"he fights like a girl"- To feel despair at engrained and pervasive sexism

[Evelight]

yesterday evening, I took DS (10) to his Taek won do class. I was reading a book. The Master's son, same age as mine, had broken his collarbone and couldn't practice, he came and sat next to me, and bored out of his mind, started chatting, what are you reading, what is it etc, a nice kid. At some point I asked him if he knew my DS and enjoyed fighting with him (sthg like that anyway). He answered yes, and added jokily "he sometimes fights like a girl."

I was surprised, because at that particular school, there are several female instructors, one of them a former national gold medallist who is amazing. They literally kick ass. I should have had the presence of mind to retort "well if he fights anything like Miss XX, it would be awesome!"- but of course I only thought of that later, as one does, and only smiled uncomfortably in the moment.

the point being- I witness kids (my kids included) come up all the time with all sorts of these (what I would have hoped are but obviously not) outdated pronouncements still rife with casual sexism (girls suck! boys are gross!) despite the best efforts of PC school programming and education. It's not getting better as they grow older either. Sometimes I argue, sometimes I don't. But really, when are we going to move on from this crap?

So, sexism does still go in then? Just not in your life?

I posted this earlier:

And you are truly ignorant if you really think that people haven't used "fight like a n*er" or "fight like a poof" as an insult

As you seem to want to scoff at sexism because you don't experience it, can you please comment on the above?

Sorry that was to Flat.

LassWi
I am wondering where these women work with all these 'out of date' sexist men? Im seriously intrigued. Unless it was way back in the past and they think this is still the norm. Because it certainly isn't.

Felicia
You are talking racism!
We are talking sexism here. This will take the thread onto a different subject. Perhaps you could start a separate thread on that subject if you want a response

I'd like a response to my last post please.

Lilac
No, not in my life. I have been very fortunate in the various people I Have come across in my personal and working life. I am very lucky.

Lilac
Go back to 22.15. I did answer

And racism is wrong, you agree?

And potentially, if you are a white woman, you have not experienced it, you agree?

As a presumably heterosexual woman, you have not experience homophobia, you agree?

But you unable to agree that because you don't personally experience sexism, then every other person who has or does, is wrong?

Have you been on the gin or are you deliberately being obtuse?

But it does exist for other people?

That's what I'd like you to answer because you have spent this thread telling those of us who have experienced it that it doesn't exist anymore.

So, based on examples given to you throughout this thread, does sexism still exist?

its a shame Flat that you think casual sexism so trivial.

I am glad that you have had a good experience at work. FWIW as a solicitor I have seen over and over again that out of the 60% of female trainees about 2% make it to partner.

That is all to do with unequal maternity rights (including which childbearing age women to select for redundancy and which childbearing age woman not to choose for partnership) , which is all to do with insidious sexism, of which the OP's post was all about.

Sorry, but you are misguided and blinkered.

BTW before I had children I may have thought as you do i.e. its not the 1950's. Its not, but we have a long way to go

Flaming
Sorry, so many posts on here.
I think personally, if either a boy or girl was given a put down constantly. Then yes it could affect them. In general do you know of any people that really do speak like this on a regular constant basis?

In saying that I think that there are far far worse things to affect a child than silly throw away comments such as those mentioned.

oh and all the men I have ever worked with were all very PC, they most likely didn't realise either that sexism was alive and well in their decision making.

I mean why would you promote the solicitor who is about to go on maternity leave again, when you have a perfectly good male whose wife will do it for him?

My ex constantly tells our youngest to 'stop crying like a girl'.

DD feels very insulted by that. She says 'as if being a girl is a bad thing'.

And that didn't come from me but from her being smart and educating herself.

Hi Flat, me again.

Just wondering if you're going to answer my questions?

I can remember being offended by the 'you girl' insults that were routinely thrown around by boys in the 70s/80s. I can also remember being offended by the Famous Five. I worked it out myself. Surely, any girl with an ounce of intelligence would?

Lilac
Clearly by your original post it does. In saying that, I dont think it is anything like it was years ago. And times have definitely changed.
I am sure there are men out there that treat women with contempt based on their sex. I think they are becoming a minority based on changes towards women in society.

Lots of throw away comments become unacceptable over time. Thank goodness. It wasn't long ago that 'gay' was also a put down in a similar way, and in reasonably common use. Call it out -that's how attitudes change actually, from the ground up. In 20 years it will sound ridiculous to say 'throw like a girl'.

Actually I don't mean it will sound ridiculous. I mean offensive.

Nope.

Felicia
You really are very chippy and quite rude. Im sure sexism does exist. But what grates me is those that jump up in the air and get offended over very small comments that to be honest most would take as a joke and banter. Im talking adults by the way.

Children on the other hand joke and say things. ie a boy could say to a girl "im stronger than you because im a boy".
I dont think things like that are a big deal. Does not mean the boy will grow into a sexist pig.