AIBU to want to stab people who ask "is she sleeping through the night yet?"

[Wizzles]

They don't give a shit if she is or not, they just want to be able to tell me that their little darling is.

Then there's the ones who say things like "he's sleeping through from 7 til 7 with a feed at 1am". Well then he's NOT "sleeping through" then is he?!

Disclaimer: clearly I'm not actually going to stab anyone. I'm just very tired and pissed off.

DS2 is 5 and only began sleeping through (in the human sense) a few months ago. He just doesn't need a normal amount of sleep and even now, given chance will get up at 3am and march in dressed as the White Rabbit with his giant pocket watch.

It's not a contest. Nobody wins awards for how their DCs sleep. Nobody ever got knighted for having them sleep through by 10 weeks old. Unless I'm going to be lauded for it, I won't do it.

My neighbour came over to me at the church and told me his baby was sleeping 27hours a day or other such rubbish. I really REALLY almost punched him.
That was nearly 8 years ago and I still hate that fucker.

I remember DD being about a month old and chatting to neighbour whilst looking and feeling like shit from lack of sleep. She informed me she gave her kids cereal in a bottle from 2 weeks old to get them to sleep through...... They're all late 40s/early 50s but am sure that probably wasn't recommended then either.

Number of hours sleep is high up on that Blue Peter badge wish list. It comes after breastfeeding but above weaning at 4 months.

My friend's baby is sleeping through the night at only 6 weeks. Unfortunately her 2 1/2 year old is up in the night a lot, every night!

My 6mo loves a cuddle and a play in the night, its cos she likes some mummy and me time . There fore no stabbing other people as they are the ones missing out

Cereal in a bottle was recommended 45 years ago - my mother was told by the doctor to start at 2 weeks so my sister would sleep.

Admittedly, I am sure the doctor had an ashtray on his desk while he was saying that.

I'm 37.
I've never slept through the night 😬

I feel your pain, op. I've not had more than one consecutive hour since new year (when he miraculously did nine hours, just to show us he can do it.)

YANBU
but I'm not sure which is worse between "Is DC sleeping through?" or the follow up " Mine didn't until he was 5 yrs old". Nearly punched someone for taking away my hope with that one.
But seeing as my DC didn't sleep through til nearly 6 yrs old can't take high ground

Yep really annoys me. I know that small babies don't really do a lot and people are only trying to show an interest but it comes across as if that's the only thing that's relevant about having a baby. I did drunkenly at a party go on a rant to a friend who was being really smug about her (younger) baby sleeping through about the 4 month sleep regression and teething which was a bit mean but I was very tired! And it's not that I cared - it's great she was getting to sleep, but it was the smugness.

I too hate this question along with the "is he a good baby?" How can a baby be bad?!?!

And my reply to the is he sleeping through q is "we get some sleep, some nights more than others but he's still little" he's nearly 18weeks. He will do it in time, he will Do it in time.... Until then plenty of

And tbh I actually don't really really mind. I'm only doing it once and it's only for now. Part of the experience I suppose lol

YANBU. People who ask a question to pontificate their own agenda are the worlds worst.

I'm a lack of sleep expert. DD woke up every 40 minutes until she was 9 months old.

I almost died of sleep deprivation. I was so tired I almost drove into an articulated lorry at some traffic lights.

DS is 11 weeks, and sleeps for 2.5 hours at a time. It's like Christmas in comparison!

Anyone approaching me asking about him sleeping through can go stab themselves in the eye with a spoon. I'd do it for them, but I'm too tired.

Yanbu my 20 month old still is not even close to sleeping through. I have been wanting to stab alot of people these last 20 months

DD2 woke every 45 minutes from 6 months old to a year old sodding allergies and wasn't much better after that. She'll still wake during the night a few times a week and she's 4 now.

I actually didn't mind the questions, or even the lucky ones who had babies who slept well (DD2 actually slept midnight to 7 at 9 weeks, it was solids that caused the problem). It was smugness that would get me, the assumption that if only I did what they were doing then she'd sleep did they think I hadn't tried?!

I did have one lovely person who said, when I told her what our nights were like "oh my god, how are you still so nice?". And then she bought me coffee. That's how you should treat mums of non sleeping babies

vvviola just ditto to everything that you said.

Only got 40 mins at a time til about 1 yr old but had to go back to work (no choice) at 6mths. I remember driving on the motorway and realising it was completely unsafe. Had to force employer (with legal help) to reduce hours. Just remembering those times still makes me anxious.

But DC is fine and dandy now. Never sleeps past 6.30am but that's fine (groan).

Not sure whether this will make you feel better or worse but my grand-daughter still doesn't "sleep through the night" and she's 7 in July!! She sleeps some of the night but then gets up and into the parent's bed. But she's been a horrendously poor sleeper all through.........

It never stops though does it with babies, if it's not "sleeping through" it's "how many teeth" "is she on solids" "sitting up by herself" "walking round the furniture" "walking" and on it goes - "what grades did she get in her A levels?"

Yes yes yes to the DHs who claim things aren't that bad ... whenever anyone asks us how DS 6.5 weeks is sleeping, he always answers that DS is pretty good and the nights aren't too bad - well I don't know how he can say this when he does absolutely none of the night feeds and isn't the one who is up twice a night!

Oh and also I get really cross when people ask how long DS goes between feeds at night and think that that's how much sleep you get. A childless friend commented that 3 hours sleep at a time wasn't so bad when she'd asked me how often DS needs feeding during the night - ha! No love, because each feed takes up to an hour, resettling him afterwards takes another 30 minutes to an hour, and getting myself back to sleep takes 10/15 mins at best, meaning the longest stretch of sleep I've had in 6 weeks is about 90 minutes.

I hate the 'is he a good baby?' Meaning 'does he sleep?'. He's good on lots of ways but sleeping isn't one.

I agree with some of the PPs, it's not technically the actual asking that makes me stabby, it's the smugness of people who are asking but don't care.
My MIL asks all the time & she's a sweetie - she's just concerned for me. She does often follow it up with random completely stupid suggestions, but bless her, she's only trying to help.

And YES to stabbing those twats who imply it's cos I'm doing something wrong. I am very very happy to listen to any suggestions, but there are ways of suggesting that are nicer & less patronising. And just cos it works with your baby doesn't mean it'll work with mine!

I am curious if anyone else uses white noise? I downloaded an app on my phone because I noticed that whenever I used the hairdryer or hoover my DS fell straight to sleep. Now I switch the app on and he is usually asleep within 3 or 4 minutes. The downside is I have to sleep with it on all night because as soon as it stops he wakes up but I can certainly live with that over being woken up loads. It night not work for everyone as all babies are different but I am so glad I found it as he has slept for much longer personae I started using it. Hope that might help some sleep deprived mamas x

Wait until the add on to the "is s/he sleeping through?" starts as that is when you'll get really stabby.

When I've told people that no, he's not sleeping through the responses have been that "He'll start sleeping through when ......

He drinks more during the day.
When he drops his night feed.
When he starts rolling.
When he cuts his first two teeth.
When he starts crawling.
When he cuts more teeth.
When he starts eating solids.
When he starts walking.
When he starts nursery.
When his canines have come through.
When his molars have come through.

I just say "Oh really?" but actually feel like saying that he'll sleep through when he actually wants to and not before. He's 28 months. Some nights his sleep is good, other nights it is utter shite.

I will however get my revenge when he is 14 by waking him at 3am and shouting 'Up, up now, up" on repeat.