...to want to have been offered some money?

[Blitzburgher]

Just back from dinner at a friend's. Five couples in total, lovely evening. Slightly late because of nipping to the shop for cigarettes for DH on the way there. Texted friend when at shop "There in 15 mins, do you need anything from Waitrose?" just as a pleasantry really. Received reply "Yes - can you get 4 bottles red wine, crisps, dips and bottle vodka". Slightly shocked - was expecting something like 'OMG just run out of milk' or 'forgot the coriander - thank you!'. Bought the stuff for total £55. Arrived at party - shopping gratefully received, no mention of cash. Crisps and dips opened straight away - but there were also loads of other nibbly items like little toasts with parma ham; olives; nuts. Red wine spirited away somewhere never to be seen again. Vodka went into freezer.

Lovely evening - friend's DH is a chef and food was great. Nice to see all couples again. Whole dinner party sitting with my back right up against their full wine rack - wondered slightly why I'd been asked to bring 4 more bottles. Vodka made no appearance. Time came to leave and friend brought me my 'bag for life' from the kitchen. Receipt wasn't in there where the cashier had put it so assumed she'd taken it out and seen how much shopping was. Not a word about the cash. Didn't want to bring it up to save embarrassment so just left. Now slightly annoyed - AIBU?

DH thinks IABU because I'd probably have done that weird British polite thing and refused the cash anyway.

Hey, stinky, since £55 is peanuts to you, can you send me that? I could use some dosh.

Wow people can be nasty.

I apologised for being insensitive. Stop attacking me I was just being honest.

Yes stinky bought property young after shelling shares while still at university. I'm clearly not just a goady bitch I'm also a BTL landlord bitch.

Selling *

calm down imperial, no one here is having a go at xenia

If it's just pocket change to you, I'd be happy to take some, stinky.

I made an insensitive comment then apologised. Stop bullying me it isn't clever or kind I have said sorry

bloody hell stinky is the pm

I agree with you stinky. The OP has already said up thread that she can afford to write off the money.

I apologised for being insensitive. Stop attacking me I was just being honest
Fuck me - you STILL don't get it do you. You weren't just insensitive and apologised....you followed up your initial thoughtlessness with a load more shit AND tried to defend it and continued to insult entire groups of people.

Now, however, we're all super impressed by your business acumen and skills which have changed to suit your story. Well done. You can still fuck off.

Hey, leave off Xenia. She's amazingly supportive of women at work

She's also made some very offensive and unpleasant comments about women who don't. I could use her as an insult, although not in the context of this thread.

Does being nasty to strangers on the Internet - strangers who have apologised for their mistakes - make you feel good snakes?

Even if the OP can afford to lose the money it's still a bit shit of her friend.

I'd be mortified if it were me.

Who's being nasty, Stinky? You were 'just being honest' so surely the rest of us are allowed to just be honest too? The truth hurts sometimes.

'BTL landlord bitch'

Oh stinky you really have arrived

Thing is, there are plenty of people for whom £55 is loads, and plenty of people for whom £55 is not. Both types are as likely to be on mn as the other.
At the point where stinky first posted, all the op had said was that she could afford it, so possibly second category. Aibu is supposed to garner opinions and wwyd's, so stinkys opinion is as valid as anyone else's.

Stinky, saying "but I was just being honest" after apologising kind of cancels out your apology. You're not sorry at all and I still haven't seen you specifically apologise for the incredibly spiteful "get a job" comment.

I earn a lot more than you but I'm still well aware that £55 is a lot more than "peanuts" to most people.

Oh I'm sorry - just being honest

Oh just ignore Marie fucking Antoinette. Hope you get your money back OP.

"I apologised for being insensitive. Stop attacking me I was just being honest."
You're being called on your behaviour 'attacked' because your comments went above and beyond insensitive stinkysnowbear.

In my experience, people who justify what they've said as 'just being honest' know fine well that they've just called a spade a fucking shovel. You repeatedly pooh-pooh'ed a large sum of money as beneath your notice and metaphorically looked down your nose at everyone who pointed out it's actually quite a lot of money. YO
ou were insulting and patronising and you're comment of 'get a job' was absolutely beyond the pale. Your apology seemed insincere.

I suggest you look at the silver lining. You now know what the reaction of a large number of people is to such crass statements. And it was all just words on a screen. Had you behaved like this to people's faces, you may well have been slapped, and not metaphorically. Live and learn stinkysnowbear, live and learn.

Op, hopefully your friend will drop in cash, and just feels embarrassed at the moment.

£55 is a lot of money. I work in the community with family's and for some that's more than what they have to buy food with each week/2weeks

OMG all this squabbling - am I in the playground? I'm still trying to work out how you buy 4 bottles of wine, a bottle of vodka, crisps and dips for £55 from Waitrose? Maybe Tesco or Aldi or Morrisons but Waitrose?

Vodka £15
Crisps and dips £8
Wine £8 each
More than possible.

It's waitrose not fortnum and masons