to thibk there's a lot of mansplaining going on at the moment?

[StealthPolarBear]

On mn I mean. Just something I seem to be spotting more and more.
happy to be told I'm wrong in words of one syllable

Yes..I have had that too.. People layer on understandings and stick to them. Sometimes this might be because there is fact, and interpretation, eg someone says 'tea of coffee?' And the answer is ' I don't want tea' one person might say 'he said he didn't want tea' and another might say ' he wanted coffee' only the first is fact..the second is interpretation.

People do this all the time, because it helps understanding in most cases, but for example if someone says 'I think that car is expensive' there are many interpretations of what that means, and I have had arguments with both men and women where in that example someone says ' you said you didn't want to hire that car' or 'you said you didn't like that car' only to find that when I say the equivalent of 'no I just said it was expensive' I get the eye roll and the 'you are impossible' and 'I was there I know what you said'

No he didn't Stealth, he just looked incredulous and blustered a bit before walking off. DH was shaking with suppressed laughter because he could see how annoyed I was.

I saw the bloke again at school during the Christmas week (he is one of the Parish Governors) and he didn't even talk to me then...although the Vicar did ask me what my husband thought of the Service and whether it compared favourably to military ones...thankfully he had the grace to apologise when he realised what he'd done.

Oh cars. This is another BIL one.

I don't remember how this conversation started but I said that even if I had all the money in the world I wouldn't buy a Rolls Royce.

BIL said I should because they were the finest piece of engineering automobility known to man.

I said they may be but I didn't like the look of them. If money was no object I'd buy an AC Cobra.

He then droned on about the superior engineering of the RR marque blah blah blah.

At the time I drove a Mini and he drove a Vauxhall Astra.

I think I've been justified in that the average 50 year old Cobra holds its resale value better than the average 50 year old RR.

I can tell you another one about BIL and horses. In fact, I can probably push on through till dawn.

The notion that I'm telling people they are wrong is your flawed interpretation

Stop it, my sides are splitting.

There was an awful lot of mansplaining around when I was a student. You can definitely tell the difference between "I'm going to tell you about blood pressure because I'm a medic and you're a linguist" and "I'm going to tell you about traumatic language loss because I'm a man (albeit a computational linguist) and you're a woman (albeit an applied linguist)".

Cars. Not really mansplaining but when I was younger, my mate's brother pissed himself laughing that I drove a Suzuki Swift. It was my first car, it ran, I didn't give a shit that it wasn't some amazing car. I thought he was a total tool, cackling away.

Reading all of the examples of mansplaining has given me a nasty feeling that it's not 'benevolent' education of tiny women brains but actually acts of aggression against women, who are not welcome where ever it is they are and if they are there, shd just shut up -but preferably disappear. Usually we just have the isolated examples we each posted , but the cumulative effect of these examples plus the increasingly hostile responses of men who will not admit that this happens , and choose instead to degender the behaviour, deny it happens and attack women ,trying to make women responsible for this male behaviour. Is MN being targeted by women haters?

Cant say I've seen it on here too often. Although there was that great thread were some young'un came on to explain t'internet to us old gimmers. Not sure that was because it was a male poster or just a stupid person. He soon got shot down.

I had a very enlightening conversation with a colleague who told me all about sexism in the workplace and how concerned he was about it as a father of daughters. He said 'can you believe that woman don't get treated the same as men'. I'm no Elle Macpherson, but I don't think he could have any doubt I'm a woman.

And LtEve wins the thread.

Crikey.

Now I think of it, just a few mornings ago I was chatting with my boss and a few colleagues before a meeting started. My boss (50, overweight, eats a terrible diet with related health issues and has never seen the inside of a gym), starts talking about another colleague who has started training for his first marathon. My boss starts explaining how tough it is, what's involved how it's hard to stay motivated etc... strangely aiming all this at me (the only female in the room) as if I needed to be informed (?). I replied, yes I know, I've run a marathon every year for the last 10 years. Did that shut my boss up? Of course not, he just kept talking at me explaining everything he knew (was making up) about distance training...

I sometimes struggle with my dh as he can be a bit of a "i require evidence"

But before i read exlteves post out (as i thought it was funny) i told him what manspianing was using the book writing woman as an example

And he said "a lot of men think they are much more intelligent than women i see it all the time"

At last he gets something , ok its because he has seen evidence but still...

Trouble is Rufus they so often reject the evidence even when it is placed before them.

They need to determine if is the right sort of evidence.

Typical example of radio phoning after Our MP alikened Broad Street in Brum to the attacks in Germany against women.

Umpteen women ringing and texting in about being harassed on Broad Street simply for being a woman - middle aged white guy in charge of publicising broad street and surrounding area dismisses it as anecdotal and he'd never seen it or had it reported to him.

Middle aged white guy not harassed by over sexed drunk lads on night out - shocker!

Rainbunny
That sounds like an assertion of dominance doesn't it.
Was he beating his chest at the same time?

Oh no, he didn't beat his chest - he would have left butter stains on his shirt from the buttery toasted bagel he was eating... ;)

The most irritating form of mansplaining is men tend to think that their opinions are objective, based on reason and realism whilst women's are subjective and based on emotion.

Ararmai, it is 90% of the time micro aggression. I doubt they even consciously understand they're doing it. But they do it because they think women are stupid and should just shush and be educated. 8% of the time it's to show off and look all sexy and knowledgeable, and 2% of the time it's because they want to helpfully educate.*

*Statistics are 102% accurate. I did a study and everything.

You posted 5 links in a row to a shit ton of research and expected me to leave the thread, to read it all. That is definitely mansplaining.

No it absolutely is not. That is providing evidence for a point of view you were saying had no basis in fact.
Jeez Louise.

The award for Best Explaination of Mansplaining on The Internet goes to.......

Dadadadaaaaaa

.....Lordbrightside for his "Female Objectification Isn't A Thing" post on a thread about Mansplaining on Mumsnet.

Given there are overtly few men on Mn and the few that I have seen are speaking about their area of expertise eg schools admissions, I would have to disagree with you.

But men do it because they think women as a collective group are too stupid to understand otherwise, or have got it wrong, or are just mixed up in their fluffy little heads. It's prejudice against an entire gender. When women do it, they do it just because they think the other woman (individual) is stupid.

So you are saying that 'men' as opposed to some men do it to women because, collectively, men think that all women are a bit thick.

And you are saying that, collectively, women don't ever do it to men, but some women may very occasionally do it to some women because those individual women are a bit thick.

Good. Glad we've cleared that one up.

DaddyDr

Thank you for mansplaining that to me.

I was unaware that you had a totally different definition of mansplaining than I, a card carrying, although not rad, feminist and other feminists have used for some time.

We will, of course, scurry away with our vaginas between our legs because a man had deigned to tell us we are doing feminism wrong and that now he has shared his manly opinion we have to change our ways, including our vocabulary.

"Mansplaining" is a highly derogatory word that seems to just describe someone being condescending. If they are condescending then call them out on that, no need to come out with outdated sexist nonsense like "mansplaining". Honestly words like that belong in the 1950's.

Sashh
What did I do?? I've not said anything about feminist or any such thing. Where have I done "mansplaning" in this thread?
Think you might have me Confused with another poster.

Yes I think you might be getting tarred with the same brush as Lord b :)
A pp mentioned school admissions. Is phr47 a man? If so then I definitely agree no mansplaining there just a genuine, actual expertise. And I had no idea "she" was a man.