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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

WIBU to just wash the fucking bear?

174 replies

NoCapes · 10/04/2016 14:42

DD has a comfort blanket/bear thing
She has slept with it every night since we took her dummy away, around 11/12 months-ish, she sucks on it so now the poor fucker has no legs and is in a right old state

She also refuses to let me wash him
I have done against her wishes a few times and she has literally sat and watched him spin around the washing machine crying until he came out, then not slept properly for around 3/4 nights afterwards
So I gave up and let her crack on
He hasn't been in the wash for a few years now Blush

Now the issue is- He fucking stinks!
Really really stinks! If the heating has been on and you go in her room you can smell him! It's grim

Now DD has recently turned 5, I asked her if I could wash bear so he was fancy for her birthday - she said no so I didn't
Now I'm changing the bedding today, and DD isn't here, would I be a heartless cow if Bear accidentally got tangled up in the bedding and had a wash?
I fear it's a matter of health and safety at this point?

OP posts:
SoThatHappened · 10/04/2016 17:57

My mum didnt ask by the way or pretend blankie got caught up in the blankets. You wouldnt let her go out dirty or wear dirty clothes.

You just tell her, I'm washing it and that is it.

Mishaps · 10/04/2016 18:02

Here's an idea - make a game of it and get her to wash it herself in a nice bath of soapy suds. She might feel a bit more in control then. I can imagine that watching has dear pal thrashing around in the washing machine is a bit traumatic!

Oops - just seen that someone else has suggested this!

ijustwannadance · 10/04/2016 18:14

She will know.
They always know.

If it's any consolation op, I have a 5yo with a blanket as old as she is that is in a similar state to bear. It's gross because she always sucked the corners. It did have a wash recently but I was nice enough to wait until her cold had gone before I boil washed the shit out of it to get the snot out.Grin Envy

Shemozzle · 10/04/2016 18:15

Washing it with unscented detergent will be less traumatic. Econeggs or Mio Fresh or something.

ijustwannadance · 10/04/2016 18:17
  • I meant I did wash the blanket recently. I shower every day!
StealthPolarBear · 10/04/2016 18:18

Could another toy not take bear aside, sit him down and gently tell him he's a bit whiffy and needs a wash? I know its hard but it's not fair on the my little ponies.

StealthPolarBear · 10/04/2016 18:19

Mystery, dd has a monkey that has been re stuffed. He is now obese with all the ensuing health problems. Think carefully...

LilaTheTiger · 10/04/2016 18:33

She so will notice!

I used to come up with all sorts of excuses to wash the bear... Caught up in washing is good. Also "the dog was sick on him"Blush

RedRainRocks · 10/04/2016 18:37

My mother recently sent the children upstairs to see if there was any washing that needed to go in the machine.

My DD came down with her precious bunny (she's 7 and had it since birth) "she needs a bit of a wash" says my DD and popped the bunny in the machine. It went on a quick wash (the clothes were done again after) and into the tumble drier with bunny. This has never happened before.

I have no advice - I don't think bunny has had 5 washes in its lifetime... I was astounded to say the least and have no idea what prompted it but I'm very glad we now have a fresh smelling bunny !

mix56 · 10/04/2016 19:02

DD's dog/rabbit ugly 2nd hand furry toy, is now 27 ! He is all patched, ears have been pieced back together with various layers of fabric, darned badly almost all over, one eye missing (new puppy got it) he has now travelled the globe.
He has an occasional wash inside a sock .
wish we could have e ceremonial burning

SuperFlyHigh · 10/04/2016 19:05

How about febrezing it?

ijustwannadance · 10/04/2016 19:11

Frebreeze would be no good as the child sucks it.

Hulababy · 10/04/2016 19:18

Don't think DD's monkey has been washed ever - well, maybe once when she was little and it got messed up when she was a little poorly once, but definitely not for the past goodness knows how many years. She has just turned 14y!!! Have to say though, it doesn't smell. It is faded and the stuffing is flat - it looks very worn compared to the much newer one we bought her little cousin when he was born a couple of years ago. But she is pretty opposed to putting it int he washer to fluff it up! Mind, its not harmed her for the best part of 14 years - so why change now???

Infect its older than that - I bought it before she was born and slept with it under my pillow, so that it might have my smell on it for her when she was newborn.

eternalopt · 10/04/2016 19:18

Well OP, did bear survive?

lavenderhoney · 10/04/2016 19:22

Ive always thrown them in the washing machine when the DC aren't about.

Sometimes I've sneaked them out of their beds and done it. 30 min spin, into the dryer and back in an hour, if DC poorly and teddy sticky with Calpol.

Original poster
NoCapes · 10/04/2016 19:24

I have just got home to find that he survived Grin he has been washed and tumble dried and smells much better
He still looks gross well loved though

I've just put the bedding on and Bear back in his usual spot on the bed, I haven't mentioned his washing machine adventure

DD is in the bath and hasn't seen yet, I'll let you all know if she notices

OP posts:
SuperFlyHigh · 10/04/2016 19:24

Have kids always had this attachment to Bears? I suppose so.

I remember once wanting my bear when staying for rare occasion at nanas house, parents drove over with it.

I did have other toys but don't remember them being washed or not.

dementedma · 10/04/2016 19:25

Dd2s blankie is just a scabby,stinking rag. You would throw it in the bin if you found it. She hates having it washed and I have to hand wash it very carefully. She gets my mother to stitch it back together from time to time. It is vile but she still sleeps with it every night. Her boyfriend has to accept it. She is 22!

RunswickBay · 10/04/2016 19:25

Ewwww. Just wash it. You're the adult.

Original poster
NoCapes · 10/04/2016 19:26

Grin at mavis's song
Brilliant

OP posts:
HarrysMummy17 · 10/04/2016 19:29

My ds is the same, he's just 3. He was unsettled last night and wanted me to get in bed with him but the stick of his comforter was making me feel sick!

He went in the washing machine with a lot of scented fabric softener! Then I told ds when he was having his bath that his monkey had been in the bath today too!

He was fine with it! As long as he's got him at bedtime, that's all that matters! Smile

BennyTheBall · 10/04/2016 19:33

5?!!

Just wash it.

Passmethecrisps · 10/04/2016 19:34

My sister had a duvet cover which she used to stick in her eye. It was disgusting. Even when mum washed it she would run it through her hands from corner to corner until she found the right corner to poke in her eye.

My dd has a scabby wee dog I bought for a pound. I have never made an issue of washing them probably from my mum's experience so whatever cucumber my dd has just gets grabbed and shoved in.

I did make the mistake about a year ago of boil waging every single soft toy she had. It was carnage. Never do that op

dementedma · 10/04/2016 19:36

Cucumber????Shock

Passmethecrisps · 10/04/2016 19:38

Jeepers!! She does like cucumber but not for bed.

I cannot think what that should have been. Dd calls her soft toys her chums. Maybe I meant to write chum.