Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 ··· 10 11

Original poster

I found this in my teenage boys coat today[blush]

275 replies

ruthie667 · 26/01/2016 23:50

Not sure whether to take this as a compliment and laugh it off ... or never let him have friends over again lol!!!

I found this in my teenage boys coat today[blush]

OP posts:

Tamponlady · 27/01/2016 11:21

No frame it put it up and don't say anything lol

Furiosa · 27/01/2016 11:23

The patriarchy must have got to me because I thought this was funny. Grim, but funny.

Also what on earth does seriously checking his DNA mean?

molyholy · 27/01/2016 11:23

I think the fact that your DP finds it hilarious says a lot. If my husband found this in our hypothetical teenage sons coat pocket, he would be pretty pissed off and especially if I was giggling all coquettishly over it.

liz70 · 27/01/2016 11:29

Don't have sons myself, don't find it particularly funny but can't get that worked up about it. I wouldn't dream of sharing it online - it merits nothing more than an eye roll and chucking in the bin IMO.

LucilleBluth · 27/01/2016 11:33

No, my DD wouldn't know that it was a pic of a jizzing cock, obviously. Teenage boys can be funny, mine have me crying with laughter sometimes (as I'm sure my Dd will when she's a teenager), they are silly in a way that we aren't supposed to be as adults.

My 14 yo wants to be a comedy writer. He adores Tina Fey, Amy Poehler and Mindy Kaling, he has their books on his desk right now. He would laugh at this.

PurpleHairAndPearls · 27/01/2016 11:41

I have teen DDs and DSs. It's not funny. So it's ok for teenage males to objectify women with comments like "nice tits" I doubt anyone would be happy with an adult male making this comment to them - whether it's written or spoken. Surely we want to start off as we mean to go on and making it clear this attitude to women is not acceptable?

I discussed this with DH who made the point that someone male (ideally a father) should be pulling them up on this and setting an example as an adult roll model. (I normally hate the "well my DH said" on a thread but I think this is a valid point)

caitlinohara · 27/01/2016 11:44

I was thinking the same thing actually purple - if the OP decides to confront it I'm afraid it might have less clout than if her DP did - but he seems to think it's funny, so no joy there. It would be nice to think that the OP's son would take his friend to task over it, as I said upthread, we don't know for sure that he thought it was funny either.

PurpleHairAndPearls · 27/01/2016 11:45

Even the title says it all with the . Why the fuck do people think it's acceptable for a teenage boy to be embarrassing adult women with unwanted sexual comments?

For those that think it's harmless/acceptable/a bit of fun, what age do you think it would be unacceptable? Who would think it suitable to receive this note from say a 34 year old colleague or friend of DH's? What's the cut off on making unsolicited sexual comments, in your view? 16? 18?

peggyundercrackers · 27/01/2016 11:47

Purple they didn't say it, yes they wrote it down but didn't give it to the person. You want to be the thought police too? Had OP not went raking in her sons pockets she would never have found it and been none the wiser.

Boys and men will always think these kind of things - you will never stop tits being sexual. Both Men and woman have sexual fantasies about members of the opposite sex...

LucilleBluth · 27/01/2016 11:50

My god...thought police indeed. I hate this demonisation of teenage boys. Like girls are stifling their giggles into their hankies. Nice tits.

BertrandRussell · 27/01/2016 11:53

I'm not demonising boys.

If I'm demonising anyone, it's the adult women who are finding it funny. I suspect all of us who are not joining in the year 9 type giggle-fest at the sheer daring of typing "jizzing cock" feel the same.

blindsider · 27/01/2016 11:59

*Pipistrella

I draw jizzing cocks too, but only on my son's homework when he is getting frustrated with it and we both dissolve into hysterics at anything, just to distract ourselves.*

I am as broad minded as the next chap but I find that a bit odd even for purposes of distraction.

Pipistrella · 27/01/2016 12:30

It probably does sound odd, but it was an 11 plus practice paper and it was non verbal reasoning, and one of the pictures looked like a cock.

So I adapted it slightly.

It was so desperate trying to get through those papers that we did quite a lot of drawing on them.

And cocks make boys laugh. Apparently. It wasn't just me

Pipistrella · 27/01/2016 12:31

I mean we have a pile of drawing paper under the table and there are a lot of cocks that I didn't draw.

three boys

it's just the way it is.

TannhauserGate · 27/01/2016 12:54

This is weird. I have a DH, that I've known since he was a teenager, and in twenty years, I've never seen him draw (or seen evidence of having drawn) a picture of a dick. He doodles a lot BTW.
I also have a DC preparing for 11+ that has probably never drawn a dick in her life, and I cannot conceive of either DH or I sitting with her whilst studying and drawing a dick on her work.
I have a DS too. He's younger, tbf, but I don't think we're going to change much in the next two years and be drawing dicks on his work.
Don't get me wrong, he quite likes his penis, but there's a time and a place.
We have a very relaxed attitude in our family to nudity, I don't think we're prudes either.
Is it really usual in families to sit around drawing dicks?

inlovewithhubby · 27/01/2016 13:10

I'm tempted to say lighten up to the outraged on here. The writer is a child, he is still learning about socially acceptable behaviour, and he is riddled with hormones and learning how to handle those too. I buy that the note was intended for the son, not the mum, and love the idea a PP had about writing a message on have reverse and returning to pocket. Son will find, be mortified, shout at friend, lesson learned. I would have laughed my arse off in the OP's shoes.

And to everyone who said it's not a compliment - hand on heart, we'd all rather be viewed as princess than pig, and I count myself as an ardent feminist.

Outraged for doodling cocks on work? A shared joke on a teenage level must go miles in terms of bridging the natural fissure that develops between child and parent during puberty. A shared laugh is gold dust. Get them wherever you can I say. My kids are younger and we insert words like poo, wee and bottom into school hymns, just for laughs, when times are stressful. They know it's silly and not to be done anywhere outside school, but my goodness is shared humour bonding.

Happyrouter · 27/01/2016 13:20

Of course it's normal, but why the assumption that because it's normal it's fine? The reason it's normal is that it's normal for boys to grow up to think it's normal to think of women this way because of everything they see in socie around them.

Yes it will carry on until the dawn of time if we all sit and say ha ha it's normal.

I have lost my sense of humour about this type of stuff lately

Happyrouter · 27/01/2016 13:21

To add, I'm talking about the comments about OP, couldn't give a fig about the drawing.

Pipistrella · 27/01/2016 13:46

Thank you for understanding, yes, it is indeed about bonding (and perhaps letting my immature side out)

and if I didn't join in (and I didn't start it, I swear) then I'd be seriously outnumbered in a house full of boys.

It's sink or swim, really

Throwingshade · 27/01/2016 13:48

Of course it's normal for teen boys. Always has been.

My personal objection is about OP is posting it on here, saying it's complimentary to her when it's really not, not striking out the name and potentially outing everyone involved! My sons would be mortified if I posted online even if they were not the ones who wrote it.

UmbongoUnchained · 27/01/2016 14:04

As someone who spent 20 minutes last night constructing a massive cock out if bananas and kiwis with her best friend, I think it's hilarious.

The nice tits comment would bother me though. My tits are not nice they're fantastic.

Hihohoho1 · 27/01/2016 14:07

On for gods sake. Teenage boys are growing up you know they arnt the finished article. It would have amused me too op.

When my lads were teens I collected them from school and a lad shouted through my open window 'top milf'

I shouted back 'only in your wet dreams sonny'

I became a 'legend' apparently.

Look yes it's smutty but really seriously teenagers have always and will skyways be obsessed by sex and bodily fluids and are generally daft.

They mature.

To be honest I found all mine dss snd dds and their friends far more mature and sensible than me and my friends teens of the 80s.

BertrandRussell · 27/01/2016 14:08

Yes, I have a teenage boy.
Yes, I know drawing pictures of cocks goes with the territory.

Clear?

The point here is not the drawing of the cock. It's the written message that accompanies the drawing. Our boys are being brought up to believe that thinking and talking about women in this way is acceptable. And adult women on here are thinking it's funny, or even, god help me, flattering. How are things ever going to change if we just carry on like this?

How would people feel if the name on the note was their teenage daughter's? Is that still funny? Or is it only funny when it's a MILF?

Hihohoho1 · 27/01/2016 14:10

umbongo

A picture? of the cock not your fantastic tits!

Gruntfuttock · 27/01/2016 14:12

"a lad shouted through my open window"

I visualised him on stilts when I read that.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 ··· 10 11