to thibk there's a lot of mansplaining going on at the moment?

[StealthPolarBear]

On mn I mean. Just something I seem to be spotting more and more.
happy to be told I'm wrong in words of one syllable

Piglet John another one I believe, I don't tend to be on the same threads as hI'm but I know he has specific knowledge and is happy to share it.
Let's make a list of known non mansplainers :) no let's not

And then agonised inwardly whether I had been too aggressive this resonates, although I'm trying really hard to get over it!

I have a real issue with one at work, he interrupts and talks over me in meetings where I am the subject matter expert. Last week someone asked me a question and he answered so I called him on it. I'm going to keep on firmly doing it. And doubtless get a reputation for being one of those unhinged feminist harpies!

No you won't get a reputation as an "unhinged feminist harpy" because you won't have behaved in such a way, you'll have been acting reasonably, as it is reasonable to expect that you don't get interrupted on stuff especially when you are leading the talk/subject matter expert.

Yes Dione agree

Given there are overtly few men on Mn and the few that I have seen are speaking about their area of expertise eg schools admissions, I would have to disagree with you.

Which is another example of being more important than others.
If you haven't seen it, it didn't happen.
Men post around all the time here.
They are mostly nice, but sometimes we do have the odd post that starts with "I'm a man" when there's no need. Or the "sexism doesn't exist" high opinions.

Mansplaining exists as a term because it's mostly men who do it to women. Women don't tend presume men don't know what they're talking about. Or use being a female to give more weight to their opinion.
As such, I wish it was a 50s thing, but it's not in women's hands to make it disappear. It's in men's hands, so whoever said it shouldn't be used, you are preaching to the wrong audience and, importantly and outrageously, you just want women to shut up and not name it.

Not at all lweji. It is entirely in your hands to stop yourself being sexist, I don't see how you can put that responsibility onto anyone else or any group of people other than yourself. I was preaching to the right audience, namely anyone who still thinks a word like mansplaining is an acceptable term to use in the modern world, rather than a highly derogatory term. If someone is speaking down to you or assuming you don't know what you are talking about, then call them out on that, don't be sexist or assume they are only condescending because of their gender. That just makes no sense.

It's a releif to have it mans explained that neither mansplaining nor mysoginistic objectification are real and are just made up by "feminists"

However, back on earth; we didn't invent these concepts and naming them for what they are does not make me a sexist.

The term Mansplaining is used to call out sexism, actually.
It says men are doing it because they are men and they are doing it to women because they are women.
The behaviour is sexist, not the word.
Why should women stop using terms that denounce sexism?

If you are using terms like "mansplaining" then yes sorry to break it to you, you are being sexist. Just look at the word. If a man is talking down to you because he assumes you're an idiot and don't know stuff then he is an idiot for assuming things about strangers. He is not an idiot because he is a man, he would have thought the same thing if he was a woman.

The term calls out for behaviour that men wouldn't have with each other. Things they'd never explain to another man.
It exists.

If a man is talking down to you because he assumes you're an idiot

You'd be right if he assumed that I, as an individual, was an idiot. But not if he assumes I'm an idiot, or wouldn't know, because I'm a woman.

No one should stop using terms that denounce sexism, but the word mansplaining is itself sexist, which is why I think people should stop using it. If you are assuming that the only reason a man talks down to you is because he is a man then that really is some outlandish sexist thinking. A man who talks down to you is a problem to society; not because he is a man, but because he is someone who talks down to people regardless of who they are and because he makes assumptions about strangers. It has nothing to do with who he is. I am ultimately not going to get dragged into a debate with someone who seriously thinks it is still ok to use sexist terms like mansplaining, suffice to say I've made my thoughts on the subject known. It is a disgusting vile word that belongs, which other sexist things, in the 1950's or insert random decade when sexism was at its peak.

Lweji now who is the one assuming things? You automatically assume that if someone talks down to you, it must be because of your gender. No, maybe the person is just an idiot who assumes things. No need to bring his or her gender into it.

So, what do you call men who respect each other's opinions in the workplace and behave as all the women are idiots?

What do you call when a man comes here not simply arrogantly stating his opinion, but adding up and making it very clear he's a man and then state his opinion? When no other pp, including other men, haven't done it?

It should read:
When no other pp, including other men, have done it?

The troubling thing for me is the real denial of this as a phenomenon.
Because it is a denial of what women and girls do experience simply by virtue of being women (or girls).

My fil is a master at it. And I honestly don't think he means to be, it is just ingrained in his conditioning as a wealthy, white man of his years.

insert random decade when sexism was at its peak
2010s?

OOOOH felicity you beat me to it!

This - www.mumsnet.com/Talk/child_internet_safety/a2307274-I-am-everything-you-hate-about-people-on-the-internet-I-am-here-to-help

is mansplaining.

He gets his arse handed to him though.

That was a lovely thread.

What do you call when a man comes here not simply arrogantly stating his opinion, but adding up and making it very clear he's a man and then state his opinion? When no other pp, including other men, haven't done it?

I like the new posters who come to the board and go "HELLO LADIES! I am a man, and I am new here, and I think this site is great and you are all very funny and surprisingly knowledgable about some things. I'm amazed this site is so great! I hope you will welcome me and listen to my anecdotes about fatherhood. Well done on your cool site, ladies! "

In other news, I give up on the idiots who can't RTFT and digest my repeated explanations as to why mansplaining exists. "Don't be sexist!" Well, you don't be sexist first, then we won't have to coin a phrase for your sexist behaviour.

That's not what I was referring to and you either know it and are being disingenuous or can't or won't listen to other people's arguments.

Well done on your cool site, ladies! "

And btw, that is actually Mansplaining.

Why shouldn't the "ladies" have a cool site? Why should we need to be told by a man well done for the site? Does this man go around predominantly male sites and congratulate the "gentlemen" on their cool sites? Saying specifically he is a man to start with?

How is that last bit not sexist?
I rest my case.

chilled manspaining is a simple way of explaining the sexism women and girls face every day, all the time, throughout their lives. You do understand that there is no such thing as reverse sexism, just as reverse racism does not exist?

If we, or at least our daughters, are going to have better lives then we need to start naming the behaviour that is causing the problems.

Thomas, I just read that full thread. Hilarious. I love that he comes back a month later to go "in the interest of full disclosure I WAS CONTACTED BY A JOURNALIST HOW COOL AM I?" What a twat.