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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed by "I need a favour but have to ask you face to face"

953 replies

Eastie77 · 06/04/2016 18:35

I think IABU but anyway...it's annoying me.

A relative sent me a text message stating she needs to pop round and ask me for a favour. It has to be this week and she asked when I'm free. I have a really busy week with various bits and bobs arranged for the kids, appointments etc. I replied the only times that are convenient would be this evening or early Saturday morning before we leave on a weekend break with the kids. I asked if she could give me a call to discuss the favour. She just replied "Ok see you Saturday". I asked again re. the call and she said no, she has to ask me face to face.

I hate this cloak and dagger shit. Just tell me what you need! If it's something awkward I'd rather she asked over the phone tbh. She lives about 40mins away on the bus (doesn't drive) and I mentioned we will be leaving early on Saturday and she'll have to get up early to get here. As this didn't dissuade her I'm guessing it's something important but what and why can't she ask over the phone?? I am not close to this relative btw.

I will feel bad if it's something 'serious' but at the moment I'm just pissed off as we will be sitting around waiting for her to get here on Saturday before we have to set off on a longish drive.

Anyway. Rant over.

OP posts:
eatyouwithaspoon · 07/04/2016 11:22

Unless she is a drama lama it must be something really big, money I would say.

TheMaddHugger · 07/04/2016 11:23

Kanga.
If it takes her 40 mins by bus, why can't you drive over to her house at a time to suit you (maybe without pre warning her)? i like it Grin

aginghippy · 07/04/2016 11:34

why can't you drive over to her house at a time to suit you (maybe without pre warning her)?

Because the op has young children to care for, including a bf baby, and has more than enough to do already.

rainbowstardrops · 07/04/2016 11:38

How very intriguing?!!!! Let's hope she responds to the voicemail soon Grin

LifeCrossRoad · 07/04/2016 11:43

More evidence for MLM scheme if you're on maternity leave. Tell her your leaving at 8 am on Saturday and will be running around before that

trulybadlydeeply · 07/04/2016 11:45

I'm all excited and can't wait to hear what the favour is, but i bet it's going to be something really mundane and boring, isn't it Grin

TheMaddHugger · 07/04/2016 11:50

Eastie77

Her Husband fancies you and they want a threesome ?

TheMaddHugger · 07/04/2016 11:51

I know I Know Eastie77

she's the lady that wants certain French skincare and wants YOU to fill a suitcase with it and bring it all back to her

scampimom · 07/04/2016 12:07

Maybe she's a fetishist and wants to lick your face. That's why it needs to be face-to-face. Cannot lick face over phone.

Seems reasonable.

TheMaddHugger · 07/04/2016 12:11

scampimom, sounds reasonable to me Grin

IceBeing · 07/04/2016 12:12

Well I think she is bringing the OP a gift and wants to be there to see the look of adoring gratefulness on the OP's face.

The whole 'favour' business is a cover story.

TheMaddHugger · 07/04/2016 12:24

(((((Hugs)))) You IceBeing.

what a lovely thought

BlueFolly · 07/04/2016 12:36

I think she wants you to sign something.

AliceInUnderpants · 07/04/2016 12:39

Shamelessly place marking.

cozietoesie · 07/04/2016 12:43

I could write the script now. Smile

Original poster
Eastie77 · 07/04/2016 12:49

Her reply to my voicemail attached.

I give up. I told her in the VM Saturday doesn't work, she isn't listening or is being purposefully obstructive.

She won't answer her phone - it goes straight to VM.

I think I'm almost too tired to care, I was up several times with DS and didn't go back to sleep after I posted this morning. Have so much to do before we go on hols. You can turn up Saturday morning Yvonne* and we won't be here. Jog on.

I don't care what the phuck she wants. Even if I can do it I'm going to say NO because she has pissed me off so much.

  • not her real nameGrin
To be annoyed by "I need a favour but have to ask you face to face"
OP posts:
duplodancer · 07/04/2016 12:54

Ok I need to know now too. This would annoy me so so much.

FirstWeTakeManhattan · 07/04/2016 12:55

Wow. I would send a text saying 'you perhaps didn't understand the message, Yvonne but we won't be there*.' Then make sure you're not.

I'm pissed off for you!

TheMaddHugger · 07/04/2016 12:55

Soft (Hugs) Eastie77

right now she isn't worth the time to ponder

rollonthesummer · 07/04/2016 12:56

Actually-that's really rude. Text back now and say sorry but your plans have changed and you're now leaving Friday night.

Her reply would make me say no to any favour she had to ask ever!

Original poster
Eastie77 · 07/04/2016 12:57

Oh and it can't be passport application related. I don't hold a relevant professional post plus we are related.

Unlikely hubby is cheating/up for a threesome. He is 60 if he's a day, poor health. No idea why he lives in Birmingham. Work related allegedly.

She lives mortgage free in a house she bought for £50k in E London that is now worth at least 10x that amount. I really doubt it's money she's after.

I'm certain it's something mundane. This had really riled me!!

OP posts:
AnonymousBird · 07/04/2016 12:58

What Manhattan said!

FunkyPeacock · 07/04/2016 12:58

YANBU - that would really annoy me too!

If she has made a 40 minute bus journey to come and ask you a favour then you are bound to feel uncomfortable saying no to her!

Personally I would text back and explain that you don't want her wasting her time visiting you if it turns out you can't help her out and would prefer it if she asked you over the phone or via an email

rollonthesummer · 07/04/2016 12:58

Are you going to reply?

DinosaursRoar · 07/04/2016 12:59

Oh that is annoying! I would respond - "No, you don't understand, I won't be there on Saturday now. Just tell me what you want or if you won't, assume the answer is no."

Then leave it.