to ask party attendees to bring a pack lunch?

[cakedup]

Taking DS (11) and five of his friends out for the day for his birthday. We will be taking public transport (1 hour journey) and when we get to the venue, the kids will be taking part in an activity lasting 3 hours - similar to paint-balling. Then we will have the birthday tea before heading home.

Originally, my mum was supposed to come but is not well. This means I will have to carry all the party food including the cake myself. I was discussing with a friend about how much I need to bring and how best to carry it etc. and she thought it was perfectly reasonable to ask everyone to bring a throwaway pack lunch to eat on the journey there. This would give me less to carry and would also ensure the kids get a lunch they will definitely like and eat. I would only then have to provide the birthday tea.

But I feel VERY rude asking the parents to provide a pack lunch for a birthday party! WIBU to ask this? How would you feel if you were asked?

Not unreasonable. We are all parents. I am sure your friends will understand. Maybe buy sandwiches etc and find a park to eat on route? Or go earlier so you get to venue by lunchtime if they have a place to eat? Or get each kid to carry their own lunch that you have made? I am sure everyone here has suggested all of these but I can't be bothered reading everyone's response :D

You sound like a very thoughtful who wants the day to be as special as poss without upsetting anyone.If you're providing a lovely tea YANBU or rude to ask for child to provide a small lunch for themselves in rucksack, explain you're a person down for carrying stuff.I wouldn't blink an eye I'd just be greatful that my child was going on a great mini adventure

There is a compromise here.

You could make sandwiches (sliced bread 1 round each). Ask the parents if there is anything they cannot eat beforehand - hopefully there is not much. Make plain cheese and plain ham / chicken give 1 half of sandwich of each, unless they cannot eat either. Then an apple and maybe small bag of crisps and a bottle of water (similar to school packed lunches).

Tell the children to bring rucksacks they can carry their lunch in.

But tbh I wouldn't think any less of you if you said they needed to bring a lunch. People hold all sorts of events for older DC's birthdays - I always feel a bit out of the loop as they grow older and 'the done thing' changes. So we end up doing similar to other people, quite often, but that is no good if you are the first to do one type of celebration.

They are mainly older children who are used to carrying stuff for school

I would make all a cheeee and ham sandwich - crisps - chocolate bar apple and drink and put in carrier bags. Let them all carry own lunch in a bag and eat it on the train then rubbish in carrier bags and put in bin as get off the train

On the other hand I would have no problem supplying a packed lunch for a child as you are taking them out all day

Have fun :)