SweetTeaVodka · 02/05/2016 20:20

Livia, I imagine yours was a mid stream urine test ie you peed into a pot or bottle and the period blood managed to mingle in the stream - can't happen with a catheter specimen as the urine is obtained directly from the urinary tract - that's what makes it more accurate, avoids risk of contaminants (samples can also be contaminated by stuff on the skin).

whois · 02/05/2016 21:01

i have never seen inside my own privates or any other woman's. Why is that strange?

Have you never looked at yourself with a mirror? When you were hitting puberty? After you learnt about anatomy at school?

I honestly can't believe that in a western country women think it's too uninteresting or gross to find out how hey piss and how they bleed. Pathetic.

SmallLegsOrSmallEggs · 02/05/2016 21:16

Looking at yourself in the mirror is not something I enjoy though. Not any bit of me. especially since the stitches got pretty good idea of what is down there but I do not want to go looking at it. Puts me right off sex.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 02/05/2016 21:18

I don't own a mirror, and if I did I certainly wouldn't want to look up my own vadge.

carefreeeee · 02/05/2016 21:53

Erm...the entrance to the urethra is inside the vulva...so technically the pee is coming out of the same hole....just it doesn't enter into the hole until right near the entrance hence not blocked by tampons...so if you look it does look like the pee is coming out of the same hole. That's also why they tell you to pee after sex. If you put a tampon half in half out, the entrance to the urethra would be blocked. At least on most people. And it is very hard to see the entrance to the urethra. That is why it is difficult to catheterise females. So you wouldn't just see it with a mirror - not unless you knew what you were looking for anyway.

Gwenhwyfar · 02/05/2016 21:59

"I don't own a mirror, and if I did I certainly wouldn't want to look up my own vadge."

I generally hate prude-shaming, particularly because I'm very prudish myself but I do find this prudish in a very negative way, as if you think there's something horrible about your own genitals. It's not a healthy attitude in my opinion.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 02/05/2016 22:05

I'm about as far away from being a prude as it is possible to be - I have just never been bothered about what my vadge looks like!

SilverBirchWithout · 02/05/2016 22:14

carefreee you have inadvertently made an interesting point. Is the confusion because some people don't understand the difference between the terms vulva and vagina?

This has come up before on MN were people have indicated the terms are the same thing.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 02/05/2016 22:15

Not for me - I do actually know the difference.

SilverBirchWithout · 02/05/2016 22:21

The reason people cannot pee if they haven't inserted the tampon far enough is because it is closing the urethra's tube not because it is blocking the opening of the urethra. The 2 inch tube from its opening to the bladder is attached to the outside wall of the vagina, so the tampon presses against the tube itself making it hard to pee.

See diagram on RH side:

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Urethra

Lightbulbon · 02/05/2016 22:22

What is being a prude if it isn't disgust at the thought of the sight of your own genitalia?

Imagine a man saying he doesn't want to look at his penis!!

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 02/05/2016 22:23

I'm not disgusted, I'm just not particularly interested in looking at them Grin

Startingover2016 · 02/05/2016 22:59

I have had a look with a mirror from time to time when needs must but never seen my pee hole and I can't exactly see it when I pee. Plus I can't feel the difference between the two holes anyway. I only know the holes exist through anatomical diagrams Confused like the one earlier in the thread.

Gwenhwyfar · 02/05/2016 23:08

Livia, you say you don't have a mirror at all - is it a general dislike of your self? You say you're not interested, but you've commented so much on this thread that you must have some interest in learning about your own body.
I agree though that you probably can't see the urethra very clearly in the mirror anyway, but I think it's interesting to explore why some women have such an aversion to looking at themselves.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 02/05/2016 23:14

No - just that I don't care. I don't need to look at myself.

I have commented because being called stupid and that I was making it up made me feel slightly defensive and I have tried to explain why I wasn't aware, as have plenty of other people on the thread.

EmbraceTheSarcasm · 02/05/2016 23:17

I used the think my pee came out of what is actually my clit. I knew I had a clitorus and a urethra but nevertheless thought the pee came out from a hole in the end part of the clitorus.
I only ever looked in a mirror after the birth of my second child as I was curious to see what this strange new sewn up part of me looked like. And I was shocked to see what I though was an extra hole. Checked in my family health manual and realised it was my urethra. After my vulva settled down the urethra was not at all obvious and I can't see it in a mirror anymore so I'm thinking it must lie just inside the vagina for me anyway.
Biology lessons with their clinical simplified diagrams didn't relate in any way to what I ever felt or could see.
Apologies if I've spelled clitorus wrong, it looks wrong but I've gone blank with it and spellcheck is being coy about any kind of suggestion.

Startingover2016 · 02/05/2016 23:21

Well I can't see it and I can't feel it so I am going to carry on as I was.

Gwenhwyfar · 02/05/2016 23:21

"No - just that I don't care. I don't need to look at myself."

Just not vain at all then? No need to check your hair or makeup or that you haven't got toothpaste on your lips or anything?
I'm not really curious about the not knowing, more about the not caring really. I'm not very good about knowing exactly where my kidneys or my liver are, but it still interests me.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 02/05/2016 23:34

Plenty of things interest me - the human body isn't one of them.

And no - I wash my hair every morning and brush it without a mirror, I don't wear make up and if I have toothpaste on my face I realise when I get to work!

MrsKoala · 02/05/2016 23:38

I knew there were 3 holes from as far as i can remember. However mine are close together and (as others have said) the feeling is that it comes out of pretty much the same place, also depending on your labia it can sort of cover the exit and redirect the wee to trickle past your other hole. I cannot wee with a tampon in without the string getting soaked and then wetting my knickers so if i need to wee i change it. Or if it's just been put in i try to keep it dry by opening my legs as far as possible, leaning really far forward, making sure no other parts of me are obstructing the exit and holding the string tight in the opposite direction. (Far tmi!) It doesn't always work tho.

As for the mirror thing. I never ever looked at myself with a mirror. It never occurred to me to. I'm not disgusted by it, i just don't feel the need to, i know my parts by how they feel. With ds1 i had a 3rd degree tear and the midwife/dr afterwards said 'i'm sure you've had a look with a mirror and it's a really scary sight, but i can assure you it will heal and while it may look slightly different it wont look to bad'. i said 'NO! i hadn't even thought of it? now i'm even more terrified' and it made me much more anxious about it all. All i could worry about up till then was the pain and how it felt, it hadn't crossed my mind to worry about how it looked.

(Altho i am clearly completely uncurious about all things involving my body/health and when i went blind in one eye i went to the hospital a bit concerned and the first thing the dr said to me was 'i'm sure you've googled it and know this is the first sign of MS...' i spluttered 'No, i haven't, i just thought i'd come to the dr for tests' and burst into tears. i don't really think further ahead than my immediate needs and i don't worry about things)

Original poster
Sproutieboolaa · 02/05/2016 23:43

carefreee the vulva is not exactly a hole!

I am completely with the people who find it strange to be so incurious about things.

OP posts:
LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 02/05/2016 23:46

Why is it so difficult to understand that people are interested in different things? No matter how riveting you find the human body, not everyone is really going to be curious about it.

Original poster
Sproutieboolaa · 02/05/2016 23:56

Not knowing basic general knowledge like the general structure of your body seems a bit like not knowing your capital cities or the basic history of your own country or whatever to me. Not really something to be proud of. Finding out you have big holes in your general knowledge could be a prompt to go and read something informative to fill yourself in.

OP posts:
Sparklemummyx0x0x · 02/05/2016 23:59

It can be difficult to find the urethra on a woman, many times failed catheterisation, its so easy to get the wrong hole, even when she is led spread eagled with my face right next to the area. Blush No woman is the same, all depends on hair, size and shape of the labia, fat, even the clitoris, etc. I can understand not noticing it by viewing and yep I guess having a period then having a wee, it will all drain out mixing together if a tampon isn't worn and secure.

LiviaDrusillaAugusta · 03/05/2016 00:02

Wow. Patronising much? Hmm