I was so cross with another car owner today I shoved a bag of dog poo in his car grille

[WhoTheFuckIsSimon]

I probably was bu but it was heat of the moment and it's not like ive damaged his car. It was just gently placed in the plastic fan blade type thing, could be easily pulled out.

He had parked right behind me so that I couldn't open my boot, he was touching my tow bar. Normally I would hang the poo bag on the tow bar till I get home but I couldn't reach it. Couldn't get the dog in the boot. More importantly I couldn't reverse out the space like I was planning to and had to go forwards over a 45degree slope/bank and was worried for a minute the car was going to topple over.

I hope it made his car smell of poo on the way home!

R attitude, you've totally misunderstood. I never said the road was a 45degree incline. I said I had to go over a 45 degree slope/bank. I was parked at the side of a road on a steep verge which angled my car sideways at 45degrees. The actual bit I parked on wasn't quite that steep but as I drove forwards it was.

I did however drive on a 25% incline road today and managed just fine thanks. At least the road signs said 25degrees.....maybe they were talking shit.?

I'm in bed reading this in somebody elses house, and trying to stifle my laughter in case I wake anyone up!

YABU and utterly disgusting.

This was the road in question that I parked by the sides of, can't find a pic of the actual parking space. No bins.

YANBU

There's nothing worse than inconsiderate drivers and it does anger me when it happens, even though I don't imagine I could do what you did, I don't blame you, it was in the heat of the moment and you've obviously thought about it since.

I'd like to have been there when the driver found their 'present'.

I wouldn't do it again. Am just happy my travel sick dog didn't vomit in the car. She is a serial car pucker which is why she's normally confined to the boot.

OP, I doubt the road signs stated 25 degrees. 25% possibly, but not 25 degrees.

Yes, 25%.

The verge was 45 degrees though, felt like james bond driving his car through that narrow alley on two wheels!

simon, i love you.

I dont think you are BU, I had some guy park SO close to my drivers side in a supermarket car park, what makes things worse is on his drivers side the space was free and the one after so why the fuck are you parking so fuking close to me the guy was there and when i said to him why the hell are u so close to me when there is so much space next to u he said 'im leaving in a minute' THATS NOT THE POINT FOOL!

I can't imagine what you expected people to say. 'Well done Simon you've done an amazing thing.' It didn't make it any easier to get out of the position you were in and was just vindictive.

Late to the party, but just read this while feeding poor dd with a temperature and am crying with laughter

So, if you see a car with a bag swinging merrily off the back it's OP.
If you see a car whose driver has a puzzled, slightly nauseated expression and shit dribbling down the grille it's someone who pissed OP off

You weren't unreasonable. The "mechanism" some have referred to (I assume they're talking about the fan) is behind the radiator.

I'd have been tempted to empty the bag onto the bonnet. Bad parking is indicative of being an arsehole and these people should be taught. Never miss a teaching opportunity.

I once parked in front of a gate to a field (ours) to go for a walk. Someone parked behind us completely blocking us in. We were in a 4x4 pick up with a winch (and know how to use it all). My OH and I opened the gate, attached the car to the truck and dragged it far enough into the field for us to be able to drive out. Judging by the ruts, the driver of the other car had quite a time getting out of the field. :)

OP I am going to say YANBU, purely based on the effort you have put in with all your photos and diagrams. You really know how to set the scene!!

Well, OP, you seem fairly certain that YANBU.

Next time I'd be parking slap bang in the middle of that lay by if I were you.

So criminal damage is an appropriate penalty for inconsiderate parking potatoes? ^^

of course not.

where was the criminal damage?

Our field has a 15m long 'drive' up to the gate from a public road. About 5m wide. We parked up near the gate. The other car about 1m behind us. The alternative was to call the police and have the car towed for trespassing. Towing their car out of the way was probably preferable for all concerned.

MamaLazarou. I said in my OP I was probably BU and in another post said I wouldn't do it again.

Can't believe all the outrage at a poo bag on a tow bar. I think it's a genius idea and the outlandish scenarios of how it could cause death and destruction must be for comedy effect surely!

Dog in the boot???

I left this yesterday (my sarcasm surrounding bins clearly missed) and I am still unable to breath reading this...

It's the drawings, the tiny diagrams, the photos, the idea that bags of shit are merrily swinging from side to side on tow-bars all over the country, that somebody somewhere possibly with no clue of mumsnet was sat in a pub saying "so Brian weirdest thing today found a bag of dog shite in my grille, bet it's them kids from number 43..."

I salute the scene setting by the OP!

I've not laughed so much since the mumsnetters husband ate a fatball... Oh please send this to classics! This has to be a classic.

Why have I never thought of hanging it off the tow bar?! Genius! Thank god I will no longer have to have a stinky poo bag in the car. (My dogs eat James Wellbeloved dry food for whoever was wondering)

Blimey, what's wrong with a dog in the boot now? I don't have the parcel shelf down!

She's quite happy in there.....well as happy as she will ever be in a car which I admit isn't very happy. It's an estate car so quite a big boot.

Dog in bout is fun. I'm guessing the poster is for some reason imagining a saloon