To be annoyed by "I need a favour but have to ask you face to face"

[Eastie77]

I think IABU but anyway...it's annoying me.

A relative sent me a text message stating she needs to pop round and ask me for a favour. It has to be this week and she asked when I'm free. I have a really busy week with various bits and bobs arranged for the kids, appointments etc. I replied the only times that are convenient would be this evening or early Saturday morning before we leave on a weekend break with the kids. I asked if she could give me a call to discuss the favour. She just replied "Ok see you Saturday". I asked again re. the call and she said no, she has to ask me face to face.

I hate this cloak and dagger shit. Just tell me what you need! If it's something awkward I'd rather she asked over the phone tbh. She lives about 40mins away on the bus (doesn't drive) and I mentioned we will be leaving early on Saturday and she'll have to get up early to get here. As this didn't dissuade her I'm guessing it's something important but what and why can't she ask over the phone?? I am not close to this relative btw.

I will feel bad if it's something 'serious' but at the moment I'm just pissed off as we will be sitting around waiting for her to get here on Saturday before we have to set off on a longish drive.

Anyway. Rant over.

Only 10 and a half hours to go until we find out...

I don't get the posters who tell Op to cancel her visit - we won't find out what she wanted then! She is obviously NOT going to tell OP on the phone after several requests from OP made already. I think it's either something very personal to do with her H (maybe they are about to divorce?), or a signature of some kind that can only be done in person - maybe a loan to do with her H's poor health, for a private op maybe.
It could be also something medical in which case not unreasonable to want to say in person. Give her a chance!
It's surely better that it's 10,30pm today rather then waiting ti Sat or next week! we'll all know! And in London it's absolutely normal to travel by bus after 10pm or to visit briefly late if something is urgent (sounds like it is).

It seems to be time restricted....she needs an answer before you go. Why?? It's not like you can do anything, as you will be away, so she must need your ok before SHE does something. Booking something or someone maybe??

I would be leaving her a vm saying look I am really not sure what's going on please can you phone me and let me know why it's so urgent. Ai am worried you're unwell. 10.30 pm is too late for us for visitors and if it's something bad I would rather have the opportunity to speak to you when I am awake and alert! No one can argue you've been rude if you continue to show concern for her but it also allows you to be firm.

and it could be urgent precisely because they are going on holiday and she needs this for next week (I do think it's most likely to be financial really).

Also put on detective hat it must be in person, so I'm thinking a signature. A contract? Omg....would it be time share??

Do you think it could be something like she has a terminal illness so wants to tell you in person?

Placemarking!

Please could somebody re post the message saying she wants to come over at 10.30 tonight?

All I can see are posts talking about 10.30 but not the post with relative's message

I think a signature too. What else could it be?!

I think she wants you to witness her signature for her will.
Althouhh why that cannot be explained over the phone and then signed in person I do not know.

OP, in the absence of tragic news (unlikely it seems), Yvonne is being utterly dismissive of your time and circumstances. It would annoy me greatly.

'Look, 10.30 p.m. is way too late for us. We have a baby, and we're going away early the next morning. We will be bed before 10.30 p.m. If you really must tell me face to face then it will have to be sometime next week now. As you know, I have tried to call you to chat about it, but you haven't answered the phone.'

This is way blunter than I would usually be, but she really is hell-bent on ignoring you.

I really need to know what's going on now! Keep looking on my breaks at work to see if there is any update!

I've got a friend who does stuff like this and it's always to do with needing me at a crap social event.

But in auntie Yvonne's case I'm plumping for something financial.

Place marking

I justify my place marking by the fact that I did actually read 19 pages worth to get her.

Am abnormally invested in this, must get a life.

Shamelessly place marking

Here FFS. Not her. Although Eastie77 may get her by 1035pm. With a trestle table leg.

NRTHT so don't know if someone has suggested already, when she has asked you the favour saying you will get back to her when you next meet up in 2 weeks time to give her your decision. After all these things need to be done face to face and you need thinking time.

I've just read this whole thread whilst avoiding some work. It's going to end in a huge anticlimax, isn't it?

Please please please please could somebody re post what Yvonne wrote about coming at 10.30?

I can't see that message only the reply from OP

Shamelessly place marking

How odd!

I am genuinely baffled by what it is that she wants, that is so important it warrants a visit to you at 10:30 at night!

I realise it might be something that she feels would be better said face-to-face, but it's still bloody rude to do this whole cloak and dagger routine, whilst expecting OP to blindly sit there and make herself available - when it's actually pretty inconvenient. In those circumstances, I would expect a bit of context - e.g. Sorry it's really urgent and I need to speak to you, but not bad news please don't worry - or something similar.

You need to let her come round just to let us know what it is!