I've been reading this thread, and feeling rather sad. I want to tell you a story about a bloke I spoke to last week, even though I normally keep things like this to myself.
He was sat outside McDonald's, next to a bin. I am skint myself, and normally walk past beggars with a mumbled "sorry", because I simply can't afford to hand out money, even though I know there are plenty of people who could do with the odd quid, and won't spend it on special brew. .
I am aware of the problems with folk who are addicts and feckless and beg for a living. I have known a few personally, what with my line of work and the neighbourhood I live in. Each one of those people has their own story, and it's not my place to judge them, but I do know I wouldn't be helping by giving them money directly.
Still, this young man looked different, and I couldn't just walk on by. I did the usual "sorry" and shrug, but walking past again a few minutes later, I stopped (with my young children! ) and gave him a fiver. He could probably see from the scruffy way I am dressed that I could ill afford it, and he got quite tearful. He said, "most people wouldn't do this, they think I'm going to spend it on drugs or something. I've never touched that stuff in my life, I'm a worker, but look at me, I'm sat next to a bin, that's all most people think I am". He was only about twenty years old, young enough to be my son, and he looked so broken.
He said, "I won't lie to you, I just got out of prison, I've made mistakes". He had been released without a penny in his pocket, and quite simply had nowhere to go. He had tried the homeless hostels, but felt unsafe there because of all the injecting drugs and general atmosphere there.
He asked me if I could recommend a church. He said, "I went to the cathedral, but I just wasn't feeling it, they didn't want to know". I suggested a couple that I knew were committed to helping the homeless, but he said, "no, I don't want any of that patronising shit, I just want somewhere they won't judge me. I want to go back to church". In the end, I thought of a good evangelical place where I am confident they will welcome him with hugs and not care about the state of his clothes or his past.
I'm telling you this not to make myself seem like some kind of do-gooder (I'm not!!) but because he was a young man with a story and a life and hopefully with a future. Judging by the responses on this thread, 90% of you would have walked past him, decided to give a tenner to shelter instead and then forgotten.
How dare we judge? Yes, there are many scammers out there, but there are also lots of genuine people who need a smile, five minutes conversation and some recognition that they are human.
This is just one story. I don't make a general habit of chatting to beggars because I have a lot going on in my own life and two small boys who need me, but I could tell you dozens of similar stories about beggars I have chatted to over the years. The man who had fled political persecution, all his family had been killed, he had taught in a university... The girl who didn't ask for money, but just asked for a bite of the bhaji I was eating... The chap who protected me from drunken revellers when I was young - he had only been homeless for a week, and seemed more concerned about the effect on his dog than for himself ("he's a soft living dog"). The man who spoke ten languages and had worked for gchq for years until his wife died and he didn't know how to cope any more.
Who are we to judge?
Yes, as a general rule, we are better off giving to proper charities. But we shouldn't lose sight of each one of these beggars being human, just as valuable as each one of us. It's just so wrong to see ourselves as any better than them. We are all vulnerable to circumstances.
