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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Shoes off house rule

840 replies

BettyBi0 · 02/03/2016 16:11

So we have a shoes off rule in our house. Mainly because of the grubby London streets and dog poo everywhere locally plus a floor licking toddler.

Every time my parents visit I have to ask them to take their shoes off. EVERY Fing TIME! They act like its such a massive imposition.

AIBU or would you just shut up and put up?

OP posts:

RockUnit · 02/03/2016 16:56

And what about other people's sweaty, smelly socks/feet? Keep them in shoes please

FigMango1 · 02/03/2016 16:56

Piper me too! I don't stay over at my friend's place or visit too long because of this. And she has porcelain tiles throughout, so you are sitting there miserable and frozen feet. I didn't realize till recently two other friend couples also limit visits because of this. Would you believe that. One friends Dh has a foot problem and feels conscious and the other has Arthritis and the cold just makes it worse.
Anyway for me carpets can be cleaned, and floors mopped I would rather people feel comfortable at my home.

CalicoBlue · 02/03/2016 16:56

We are a mix here, I always take my shoes off as do the kids, DH will stay in his boots all day. We have no carpet downstairs so it does not really matter.

DH will come downstairs at the weekend with no plans to leave the house and will have put his boots on, I think that is odd!

I would never ask visitors, apart from kids, to take their shoes off. I do tea parties for the elderly, can not imagine having to ask a group of 80 somethings to take their shoes off.

PiperChapstick · 02/03/2016 16:56

How dirty do people think shoes are?! If this country had fields of mud instead of pavements I'd understand, but most people go from home to car to your home

mercifulTehlu · 02/03/2016 16:56

I would take my shoes off in someone's house if they asked me to or if I were wearing visibly muddy boots or shoes. I never ask people to take their shoes off in my house. Sometimes they just do it automatically, or sometimes they ask 'Shall I take my shoes off' and I say 'If you want to, but there's no need'.

People are so precious about a bit of mud on their precious floors. Floors are made to be walked on. Lots of people have dogs and cats, and presumably don't wash their dogs' and cats' feet every time they come into the house. I hoover/mop my floors and I don't lick them, so I'm not bothered.

RockUnit · 02/03/2016 16:58

I agree Piper. We have doormats for the small amount of dust that might be on someone's shoes. Obviously if it's something worse like dog poo or mud then yes, shoes off.

PiperChapstick · 02/03/2016 16:58

Anyway for me carpets can be cleaned, and floors mopped I would rather people feel comfortable at my home.

Snap!

I remember the last thread about this threw up a woman who said if people didn't like taking their shoes off in her home she gave them plastic bags to put over their shoes

RockUnit · 02/03/2016 16:59

Lots of people have dogs and cats, and presumably don't wash their dogs' and cats' feet every time they come into the house.

Or walk all over the kitchen work surfaces...

Katedotness1963 · 02/03/2016 16:59

I hate being told to take my shoes off and we're a shoes off family! I am not stupid, if I see a pile of shoes by the door I can figure it out! I never tell anyone to take their shoes off in our house. Be comfortable!

My sil makes us take our shoes off but she walks around in heels and has completely buggered up their hardwood floor because of it. And she's forever stepping an people's bare feet!

Friends who make you take your shoes off but have some giant, crotch, sniffing dog sitting it's dirty arse on the floor and drooling into your cuppa.

Having to take my shoes off and them watch your cat licking its arse on the kitchen counter, no food for me, thanks!

VulcanWoman · 02/03/2016 17:00

I've got an idea, buy them a pair of slippers each and put them by the door for when they arrive.

specialsubject · 02/03/2016 17:00

we are shoes off if damp or muddy, which they generally are round here - UK, late winter. Urban streets are often filthier; excreta, dirty water and so on.

If someone queries, that's what I say - non-muddy shoes can stay on.

elderly relative that visits is not known for tramping around in mud, but when she comes over she brings her slippers. Not difficult, is it?

I always take my shoes off when I go into someone's house, because I am a mud magnet. I have a pair of indoor-only trainers which I sometimes take if going to stay somewhere.

hedgehogsdontbite · 02/03/2016 17:00

it is the done thing in Scandinavia

Not in my little corner.

BudsBeginingSpringinSight · 02/03/2016 17:00

We do not have a no shoes rule, we are rarely ill, our house is fine, lovely in fact.

I would not ask parents I loved and respected to remove their shoes if they were not comfortable doing so.

We take our shoes off, when its been raining or mucky.

You will not come to harm if out of all your visitors you give your parents a special concession.

I would not insult my parents over a floor. I think they are worth more than the floor

Postchildrenpregranny · 02/03/2016 17:00

Well around barefoot at home but.find it odd to be asked in other people's houses .Obviously if my shoes were muddy I'd offer I do wish my one friend who prefers it would put a chair in her hall.I find it quite hard to put on my knee length zip up boots while standing on one leg

BaronessEllaSaturday · 02/03/2016 17:01

Shoes on house here. Do not try walking on my floors in only socks in winter as you will freeze. I tend to take shoes off in carpeted houses and leave on in houses with solid floors.

Balletgirlmum · 02/03/2016 17:01

I'd just stop visiting.

MustBeThin · 02/03/2016 17:02

I think I must be strange Every time I go to anyone's house I ALWAYS automatically take my shoes off, if I'm wearing shoes that don't need socks I keep a pair of socks in my handbag Every house I went to as a child nobody wore shoes indoors not my school friends or anyone in my massive family. As it's something I've grown up with (I'm now 26) I've never even really thought about it, I thought everyone took their shoes off when visiting people.

hedgehogsdontbite · 02/03/2016 17:03

I bet the Queen keeps her shoes on.

RitaVinTease · 02/03/2016 17:03

YANBU. Carpets are expensive and a hassle to clean, tell them to bring slippers.

Sparklingbrook · 02/03/2016 17:04

If you want to sit on my settee and put your feet up or curl them underneath you it's shoes off. Or is it ok for shoes on the settee too?

ComeonSummer1 · 02/03/2016 17:06

Rock

You always step on something hard and wet?

Is the house in Texas.

AppleSetsSail · 02/03/2016 17:07

I tend to take my shoes off when I come indoors, but that's more for comfort (I put my slippers on). I wouldn't consider asking someone to take their shoes off nor would I really like to take mine off at someone else's house.

It is kind of unwelcoming.

KitKatCustard · 02/03/2016 17:07

piper I don't know where you live (in a city, maybe?) but in this part of the world (and where I lived previously) there are copious amounts of mud.

usual · 02/03/2016 17:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

chibsortig · 02/03/2016 17:09

If you arent removing your shoes then you arent getting past the kitchen.
Shoes are for outside my home is indoors.

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