To ask guests to contribute to my wedding?

[DontForgetTheLightAlesLawrence]

Please give your honest thoughts on what you would think to receiving this in a wedding invitation.

Along with saying yes or no to coming, and whether you have any special dietary requirements, it has a bit saying that all drinks on the day/evening will be free, with a small contribution request, on the return of the invitation. Childrend drinks are free so no contribution required: non alcohol drinking adults £5, alcohol drinking adults £10.

Mr RAB and I had said that we would maybe send the Save the Dates out soon, so they arrive around the time of us getting married, then inform people then that we are actually getting married now? The family and friends we did tell the idea to all seemed OK with it. But to "officially" tell everyone? What do you reckon?

Wow finally got to the end!

Ignore those saying no one will come a year after, I think it's a fab idea and I've been to two wedding parties which were quite some time after the initial ceremony.

Think the £1 a drink is a good idea too.

Hope your wedding ceremony goes well!

Someone had actually written a lovey poem on Facebook about a way that we could explain it in the Save the Dates, but I've lost it!

It's in February outside in a barn? Seriously? Given its not a wedding or your birthday or even your anniversary its a bonkers idea. Guests going to a party don't expect to be huddled under blankets whilst sipping champagne.

I like non traditional but this is just a woman wanting her big day with others paying for it but can't actual be bothered to wait so people can actual see the wedding so wants a fake one after.

I agree with autumn her expections of her guests are unrealistic.

Pretty much yea.

Hope not! But only time will tell! I'll come back to you next year when I'm sat in the barn by myself and need someone to talk to. 😂😂

And Mr RAB obviously. Hopefully.

Why has the thread turned into an opportunity to tear apart the whole wedding? Fucking MN sometimes...

Someone had actually written a lovey poem on Facebook about a way that we could explain it in the Save the Dates, but I've lost it!

Poems are not generally well received by, we, anybody.

Good job I lost it then!

I think a barn in February will be fine as long as it's a proper venue that is used for events all year round. I'm confused though - didn't you say people will be camping and that there is a summer fete theme? How's that going to work in winter?

I'd come to your wedding/anniversary party even if I had to pay a tenner. But there is no way on god's earth I'd camp in February

Rab ignore that, the cash poems go down like a lead balloon but I don't see why a save the date poem would offend anyone particularly. People on here just seem to be particularly bitchy tonight

It's not actual tent camping (although you can put tents there) They have all sorts of caravans, teepees, hurts etc. Ours is kind of a half tent/half house type thing. It's called a safari house I think.

I can not believe you're even asking this.

That's alright, if I find the poem we'll probably use it! Otherwise I might have a look on Pinterest for suggestions

So whilst a tenner is good value, what if someone has 10 double vodkas along with 3 cocktails and other drinks? there will be people that will take libertys if they think there is a free bar.

Also it is a bit cheeky to ask, however if you do i think you will end up out of pocket in a huge way.

Hopefully none of the guests are mumsnetters!!! 😂😂😳 if they are ill be able to spot them. They'll be the ones that don't come! #winner

Oh so that makes our last Valentine's Day not married tomorrow! Or maybe I'll count next years as well 😂

Sorry if I"m missing something but, as it won't be your actual wedding, why don't you do the party at a warmer time of year? I get that it will be almost your 1 year anniversary, but wouldn't you rather celebrate when the weather will be a bit more Summer Fete theme-appropriate?

OP, what are your thoughts on this now? are you regretting starting this thread?

I love a good invite poem.
Announcing the nuptials with a save the date sounds a great two in one solution. Now all the MN confusion (and baptism of fire for you too) is over, I'm excited for you.
Save the date cards also just need the party date and a note saying more details nearer the time, then 6wks before the date, the proper invite with venue, times and what to bring big/where to park/where to stay/dress code etc.
It will give people something to look forward to after Christmas and they will have January's paypacket under their belts.
Wishing you lots of luck and fun OP.

Why are you on mumsnet then?!

So it's actually a party, and you want lots of booze, but you can't afford to provide it all? Weird.

I expect RAB is asking herself the same thing after the roasting she's received.