To request mumsnet to add a 'polyamorous families' section under parenting?

[whycantwegoonasthree]

There's every other kind of family type, pretty much, and polyamorous families have some unique joys and challenges that it would be nice to share and discuss.

Or maybe we're the last frontier and even MN aren't ready to go there.

Yet.

*Okay, FLUID BONDED?

I am out of here*

I was hoping it was a typo.

That's brave saying you are poly here. The usual suspects will berate you and say it's not acceptable/it's part of a mysogonist dream/you are being lied to or a number of other things to put you down.

People are quick to put down anyone poly. Or try and define what is a complex situation with many different types of relationship.

There are multi sex and same sex poly relationships and it's not always male dominated - but people like to use the male - female - female situation as ammunition against polyamoury as they know they will get much more support here.

Are you using straight as something distinct from heterosexual, Robinson?

Sorry, my last post was in response to CloppySow saying "She's not the OW. She is a consenting partner in an agreed relationship. She stares she is currently mono, but that she may have other partners in the future."

Saying the OP may or may not do something in the future, does not make her PA now.

I might divorce in the future but I'm not a divorcee.

Not that I actually want to divorce my husband ever.

No Maud, I'm not. When I have sex with a man it's not heterosexual sex either. (Not least because a lot of the men I sleep with are also not straight...). Two bisexual people of different genders having sex isn't straight sex for me.

Surely if you are bisexual the individual is bisexual, but the relationship might be a straight one or lesbian one?

If you are not actually in a poly relationship, I wouldn't mention it to the kids. It is unimportant to them and may simply raise fears that things are going to change in their lives, when it may not.

So, if v's count (which mine seems to) and bi = bi-relationships

Is my hetero-marriage to my dh in fact a polybisexual relationship?

You're welcome . what's a metamour?

Finding it funny how people who are not PA are explaining to the OP what a PA relationship is and that she's not in one, even those who admittedly don't know how a PA relationship works.
Surely that works like men explaining to women what it's like to be a woman.
It's clear from what the OP said that she's not simply having sex, the bit on the side or the OW. But if you want to be obtuse about it...
(And I'm not even PA myself)

Genuinely confused how a woman and man having sex together is not straight sex, whatever their sexual orientation.

When I have sex with a man it's not heterosexual sex either.

One dictionary definition of polyamory is 'the practice or condition of participating simultaneously in more than one serious romantic or sexual relationship.'

OP is in a sexual relationship with one partner and a non sexual relationship with another partner.

Well, during the course of my marriage which lasted 36 years before I had to give up on it my husband had two secret wives. They knew about me. I knew nothing about them. My life was actually the script for a book or a movie. You know the kind, when a person is burying her husband and the other family knock at the door.....

Its legal where I live but even before it happened to me I couldn't get my head around polyamorous relationships and its even harder now.

I chose not to call it straight sex, because I'm not straight...it's really not complicated.

Motherkat is in a PA relationship, OP is not.

Surely everyone knows what 'poly' and 'amor' mean?

Seems like identity politics gone mad to me.
Like the teenagers I see who are simply a straight couple but take on all these labels to make them feel special and different.

Ok, so i'm monogamous now, have always been in the past and will be in the future.

That makes me monogamous. I'm currently single, but my preference/choice will be monogamy. Just because i'm not in a relationship, doesn't mean i don't identify as monogamous.

She's had more than one partner in the past, is in a polyamorous relationship currently and probably will have additional partners in the future. She has explained the reasons she doesn't have any additional partners currently. She identifies as polyamorous. That's her call. No-one elses.

Perhaps for the sake of the definition junkies it would be easier to say that I have been polyamorous in the past and while I am not currently polyamorous myself I am in a polyamorous relationship with one person who is currently polyamorous and one other person who has also been polyamorous in the past but is also not currently polyamorous.

But bloody hell that's a mouthful.

Lweji you don't have to be PA to be able to plainly see that the OP simply isn't.

She just has a married boyfriend and describes his wife as a dear friend.

I have absolutely no problem with PA set ups FWIW. This just simply isn't one.

If the OP ever does start a relationship with someone else, she may even find her boyfriend can't handle that and dumps her for another single bit on the side.

It just sounds to me as if you're the ow and he's managed by a lot of smooth talking to get you to pay for his and his wife's lifestyle nd he pops round. Is he married?

have you all done your wills? And does your DC's df know all this as he's presumably not involved and may have to deal with the DC questions when you tell them? And what about Christmas etc?