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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think my baby is absolutely not too old to be breastfeeding

309 replies

NoCapes · 29/01/2016 21:15

I know what you're thinking, this is going to be about somebody breastfeeding a toddler or pre-schooler and there will be a bit of a debate ...
Well, my baby is 12 fucking weeks old! Hmm

Having tea and a scone in M&S cafe this afternoon when an older lady walking past, not realising he was feeding, stopped to coo at him and when she realised he was fucking about and absolutely not feeding feeding she looked disgusted, tutted and walked away saying to her husband (presumably) that "that baby was far too old to be doing that I mean, really!" Causing a few people around to look over and see what I was doing to my baby

I was shocked and alone at the time (mum was in the queue) and I didn't say anything, just sunk into my chair a little bit
Telling DP when I got in and I'm actually ashamed to say that I had a little cry, and now I'm annoyed that I was upset about it
Stupid woman

AIBU to think - what the fuckity fuck, he is absolutely no where near 'too old' and to be really fucking annoyed with myself that I didn't say anything and that I let her upset me?

OP posts:
ageofgrandillusion1 · 29/01/2016 21:49

I'm not arguing double, I'm just saying that for a lot of people when the kids are walking around, interacting etc and no longer babies, the bf thing starts to look odd. Offensive? No. Odd, incongruent? Yes, for sure.

Doublebubblebubble · 29/01/2016 21:50

Ageof jealous much

SkiptonLass2 · 29/01/2016 21:54

Well I for one think you're being highly unreasonable...

... But only about the scone :) they don't have 'em here! (Major scone craving...) don't waste it!

enjoy your lovely scone. Let baby enjoy his lovely milk. Sod the old witch.

TheCarpenter · 29/01/2016 21:54

Maybe you were doing it wrong if it looked odd ageof? What do you think you were doing that made it look so

Doublebubblebubble · 29/01/2016 21:54

You cant say "3 and over is perverted. I'm sorry, but it is." Then backtrack massively by saying it looks odd, then Offensive? No breastfeeding is beautiful

Doublebubblebubble · 29/01/2016 21:56

breastfeeding is beautiful is my quote obv (posted to soon my breastfed baby wriggled)

StealthPolarBear · 29/01/2016 21:57

Keep going in there and feeding. You'll bump into her again and then your ds can deliver the ultimate put down you will have been training him on intensively until that day.

April2013 · 29/01/2016 21:58

I did it till about 14 months and had loads of stick for that, me too - wish I had told them to f off. I just did what was right for me and my son and stopped when we both seemed ready to stop. I think it is such a personal, individual decision when to stop and I can't believe people get so stroppy about it. Seems either you get stick for doing it or not doing it, you just can't win so it is best to just do what you want.

RudeElf · 29/01/2016 21:59

for a lot of people when the kids are walking around, interacting etc and no longer babies, the bf thing starts to look odd.

Do you understand the difference between personal opinion and fact?

AlpacaPicnic · 29/01/2016 21:59

Well, I'm going to go out on a limb and say that there is a definite point when you shouldn't be breastfeeding anymore. If you are nursing a child that has a full time job, or a child of their own then it's probably time to stop...

AlpacaPicnic · 29/01/2016 22:01

Feckit, posted too soon.

12 weeks old is practically teeny newborn. Interfering woman was clearly BVU.

YABU to throw scones.

RudeElf · 29/01/2016 22:01

Grin alpaca

Claraoswald36 · 29/01/2016 22:02

Must be an m and s thing Hmm. Once in the cafe I was feeding dd2 (newbornish) and my mum discreet img told me the man on the ne t table was staring at me - this is the only time during total 2.5 years of bf babies that anyone took much notice. I looked up, met his eyes and dd2 promptly projectile vomited all over the floor. It landed millimetres from his shoes. That'll learn him!

Theodolia · 29/01/2016 22:03

If your child has a PhD, then you should think about weaning them...

WhyCantIuseTheNameIWant · 29/01/2016 22:03

I thought tis thread would read

I mean, she's only 26. Just qualified from uni as a doctor. I went in to feed her every lunchtime...

Poor dd never really liked food, we tried it fairly often. Most months, in fact. But she always preferred milk.

I didn't mind the feeding, but driving 2 hours each way was getting tiring.

As she will be 27 soon, should I try weaning her?

But no. Nothing as crazy as that.

According to the government thingies, you are half way through the minimum suggestion.

NorthernRosie · 29/01/2016 22:04

You should have squirted your boob milk in her stupid face

backinschool · 29/01/2016 22:04

I sort of agree that breast feeding looks a little odd with older children, maybe above 18 months. By odd I don't mean wrong, just that I don't personally know very many people who have breastfed beyond that age and I haven't seen very many mothers breastfeeding older children in public. I think it's a shame because you end up with a perception that breast feeding is only for the early months. I fully admit that when I had DD1 I thought you just breastfed until 6 months then stopped. I didn't really consider feeding beyond that until DD1 decided she was having none of formula or bottles so I fed her until 12 months when she suddenly decided she wanted a cup (opinionated madam ;) ). I think it's becoming more common though (am I correct?) and hopefully that means it won't be an unusual sight in a few years time. I truly hope that by the time my DDs have babies it's the sight of men leering at boobs in the paper that is thought of as weird rather than mums using their breasts to nourish their babies, whatever age they are.

coconutpie · 29/01/2016 22:06

Ageof- stop projecting your disturbing notions with bf onto everyone else. There is nothing "odd" with a child feeding from the breasts that are there to produce milk for them. Nor is there anything perverted with it. That's just a seriously disgusting attitude to have. Boobs are there to produce milk, that is their primary function, or are you not aware of their actual purpose?

backinschool · 29/01/2016 22:07

Sorry, forgot to say to op that you should definitely have some of these responses ready for next time. We had. Tough time around 12 weeks when DD got fussy and I had very fast milk flow so occasionally I leaked (or sprayed) on my tops. It was hard enough without stupid bloody comments!

MargaretHale · 29/01/2016 22:07

If anyone says anything quietly just respond in loud, disgusted tones NO you CANT have a taste, don't be disgusting!

coconutpie · 29/01/2016 22:08

Alpaca Grin

Kitkatmonster · 29/01/2016 22:08

The woman is an idiot, let it go now and take pleasure in your obvious superiority as a human by not retaliating! I once had group of daily mail readers middle class Brits behind me on a local ferry service in Spain while I fed my baby. They spent the whole journey remarking about my brazen BFing 'yes, but I think that's what they do over here Maureen'. I can still make myself chuckle by remembering their horrified faces when I turned around to speak to my DH and it became apparent that I was English and had calmly listened to every word they had said. Unfortunately so had my DH who felt the need to berate them as bigotted idiots and they scuttled away from us as fast as their little legs would carry them when the ferry docked. I hope they think twice before coming out with another anti BF, anti foreigner/stereotype comment in future...

coconutpie · 29/01/2016 22:10

Margaret - ha ha!

LikeASoulWithoutAMind · 29/01/2016 22:12

What a stupid woman.

Reminds me of the woman in a John Lewis cafe who tutted at me feeding (pretty tiny) dc3 - she was bloody lucky I couldn't get out from behind the table quick enough to give her a piece of my mind Angry

However that was pretty much the only negative comment I ever had in over 3 years of bfing 3 children. More often than not I got lovely smiles.

Hope other people are more positive towards you OP Flowers

starry0ne · 29/01/2016 22:13

I would just like to add

Scone s vital for your health and milk production so never consider throwing such food again throw a celery stick is perfectly acceptable

also welcome to motherhood where you will meet the most ridiculous people with the most ridiculous ideas who not only that are compelled to share such nonsense with you...

Cake have some cake to go with scone