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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be having a bit of a sense of humour failure over this?

330 replies

Ellybellyboo · 31/01/2016 11:11

Sorry, this might be a bit long winded

I like 'creative' stuff - sewing, drawing, photography, etc - general art-ery fart-ery. The attic of our house had been converted to a huge room when we moved here so I use it as a kind of studio.

A few weeks ago I had a big birthday and DH arranged a surprise birthday party. I had been really clear that I absolutely did not want a party, I'm quite introverted and just didn't want a big hoo-ha.

He arranged one anyway. I was a bit miffed but grinned and bared it, and actually had an OK night.

In the weeks since, I've discovered that some of our friends had been up in my studio and played some oh so hilarious practical jokes. There was absolutely no need for them to go up there, there's no toilet or anything up there and the door at the bottom of the stairs was shut.

Nothing has been broken or damaged, but silly stuff like a cock and balls drawn onto every page of a sketch book, a huge quilt I've been making and had pinned out ready to be quilted has had all the pins removed, all my drawers and storage had been rearranged.

A couple of years ago I saved up and bought myself a DSLR camera. It wasn't cheap so I'm a bit precious about it. Yesterday we went out for a day out so thought I'd take my camera. Turned it on to find about a million photos of bare arses and I'm not very happy about it

It just feels a bit disrespectful, they shouldn't have been upstairs in the first place and I don't like that they've been messing with my stuff. The more time goes on and the more of this shit I find, the less impressed I am. The whole camera thing is the final straw and I'm having a bit of a sense of humour failure

OP posts:
Original poster
Ellybellyboo · 31/01/2016 13:04

Thanks all!

The quilt really pissed me off. It's a double bed sized quilt, it took hours and hundreds of pins. I had to shift the furniture around to get enough floor space to spread it out properly.

With the camera, it's not so much the naked arses, it's the fact that they've been messing with my expensive (to me) camera when drunk.

I don't think it's particularly malicious, they're not like that. They do this kind of stuff to each other all the time, they picked the wrong target and took it too far this time. The sketch pad on its own - meh

They didn't actually break or damage anything (that I've discovered yet), so they seem to think its hilarious and I'm unreasonable for not falling about laughing.

OP posts:
LittleLionMansMummy · 31/01/2016 13:05

That happened to us Savoy. They put rice crispies, strawberries and shaving foam on our bed sheets under the duvet. We ended up having to sleep without sheets on the bed. I was on my period anyway and in no mood to be messed around. The following morning I marched around to their rooms and told them what I thought of their joke and that i expected them to tell the hotel management and pay for the damaged bedding as they'd soured an otherwise perfect day. I think I actually scared them a bit!

Original poster
Ellybellyboo · 31/01/2016 13:06

Oh, and it was my 40th. We're all around the same age.

OP posts:
Plomino · 31/01/2016 13:07

Now personally , I'd be putting their pictures on social media in a " Guess the arse " competition . Together with pictures of their artwork and mentioning the other two instances of wankery as well . Then if they have a sense of humour act surprised and call it " banter " .

What a pair of tossers .

fuzzpig · 31/01/2016 13:10

Utter twats.

At the very least they owe you a new sketchbook. That to me does count as damage, if they've made it so you can't use any page.

Mumelie · 31/01/2016 13:13

I'm similar to you - 40 arty crafty introverted type- I'd be fuming at so called friends and DH! I'd make him sort it out (getting them to apologise and see that what they did was out of line). A fitting punishment.

MaisyMooMoo · 31/01/2016 13:13

I would feel so angry and very upset. I am similar to you OP, I am creative and have a similar room. The stuff I create is very personal too me so if anyone went in there and damaged it the way they did to you I would feel violated.

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 31/01/2016 13:13

I can't understand the mentality of these people. What they did is vandalism.

Drawing a penis and testicles as a joke might just be funny if you are a 13 year old boy with limited imagination.

Adults who think defacing other people's property or taking photos of their naked bottoms is funny or acceptable are not people I would want in my life.

lavenderhoney · 31/01/2016 13:13

No it's not funny - you welcomed them into your home and they repaid your hospitality by spoiling your work and taking photos for you to find.

These people are not friends, and obviously can't be trusted or invited into your home again. Even to use the loo, would they unravel all the loo roll for a laugh as well? They sound awful tbh, and just don't care. They find it funny, sounds so warped.

OurBlanche · 31/01/2016 13:14

But they are malicious. Malicious, childish, intrusive, thoughtless pratts.

I hope you still have all pricks and bums, collage them, you have the skills. Every special occasion they have they get their joke sent back to them, forever. One of them will eventually sigh that they are bored of it now - that's your cue to laugh like a hyena and ask them why they don't have a sense of humour.

You're 40 now, so save the best for their 60th/retirement/golden wedding anniversary cards.

grumpysquash2 · 31/01/2016 13:15

I would be tempted to download all the bare arses into one big file, send a group email round thanking them for coming to the party and for the surprise gift, and attach the pictures.

You could even add some comments before you convert it to PDF

MaisyMooMoo · 31/01/2016 13:17

How do they know the pieces you were working on hadn't been commissioned?

NightWanderer · 31/01/2016 13:20

Gosh, that's really awful. I'd be so upset.

Nanny0gg Sun 31-Jan-16 12:27:02
I think it's your DH who should be speaking to them and there should be an expectation that they apologise and at the very least, replace the sketchbook.

I agree with this and really why are you friends with people like this?

ValiantMouse · 31/01/2016 13:23

I'd be murderous. Fuck me, I hate anyone messing with my stuff.

I don't think you'd be unreasonable to request a new sketchbook. I'm a writer and if anyone touches my notepads I'd go bloody mad. The ones I buy are pretty expensive- far too expensive to be ruined by crude drawings.

I'm another one who'd be posting their antics on Facebook for everyone to see.

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 31/01/2016 13:24

How do they know the pieces you were working on hadn't been commissioned?

That's not even relevant. The craft issue isn't relevant. I can barely sew a button on but if I had friends who thought leaving a drawing of a penis and testicles and photos of their arses was funny I'd drop them.

ClaudiaApfelstrudel · 31/01/2016 13:24

MissBattleAxe It's vandalism. I'd be having words with those responsible.

yes I agree, a terrible thing to do and clearly not funny whatsoever

ValiantMouse · 31/01/2016 13:25

Ooh, and I think you should email them a link to this thread.

herethereandeverywhere · 31/01/2016 13:25

Oh OP poor you! YADNBU, I'd feel violated too.

I was going to say, well assuming you are a similar age to these 'friends'; I assume you're big birthday was turning 18?

How utterly immature and downright mean of them. I'd fully expect my friends to turn to the next clean page of the pad and write 'Happy birthday old fart' or similar, on 1 page. But that would be it. TBH the quilt would upset me the most, that was your hard work and creativity they pulled apart.

I'd be writing to them and making plain how very hurt I was by this.

Oldraver · 31/01/2016 13:27

Oh so they love a 'joke' do they ? I would be having my own 'joke' with them, Birthday cards with their own arses on, cock and ball designs on their toilet door Grin

AnyFucker · 31/01/2016 13:28

Ugh, some "friends"

Cut them out.

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 31/01/2016 13:29

But they are malicious. Malicious, childish, intrusive, thoughtless pratts

Spot on Blanche

MaisyMooMoo · 31/01/2016 13:35

How do they know the pieces you were working on hadn't been commissioned?

That's not even relevant.

It is actually since it could have financial implications for the OP.

Jux · 31/01/2016 13:37

So a bunch of 40 somethings behaved like a bunch of 8 year olds. Use the bare arse shots to your advantage. Personally, I'd be using them on A3 sized posters along the lines of 'lost cat arse', and stick them on lamp-posts, walls, railings, fences.....

Topseyt · 31/01/2016 13:39

I would not find this remotely funny.

In fact, I would be beyond furious and very insulted. I would confront them about it, complain about the damage (unpinning the quilt is damage) and the use of your expensive camera without your permission. I would hope that they might have the decency to replace the sketch pad with the best and most expensive one available at the very least, and to apologise.

Whatever the outcome, I would refuse to call them friends or to socialise with them ever again.

They invaded your personal space, and a part of your house that was clearly off-limits for the party. You don't do that when a guest in someone else's house. You just don't. Very rude and disrespectful of them.

I am tempted to second the suggestion of the "guess the arse" competitiion on FB or wherever. But that might just be my tendency to be a hot headed old goat when I feel the need.

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 31/01/2016 13:39

It is actually since it could have financial implications for the OP

It's only relevant because it makes their behaviour even worse. Their behaviour was appalling even without the craftwork being an element.

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