To be annoyed DH knows nothing about female anatomy

[Sproutieboolaa]

DH, to whom I've been married for 15 years, and with whom I've had 3 children, was astonished yesterday when I pointed out that a vulva includes 2 holes. I had to show him a diagram.

Aibu to find this really annoying? I mean I had noticed I did all the childbearing work but he clearly didn't bother to look at a single book or website about pregnancy or even pay attention in all those birth classes. I am still cross.

Just checked with my 2 dd and was told ofcourse they know and one can feel the difference, the 6 year old cant but she corrected me with the fact that she has four holes

The 3 holes and her mouth. Oh well

My fault for mentioning how many holes a woman has and not being specific to holes down there.

We were educated about periods so we knew we would have them. I don't remember the mechanics as such or how much detail they went into.

I think you could think the urethra comes out of the vagina. If you didn't know.

How did you know you had a vagina, Livia?

Because I know - what an odd question.

Yes cecily i use sanitary towels

So not surprised i learnt the 3 hole thing on my own but still never felt any difference when doing a wee.

As an aside, i never got the lesson on periods late 80s and my mother has never given me the periods talk or the sex talk.

The day i got my period, i was crying in the school toilet thinking i was dying.

Yep, I've often sat on the loo having a wee and thought to myself 'it's amazing I can feel I am not urinating from my vagina'

Or possibly I haven't.

THIS ^^

And...

I think you could think the urethra comes out of the vagina. If you didn't know.

To those of you who are faux shocked, are you like this with everyone who doesn't know something or do you restrict it to human biology?

I don't think its such an odd question, Livia. I first learned I had a vagina when I learned about periods. I did however already just know I had a hole I peed out of, having been doing it since birth. The other way round seems odd to me.

If I had thought about it (and I really hadn't) I would have assumed it was the same hole like a man (as in you pissed out of your vagina)

Why is it such a shock that some people were never told/didn't listen?

My shock is in no way faux. I feel I have entered a parallel universe. I am really sorry you only found out about periods when you started, flirty. It happened to friends of mine in the 60s, so I thought we had moved on by the 80s.

"I definitely was, more than once, in primary school in Ireland in the 90s. Is this a generational thing? I'd like to think everyone under 40 (at least) was taught this in primary school? "

I'm 38. We weren't talked about periods at primary school (80s). We knew about them because our mothers told us and we passed around leaflets. It wasn't broached at school until secondary.

If you thought it was the same hole like a man, how did you imagine a penis would fit in it? I mean, ouch!

Should be 'taught about' not talked above.

My oh used to think the same haha.

I assumed you peed out of your vagina and/or the pee hole was inside that - I hadn't given it conscious thought.

But then I'm obviously far more stupid than you.

I have literally no interest in how my body works. It works (most of the time). Other than wishing I didn't have periods, I don't give it much thought.

I can't wee with a tampon in, don't know why, have to remove it first

Not sure this helps.

I knew the biology, but I am another one who can't feel the differences.

It doesn't seem odd to me, either, that blood seeps uncontrollably and urine doesn't - I also sneeze involuntarily and blow my nose voluntarily, but that doesn't actually mean my nostrils aren't involved in both!

There's obviously quite a big anatomical variation, so I don't think people should patronise others about it all. FWIW I've got a female partner, so you'd think we ought each to know that bit of female anatomy quite well, and yet you don't really notice or think about it, IME. It's not ignorance, necessarily, just natural variations mean some people's anatomical details are more obvious than others'.

I don't think the nose analogy works as it is still the same snot that comes out whether you sneeze or blow.

Well, not to get too revolting about it, but it doesn't really feel like it, does it?! When you do a dainty little sneeze it is not like the horrors of blowing your nose with a chest infection.

So, you could be forgiven for imagining there was something similar going on with pee/blood, couldn't you?

"I have literally no interest in how my body works. It works (most of the time). Other than wishing I didn't have periods, I don't give it much thought."

It's up to you of course, but I find this so strange. Taking an interest in how your body work is taking an interest in your health and taking responsibility for it.

I don't find it strange.

Like my car, I'm only interested if/when it's not working properly.

To date, my body has done exactly what it's supposed to do, when it's supposed to do it.

That's what I always thought Gwenhwyfar, yet I was asked by a doctor exactly how I discovered a lump on my cervix. Possibly only making sure that a tampon hadn't been retained but she was horrified. So much for doctors being unshockable.

I once saw an Obs and Gynae Dr trying to catheterise a patients clitoris. Luckily she was asleep. The Dr wasn't impressed when I told him I felt sorry for his wife!