fucked off

[SurroMummy13]

Every night for the last 15 days my daughter has had barely little sleep. Which meant I've had barely little sleep. We've both been ill and a lot going on otherwise.

For the 15th night she's woken, come to my bed screaming at me, screaming at me that I'm hurting her, never fucking touched her btw, and screaming she wants daddy, screaming over fucking everything.

I lost my rag with her, nearly walked last night (would of if DH was here). And again nearly walked tonight, just wanted to clear my head but he's emotionally blackmailing me not to.

Told me it's not his fault he's not been here, his dad's been dying. It's fuck all to to with his dad dying, he hasn't been here either way, he doesn't know what the fuck has been going on here every night.

Then he started speaking to me like a child. If I was that way inclined I'd have hit him. But I didn't, I just walked away.

Now my daughter doesn't want me, she wants daddy, she looked fucking terrified of me.

I'm tired, emotional and still poorly, had bad news today that a life long dream has gone down the toilet. I snapped. And now he hates me and so does she.

[booklooker]

you're

[fanjoforthemammaries7850]

People tend to look terrified when having night terrors..and are asleep.

[booklooker]

you're more settled

[fanjoforthemammaries7850]

It's really unfair to blame OP for her DD looking scared when having night terrors..whether she is a perfect parent or not.

People should read about them before judging.

[Cocacolaandchocolate]

Op, please call your GP, or health visitor.
They can help you to find out what's going on. And also help you to maybe calm your self. Sounds like you have a lot going on and very little support. Where abouts are you?

My dd2 had night terrors it was so awful and I felt hopeless.
Please get yourself some time to have a walk, or just a relaxing bath etc. X

[hazeyjane]

I'm not blaming Surromummy, but her dd screams at her during the day, saying she hates her and wants her daddy, and she does the same at night, she doesn't say that her dd is asleep or awake in the night, so it may not be night terrors.

It just sounds as though with everything that is going on, that you are overwhelmed, and if there is some way of getting some help (parents? GP??) then this might help with dealing with your dd screaming etc.

Is your dd at nursery/preschool at all? Do you get a break?

[FuckSanta]

Child is at nursery. There's a whole other thread about that.

[SurroMummy13]

Must be the time of day when the nasties show up.

Having a rough time, you've not had a rough time before? Good on ya.

Thank you so much to those who've been kind but I'm not in the mood to be criticised by others thanks. Got enough on my plate than you calling me.

[SurroMummy13]

Me being upset and angry is the reason for my daughters night terrors?

Screw you. Sorry but screw you. Kick a woman when she's down why don't you.

[SurroMummy13]

Walter

So what, you think I'm abusing my daughter?

Can guarantee you wouldn't say that to my face. You've taken it wrong and spun it round to suit what you'd like to believe.

[eatsleephockeyrepeat]

I honestly, honestly think there is something going on here that needs an outside perspective; and not a perspective from here on the internet but someone there to come and speak to your real-life family and get a handle on what's going on. Health visitor, gp, sensible family member??

Something feels not quite... rational. Please don't take offence OP, you sound like an incredibly capable woman under a lot of strain.

[SurroMummy13]

Sensible family member... No, don't think we possess one of those.

[SurroMummy13]

I've requested this thread to be deleted anyway. Thanks for those who haven't judged me.

I'm not a perfect mother. Never claimed to be. But then again who is?. We all have our faults and sometimes we need support or a kind word when we are sinking in shit

Shame that others seem to like throwing more shit in top.

Won't be responding again and hopefully it'll be deleted soon anyways.

Again, thank you to those who've tried to help. Believe it or not, you have.

[BillSykesDog]

OP, you really, really don't sound in a good place at all. Have you got any support at all around you? Friends? Family? I think you need someone with you at the moment. It sounds like you might be having some sort of a crisis. If you don't have anyone who can come to you, could you contact your local MH crisis team? If you don't know who that is if you tell us the area or PM it to me I can find out for you.

[HermioneJeanGranger]

Wow, some people just have to come and be nasty, don't they?

Does it make you feel good to tell someone who's unwell, grieving and clearly incredibly stressed that she's abusing her child when that child is having night terrors, something that's INCREDIBLY common amongst toddlers. Really? I hope none of you have ever lost your temper

Disgusting.

[Cocacolaandchocolate]

Op, you sound like you have just had enough. Keep writing though. Ignore the 'perfect parents' who never ever have a tough time!
I do think you need to seek support though. Please tomorrow ring your GP or/and health visitor

[arethereanyleftatall]

Your h trying to initiate sex with you when you're feeling as you are is utterly unacceptable.

[mathanxiety]

SurroMummy, please don't wait for things to get worse before going to the doctor.

Things are pretty bad right now. Please go. This is more than stress or sleep deprivation.

Get an appointment for your child too, to rule out ear infection or any illness other than the one she has had.

doing everything I can but its never good enough. For him or her,
Please try to remember your DD isn't expecting anything of you. Your H is being an arse but not your child. She is just being a normal child going through a bad patch.

Please don't take it personally even when she has a bad day, cries endlessly, fights, argues, screams, whatever. She is not accusing you of not being good enough.

[SurroMummy13]

Last night, i got the sofa ready, duvet on there, nice and warm, curtains closed. Ready for the middle of the night antics.

And... Nothing...

She slept through!!! Cheeky bugger!. I am glad though. She was still tired when she got up but she went off to nursery ok. Saying she wants to sleep when she gets home. Think we'll go to the park then I'll let her chill for the rest of the day :).

[NeedACleverNN]

Glad you had a better nights rest

Everything looks better the next day when you have had a good sleep

[JerryFerry]

That sounds good OP but what about you? Did you get a decent rest? Can you nap while she is at nursery?

[Itinerary]

Does your GP offer appointments quickly or is there normally a wait of a few weeks? Just wondered if it would help to make an appointment now, so that it's in place if you need it.

[ParisGellar]

Hi, op it sounds terrible but I'm glad you and dd both got some sleep last night. Just a thought, my cousin used to suffer awfully with night terrors until her mum put a fan in her room. She seemed to get them when she was too hot.

[Haudyerwheesht]

You know what? My dad died less than 2 weeks ago. My daughter was ill too and lots of other stuff going on. My dh is far from perfect but if he was behaving like you id be disgusted.

I'm carrying on with life, dh is at work, I'm home with the kids and at college and stuff but I'm still bloody grieving.

You sound at the end of your tether and usually I'd be supportive as I have been severely sleep deprived so many times and maybe I'm being harsh because it's all a bit close to home but Jesus you sound utterly selfish.