Is having overweight kids child abuse?

[Mummyme1987]

A friend posted on Fb that parents with fat kids are child abusers. Except for kids with medical problems. It started with comments on how it's awful that there's a generous fit section in clothes shops. I'm shocked that people think this. I think the majority of parents don't just feed their kids crap, and some kids are bigger than others, and unless it is a very extreme case it's not child abuse. Thoughts?

[fascicle]

katenka
it shows it can be regarded as abuse by the authorities. Which is what everyone has been saying.

This thread is not about whether a tiny number of morbidly obese children taken into care each year constitutes abuse on the part of the parents. The discussion is much more general than that. The OP used the term overweight rather than obese in her title, so I think we can assume she wasn't just talking about extreme, life threatening cases of obesity.

[HelenaDove]

" who'd want to have sex with that, women"



Aye Amarok A PP said the same about Tess Holliday Why is one ok to say and not the other?

Ive never felt the need to shame anyone for their size big or small.

And losing weight as a social housing tenant has been a struggle. Every time i wait in for the gas safety check its an all day call and i cant cook anything because the boiler is next to the cooker. I ring them up and ask for an estimated time and they refuse to give it "Cant you just order a takeaway" one of the idiots at the call centre once said to me.

Really? After ive lost all this weight and not touched takeaways for years im now expected to eat one for someone elses convenience? And these gas safety checks ....they NEVER turn up first time There is always at least 2 no shows first.
Basically people lower down the socio economic scale are castigated for being overweight but the minute a healthy eating regime a person adopts means that someone else has to adapt a bit and not fuck that person about its "oh cant you order a takeaway.......well no i fucking cant.


And my DH has severe emphysema due to smoking so there is a lot of guff being talked about on this thread with regards to that too.

[HelenaDove]

And this is the same HA that has been promoting excersise and healthy eating on their twitter feed, Hypocrites.

[Lurkedforever1]

how yeah, actually you're right. Let's not mention to the parent of an overweight child that their child is overweight because it might upset them and be counter productive. When their 5yr old looks like one of the 3 graces, minus the facial/ shoulders definition, we'll tell them it's just fine, and the slim and healthy kids are too skinny. And when by age 20 they look nothing like the 3 graces with a high body fat % we'll also say they are just fine.

[shebird]

This documentary by an American scientist and childhood obesity expert goes a long way to explain how and why obesity has become such an epidemic. Some of you may have seen this before, it is long but worth a watch.
m.youtube.com/watch?v=dBnniua6-oM

[HowBadIsThisPlease]

Lurked, you don't have to tell me anything you don't want to, of course, but I can't help wondering about your qualifications even more now you are being so irrational and defensive about the fact that I disagree with you about emotions and the psychology of overeating.

[ImNotThatGirl]

People make too many excuses. This thread is littered with them. The bottom line is, we need to take some personal responsibility. I was obese, lost nearly 5 stone to a normal weight but have gained just under a stone recently. I do actually have a valid excuse; steroids which bloated me up and a physical disability but there are plenty of things I can do. People need to stop focusing on what they can't do, when there is plenty you can do. It's really hard and takes a lot of effort and time and emotional energy.

[lankylad90]

I give my eldest 4 sausage suppers a week, she's really greasy skin but it speeds up the process of throwing her Pyjamas on after school. That's not child abuse its efficiency.

On a side note what's the 99p 20 pack of frozen sausages like from Iceland? #recession

[AnotherEffingOrangeRevel]

Just reading back some of this thread and realising that some elements of it remind me of when certain members of older generations think the reason 20- and 30-somethings can't get on the housing ladder is because they're lazy and sometimes buy ready-made coffees. No, it's because the whole economic and social climate has changed since you bought your nice 3-bed semi. It's rather the same with having overweight kids - it's just much harder in the current climate (other things are easier, of course). We love to attribute our perceived successes to our own excellent doings, but the truth of the matter is that if you have kids in the healthy weight range, this is down to so many complex and unexplained factors that we might as well say it's largely luck.

[HelenaDove]

ImNotthatGirl im sorry you are ill.

I have already decided i will not take steroids if i become ill because ive worked too hard. and if the NHS is so bloody invested in ppl not being overweight they can damn well put their money where their mouth is and find another way especially after all the work ive put in They cant have it both ways

I wont take hormonal contraception either. I am doing everything i can to keep my weight down which includes not ingesting these 2 items If im ever prescribed anything which says "may cause weight gain" on it it gets flushed down the toilet or handed in to a chemist to be destroyed

[ImNotThatGirl]

Helena steroids are cheap, they work quickly, so I see why they are prescribed. There are desperately needed in many cases but in my case, expensive drugs are more effective and safer. I'm on them now but I had to fight. Ridiculous! What's even more ridiculous is that my consultant had a go at me about my weight whilst signing off another prednisolone 'script. For those who don't know; steroids can make you very emotional. I let rip at her. The next time I was in the clinic, I had been approved for my £12k a year injections.

[HelenaDove]

If the NHS is so gung ho about ppl being overweight why prescribe drugs that cause weight gain.


Its just like my HA really. Happy to preach about weight loss as long as its not something that inconveniences them or they have to put their money where their mouth is Blatant hypocrisy

[HelenaDove]

Not that Girl im glad you let rip at her. What a fucking hypocrite. You shouldnt have had to fight while being ill just to get what was best for you and for them to put their money where their mouth is Disgusting!

[HelenaDove]

What that consultant is/was doing is mentally abusive.


Id have considered going to the press

[HowBadIsThisPlease]

yep medications have a lot to do with it: hormonal contraception and antidepressants can be very difficult to maintain weight on.

(Ok children tend not to be on these - though they may be)

I think a gingernut is about 40kcal. A Starbucks muffin is going to be around 350 kcal. there is almost an order of magnitude difference in changing habits around a conventional bite to eat with a hot drink. (I know people on low incomes tend not to hang around in Starbucks drinking coffee and eating muffins, but I am talking about habits, conventions, the world we live in, the things we see as normal).

Isn't a bit silly to just deny that millions of big changes in the world are going to have lots of knock on effects on the people who live in it?

If your 13 year old wants to have a muffin like everyone else, it's hard to be the Elsie who's just having a gingernut, or something embarrassing and homemade. (Apologies if your name is Elsie)

[Lurkedforever1]

howbad it says a lot about you that you've leaped to the conclusion telling a parent they are over feeding their kids will have the same negative effect as telling someone with an eating disorder that they are over eating.

[shebird]

If your 13 year old wants to have a muffin like everyone else, it's hard to be the Elsie who's just having a gingernut, or something embarrassing and homemade.

There is a lot of truth in this when it comes to teenagers. They are a marketing persons perfect victims. All I see on DDs social media is photos of Starbucks drinks, Nandos, Dominos and giant waffles and ice creams the size of footballs. These brands have become aspirational for young people in the same fashion brands are. So they are eating to be cool and fit in not because they are actually hungry.

[HelenaDove]

When i was at school back in the 80s a lot of teenage girls took up smoking because nicotine is an appetite suppressant


Must have been a ballache for the teachers having to go on smoking patrol.

[HelenaDove]

My DNieces social media is Hannibal Star Wars Daredevil Avengers etc and feminism Shes 21

[fascicle]

AnotherEffingOrangeRevel
We love to attribute our perceived successes to our own excellent doings, but the truth of the matter is that if you have kids in the healthy weight range, this is down to so many complex and unexplained factors that we might as well say it's largely luck.

There's definitely some luck and privilege involved and there are no guarantees that a slim child will stay that way, which is why it's in everybody's interest to make changes to the obesogenic environment in which we live. Any of us can become overweight.

shebird
I've started watching Robert Lustig's talk and it looks interesting. (According to an article in the Guardian, Lustig is by his own admission 45 lbs overweight. If that doesn't say something about the complexity of this issue, I'm not sure what does.)

[BabyGanoush]

Luck?

Why fies tge amount of "unlucky" people keep growing then?

You say luck, I say lots of possibly unpopular and boring decisions (no more biscuits, you can have an apple etc.)and lots of saying "no.

[shebird]

HelenaDove Your DNiece sounds great

Unfortunately my DD is a bit younger and her age group are like impressionable sheep at the mercy of these brands. Their social media is a complex mix of posing selfies trying to look as 'fit' as possible and arty pictures of them at Starbucks consuming a days worth of calories in a drink and a cake.

[HelenaDove]

shebird Not having DC myself i didnt realise the mixed messages teens are getting is so bloody bad.


My niece loves her chocolate and cake but seems to burn it off.

[ImNotThatGirl]

I once had a skinny blueberry muffin at Starbucks, thinking it was a healthyish option. It's over 300 calories! Due to my limited physical movement, I maintain my weight on around 1500 calories per day.

[HelenaDove]

An old schoolfriend of mine works at Costa. He cant understand why i havent been in there for years and cant understand why i cant have a "skinny" option.


Its because its over my allowance too and too much sugar.