To be annoyed by "I need a favour but have to ask you face to face"

[Eastie77]

I think IABU but anyway...it's annoying me.

A relative sent me a text message stating she needs to pop round and ask me for a favour. It has to be this week and she asked when I'm free. I have a really busy week with various bits and bobs arranged for the kids, appointments etc. I replied the only times that are convenient would be this evening or early Saturday morning before we leave on a weekend break with the kids. I asked if she could give me a call to discuss the favour. She just replied "Ok see you Saturday". I asked again re. the call and she said no, she has to ask me face to face.

I hate this cloak and dagger shit. Just tell me what you need! If it's something awkward I'd rather she asked over the phone tbh. She lives about 40mins away on the bus (doesn't drive) and I mentioned we will be leaving early on Saturday and she'll have to get up early to get here. As this didn't dissuade her I'm guessing it's something important but what and why can't she ask over the phone?? I am not close to this relative btw.

I will feel bad if it's something 'serious' but at the moment I'm just pissed off as we will be sitting around waiting for her to get here on Saturday before we have to set off on a longish drive.

Anyway. Rant over.

Ohhh! I have a friend that does this except its "can you ring me, i need a favour" ASK IT IN THE FUCKING TEXT! Its to put you on the spot so you dont have time to think up a good reason to say no. I usually dont respond to those texts. Either ring me yourself or ask in the text.

You don't need this hanging over your head until Saturday, and possibly delaying your departure. And very probably pissing you off as you set off, be it through 'what a lot of fuss about nothing' or 'well seeing she wanted face-to-face, I'd have slammed the phone down on her far faster than I was able to get her out the door'.

I would call her and say Saturday no longer works, she needs to ask you now over the phone or accept that your answer is no without hearing what the favour is. And maybe leave an hour earlier than planned on Saturday, just in case.

Does she have older dc's?

Do you live in a city or nice tourist location?

She wants you to put someone up is my guess.

Could it be something like "Would you please be my Maid of Honour? I'm getting married!" or "Will you be godmother to the baby I'm expecting?"

She might want to see your reaction/celebrate with you.

I would cancel Saturday morning
If it that important she would tell you .
She'll either make you late or you'll agree to something just to get rid of her
Then whatever is is you'll be mulling it over when you should be enjoying your time away

If I wanted someone's kidney, I'd ask over the phone though, so they'd be able to consider it properly.
It's such an intriguing mystery!

Is she just a bit of a drama llama in general?
And it will be something like can I borrow a particular cake tin for a birthday party in 3 months time. No? That's just my sister then

She wants to stay in your house when you're away?

She wants to stay in your house when you're away?

..starting on Saturday morning.

What a complete pain in the arse to have to see her just as you're about to go away.

Tell her to stop arsing about and just tell you what she wants.

No-one needs to ask you a favour face-to-face

Call her and say Sat won't work and what is it. If she says she needs to see you in person tell her you can't be doing with the unnecessary mysteriousness and it will disincline you to be able to help.

(my money's on Juice Plus)

Its either looking for:
A loan of money
A babysitter
Dog/cat sitter
Lift
Vital organ or
To join you on your weekend break which means she will arrive with bags

The odds of it being anything that benefit you are slim so don't drag it out.

"Hi Mary, change of plan for Saturday so calling no longer suits. Give me a ring to discuss favour this evening, face to face does not suit me this week and really i can't possible see the need"

Even my relative, who turns everything into a massive drama, managed to ask me if I'd be a godmother over the phone.

Harder to turn someone down face to face. I'd ask her to text the favour now.

Yanbu, people needing favours don't get to dictate the terms. No discussion by phone=no favour.

You must update us on Saturday OP. I'm intrigued.

I'm curious too!

I was asked to be a godmother by text. Good thing too, as I blubbed unbecomingly.

Hope it's a good favour and not Forever Pyramid-ing.

just call her and say that youre not going to be able to see her in person before you go, so can she say what it is

Whatever it is, she needs to ask you over the phone. Now. We can't wait until Saturday to find out what it is and neither can you!

I'm another for request to stay in your house or a lift to where you're going or somewhere on way!

I would put her off without hesitation.

'Sorry, can't make Saturday now (don't say you're leaving earlier, she'll offer to come round to wake you). Give me a call if you want to chat about something, otherwise we'll have to catch up some other time. '

If it was serious, she'd give you a clue or just tell you over the 'phone.

I would find her approach really, really irritating.

Does she usually ask big favour or could it be a nice surprise? Would she want to ask you to be bridesmaid/godmother/your dcs to be flower girl or something along those lines? Or does she have some good news that she wants to tell you in person?

Has she got facetime/skype?

I think it's likely she will ask you for money.