Skip to main content
Skip to main navigation
Skip to talk navigation

Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Saved Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Flip

MNHQ have commented on this thread

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

MNHQ have commented on this thread

AIBU?

To not feel sorry for this man begging for money on the road

205 replies

bellaSorela · 04/02/2016 20:24

by the great Cambridge road and saw a man with a sign saying:
"I have no food or money, I have 2 children, I don't speak any English, please help me"

He was looking at us as we were the nearest car to him, my friend wanted to give him money and i said NO don't give him anything and she wanted me to give him the money as i was the driver and the man was on my side but i said no and drove off.
She thinks i was harsh for this but all i was thinking is, if you don't speak English and have no money, how and why are you here?

Do you think i'm wrong for this?

I'm the same with beggers in general, I use to give money but you give money to one the rest will come, like at my local shopping park which junkies have over taken, knocking on peoples windows for money when you are waiting to leave the car park because people are always giving them money now they harass everyone.

maybe i am harsh?

OP posts:

Report

RudeElf · 04/02/2016 21:18

making their DC perform like monkeys in the street and leaving their newborns lying directly on the concrete path. Really not something we ought to encourage over here.

He wasnt making his children perform or leaving them on the concrete.

willowsummers · 04/02/2016 21:20

There is absolutely no way a child would be sleeping on the streets in this country, even if technically homeless. Some sort of emergency provision would be made.

CatThiefKeith · 04/02/2016 21:23

Willow, what exactly do you think happens to all the teenage runaways?

Arfarfanarf · 04/02/2016 21:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

intothebreach · 04/02/2016 21:25

Gah, hit post too soon and without editing. ... But I was only going to rant some more

willowsummers · 04/02/2016 21:26

Cat, runaways are running away - they don't want to be found.

If a teenage runaway of school age (and I concede that is important) presented themselves at a police station there would be a duty of care towards them. They certainly wouldn't be turfed out on the street.

As indicated above, for older teens this duty of care no longer presents itself, but there is still help available to people sleeping on the streets.

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 04/02/2016 21:27

Perhaps he'd fled from his country with his family in terror. Have you not been following the news. The ignorance on this planet is astonishing, at times.
Well tonight thank God it's them. Instead of you, because remember. It could have just as easily be you and your family. In a strange country looking for support and reasurrance.

Backingvocals · 04/02/2016 21:27

Sorry willow but that's not correct. We have gangs of Roma living on the streets here permanently with a babies / children and they are used for begging.

Backingvocals · 04/02/2016 21:28

"Here" = C London.

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 04/02/2016 21:28

Also your friend can give money to the ducks in the local park. If she wants to

willowsummers · 04/02/2016 21:29

And are the police and social services aware of them, assuming you are talking about the U.K?

There is a duty of care towards children and babies. Someone presenting themselves with a child at social services would not be sent back onto the street.

If you do see someone sleeping rough with a baby, I'm a tiny bit shocked that you wouldn't notify an authority to be honest.

Judydreamsofhorses · 04/02/2016 21:29

I pass a guy most nights on my way home from work, and usually give him a fiver on a Friday. If he buys a pint instead of a coffee, that's his business. Whatever gets you through the night.

An ex colleague of mine is currently in homeless person's accommodation, via the local council. His marriage broke down, and he moved out of the family home, then he lost his job and couldn't afford to pay his rent. He has no other family to help him. I honestly think a lot of us are just a few pay days away from being on the streets if circumstances were to suddenly change.

MrsPresley · 04/02/2016 21:29

Can someone explain this bit to me? I've totally confused myself!

my friend wanted to give him money and i said NO don't give him anything and she wanted me to give him the money as i was the driver and the man was on my side but i said no and drove off.

If OP was the driver, surely there would be cars traveling in the opposite direction, so how could the man be on OPs side? Was he in the middle of the road?

But anyway OP, YANBU not it give him money! but you are BU not to let your friend do what she she want.

AlpacaLypse · 04/02/2016 21:30

I only give money via organised charities now. Rather too many pisstakers out there. However the charities I support tend to be the ones who don't have shiny television campaigns. I stay local (and Medecins Sans Frontieres)

AlpacaLypse · 04/02/2016 21:31

Oh and Catapult, which I found on here!

Vanderwaals · 04/02/2016 21:31

Uhhh I 100% agree with you with not giving him money. But you sound very judgemental.
If you want to help homeless people then donate more money to homeless shelters or actually give them food/drink/clothing/etc.

CatThiefKeith · 04/02/2016 21:32

Willow why do you think they might not want to be found? Have you wondered what horror they might be running from?

And my post wasn't just about children, you've conveniently ignored the rest.

What the fuck has happened to Mumsnet.

Seeyounearertime · 04/02/2016 21:33

has anyone else noted that the sign in english said they couldnt speak english? who wrote the sign then?

thats not really the point i guess.

GruntledOne · 04/02/2016 21:33

sorry but if cant speak english you have no job why are you here .sorry but don,t we have enough homelessness with people born in this country without others coming in

But you aren't sorry, are you, aprilanne? And did you know that there are around 600,000 empty properties in England, as against around 90,000 homeless households?

BifsWif · 04/02/2016 21:34

YABU.

Very much so.

willowsummers · 04/02/2016 21:35

Cat, whilst I agree that many teenagers will be running from horrific circumstances, that wasn't OP was addressing or what I was responding to, so it's a bit unfair to turn up the theatrics and make me out to be lacking in compassion because I responded to your post.

The OP describes a man who uses his children to try to persuade people to give him money, as he is homeless, but these children will at the least have access to a bed, clothing and food. Therefore, it is disingenuous to claim that he needs people to give him money to provide things for these children.

Seeyounearertime · 04/02/2016 21:38

were the kids sat with him? how could op know he had kids?
was it all an eloborate sham? who knows?

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Email address

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

bellaSorela · 04/02/2016 21:38

I m from london and have seen on more than one occasion people who beg on the road and become aggressive when the person doesnt give them enough, my friend was only giving him 50p and she asked me to give it to him which means if he decided to get aggressive then i would be the one that got hurt and my car.

Nobody was the say he was actually homeless either, he didnt say this so i dont understand where this comment came from.

OP posts:

maybebabybee · 04/02/2016 21:39

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

bellaSorela · 04/02/2016 21:40

who was the say he was from Syria? where you there and did you ask him?
what is it with people making up assumptions?
so he has suddenly become "homeless" and "from Syria" even though i didnt mention either of these things.
Amazing logic some of you have.

OP posts:

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.