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AIBU?

To be going off my husband over his pants?!?

167 replies

Tazzyduffy · 18/04/2016 21:02

We married last year. My husband is great in many ways, but his personal hygiene is putting me off any sort of physical relationship. Basically he seems incapable of properly cleaning his bum (apologies for anyone reading this), but his pants make me ill. A few months ago I tried to sensitively raise the issue and bought lots of toilet wipes for bathroom and there was a brief improvement, but it's started again and now he is hiding dirty pants eg in sports bag. This may sound silly but it actually is putting me totally off him. To me it's just pure laziness and total lack of cleanliness..... Am I being unreasonable!

OP posts:

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BennyTheBall · 18/04/2016 22:23

Could he shower after taking a shit? Use a bidet? Jump in the bath and use the hand shower thing in there?

Why does it not worry him?

ElderlyKoreanLady · 18/04/2016 22:24

My ex had terrible oral hygiene too. Only once he got comfortable of course. It became a big issue between us.

I managed to get him to remove his tongue bar that always had scum around it but he still only brushed his teeth once a day for about 30 seconds and didn't clean his tongue or floss.

I'm so extremely glad I'm not still having to deal with someone with such poor personal hygiene.

BettyBleue · 18/04/2016 22:27

Yuk that's gross! Glad you got rid of him.

BennyTheBall · 18/04/2016 22:28

Argh. Tongue bar scum! This thread is revolting!

gamerchick · 18/04/2016 22:28

Does he actually know how to wipe properly? There are some strange people who seem to think reaching under between the legs and pushing the paper actually gets them clean.

peggyundercrackers · 18/04/2016 22:28

Total passion killer and for me it would be a relationship killer, I couldn't live with anyone who did that, it's just lazy.

leelu66 · 18/04/2016 22:29

Yeah irritable bowl and excess wind is not an excuse I'm afraid. All the more reason to wash.

He has just got used to it and expects you to do the same.

BennyTheBall · 18/04/2016 22:30

I always take the piss out of my dh because he does so much bottom scrubbing on the loo. Never again!

QuestionableMouse · 18/04/2016 22:31

Yanbu to find this gross. Yabu to bin his pants. Why can't you get him to chuck them in the washer?

NoahVale · 18/04/2016 22:34

he has irritable bowel and a lot of wind?
so is it not that he is not wiping but that he has leakage?

NoahVale · 18/04/2016 22:35

and a bidet installed?

ElderlyKoreanLady · 18/04/2016 22:35

I'd bin them. Not because I'd have huge issues with them going in the washing machine (I have a toddler...the machine has seen worse) but because he was hiding shitty surprises for me to find rather than putting them in the washer or, God forbid, wiping his arse properly

Catmuffin · 18/04/2016 22:37

Is this the same husband that was leaving poo smears on the bath towels?

flirtygirl · 18/04/2016 22:39

Another week, another shitty husband thread. Never realised there were so many dirty bastards out there until i joined mumsnet.

whatevva · 18/04/2016 22:42

Pelvic floor dysfunction?

Failing to clear that last bit........

Kiwi fruit for breakfast may help

Tazzyduffy · 18/04/2016 22:43

We dont have any towel issues thankfully!

OP posts:

LuluJakey1 · 18/04/2016 22:44

Nope, couldn't live with that. The dirty arse is bad enough but leaving shitty pants in bags and hidden around the place is disgusting. There is no hope.

BettyBleue · 18/04/2016 22:47

My ex once left a smear on a towel

BoatyMcBoat · 18/04/2016 22:51

I think you just have tell him "your dirtyness is putting me off you quite seriously. You need to sort this out properly and permanently or our marriage won't survive".

ClopySow · 18/04/2016 22:54

I had a one night stand with a guy years ago who left a massive skid mark in my bed. That was fucking grim, but at least i never had to see him again.

The occasional skid mark on pants wouldn't really bother me massively. A gym full of secret skiddy pants would.

NoahVale · 18/04/2016 22:55

op you are not very compassionate for a doctor?

Outcomesthebunnyofdeath · 18/04/2016 22:55

Better that then poo crumbs in the bed.

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ElderlyKoreanLady · 18/04/2016 22:56

Compassionate Noah? This is her DH, not a patient. She doesn't have a sexual/romantic interest in her patients that's coming under threat.

LeaLeander · 18/04/2016 23:00

How can people leave marks on towels if they are using the towel AFTER a shower? Are they really actually under the shower and still not cleansing properly? That is grim, grim, grim.

Pinkheart5915 · 18/04/2016 23:01

well I'm not surprised a man that can't wipe his bottom properly doesn't get you going. It really isn't difficult, just lazy.

clopySow I had a one night stand with a guy years ago who left a massive skid mark in my bed. That was fucking grim, but at least i never had to see him again.

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