To not move on the train?

[TheCatsMeow]

I was on a very busy packed train with my friend and DS. DS was in a sling, we had the buggy and I was feeding him. We were standing by the doors (no one offered us seats!) trying to feed a screaming baby, penned in by others standing. There was no where we could go.

People tried to push past us to get out the doors and nearly sent DS flying. I firmly asked if they could use one of the other doors and I literally couldn't go anywhere. Cue mutterings and dirty looks!

We couldn't collapse the pram there wasn't room to do and as no one had offered a seat we couldn't move anywhere! WIBU to ask them to use another door?

Commuters are hacked off and can be rude because traveling at commuter peak times is often extremely unpleasant. And often they've paid thousands for a season ticket to experience the dreadful service. No wonder they lack empathy sometimes (not saying they're right to of course, but after a long day at work an unpleasant commute is the last straw).

I always offer seats. I would not have offered one to you as I don't see how you could have sat down. Where would you have put the unfolded up pram, and all your bags? I suspect that is why you were left standing.

It works both ways! I think it's entitled to ask peopke to go use a different door because you have blocked it.
Surprised a manager didn't see you and move you.

Wow. There were people in front of me so I couldn't just get off at each stop. Also how am I supposed to carry a buggy, a baby in a sling, a pram bag, my own bags and feed a baby at the same time?

People with kids are viewed as an inconvenience and it's sad. Instead of able bodied adults walking 5 metres down the aisle it's more acceptable to ask a busy mother with a crying child to repeatedly move.

Damn me having the audacity to have a child!

Wow indeed. OP you are one of those parents- the ones who think they have been elevated to higher being status just because they have had a baby!

Trains are not in station long enough for people to get to a door, find ypu refusing to move out of the way of it and get to another one, they just don't.

You leave your bags piled next to your folded buggy, and step off the train with the others - once they are off you can hop back on.

Your baby was in a sling to feed- it's hardly difficult is it, as though you were trying to make up formula right there on the train.

You therefore really don't need a seat and if you did, having a baby doesnot automatically entitle you to one! If you need a seat you need to ask and not just assume that people with offer you one purely for having a baby with you.

I know I sound harsh but the whole "but I have a BABY!" attitude really, really irritates me

culture I know the service isn't very good, but it's not an excuse to be unpleasant to people. If people hadn't pushed on behind me I'd have had room to either collapse the buggy or stand to the side!

You really are unbelievable!

Here's the thing. When you're going to work, commuting every day, trains are usually pretty packed and generally unpleasant. People who get in your way when you're trying to get off at your stop are irritating. Especially when they don't have to be blocking your way out - like you, with your unfolded buggy.

At the end of the day, when you're going home after a day at work, you're tired and just want to get home. You certainly don't want to miss your stop because someone hasn't had the consideration to fold their buggy, so that they're blocking your way out.

You expect everyone else in the train to consider you and your needs, but you're not exactly demonstrating much empathy or compassion yourself, are you?

Note that I said it isn't acceptable.

I still don't get why you didn't fold the buggy BEFORE getting on the train.

Where would you have put the unfolded up pram, and all your bags? I suspect that is why you were left standing.

Piled bags on my friends knee as he'd have been sitting and left buggy with brakes on? Like most people?

I hate this thread but I cannot stay away

Me too

OP, what were you hoping for when starting this thread? In light of a 99% consensus that YABU, are you prepared to concede that you were being even slightly U? Because if not then this a waste of everyone's time as what you actually wanted was to rant about how unfair life is now that you have had the AUDACITY to have a baby, and not to ask if you were BU.

Or is it all a massive wind-up/reverse?

What if every doorway had a mother and buggy blocking it? Unlikely I know, but it does illustrate why it is an inconsiderate thing to do.

Why didn't you fold the buggy before boarding the train?

I wasn't standing there for the fun of it. Is it that hard to just have patience?

When the train is at your station and you can't get off then you simply can't be patient with someone who is blocking your way and asking you to go to another door. By the time you've turned around and got to the next doors the train will likely be moving again and you've missed your stop!

At the end of the day, when you're going home after a day at work, you're tired and just want to get home. You certainly don't want to miss your stop because someone hasn't had the consideration to fold their buggy, so that they're blocking your way out.

When you've carried an 18lb baby all day in a sling despite having a disability yourself you're tired and just want to get home.

I'm so sick of commuters thinking they own public transport.

But if you had collapsed the buggy before you got on, those people would have had room too
Can you not see how you have caused inconvenience?

That's a question which the OP is completely ignoring, Culture!

commuters are not always rude. Have you never been a commuter op?!

Commuters don't own public transport, but they don't have a choice about when they travel, unlike you.

People got on behind you because it was a packed train and they needed to get on. Did you really expect them to wait for the next train?

Commuters travel back and forth on public transport which is why they're the primary users.

They don't think they own it by any means.

It was your devision to have a baby!
Not the commuters, nor the other passengers!
What about other peopke on the train with children, not like they can just hurry to another exit!

Immoveables: volume of commuters, doors, seats, space.
Moveables: a buggy that can be collapsed creating more space.

Even shouting, 'Stand back! I need to collapse this buggy so we can all breathe' would probably have resulted in the 5 nearest commuters offering to hold your stuff while you did it.

cleaty yes op expected her fellow commuters to part The waves and wait for another train or move to another exit missing their stop. all for her convenience.

Op can you fold the buggy? I have re-read fhe thread and can't see any comment on whether you can still

I do think people are getting a bit OTT with this. I commute, have done for many years. I see situations like this all the time. It's a normal part of the joys of commuting. There was almost a punch up on my train last night about moving down no biggie

If people hadn't pushed on behind me I'd have had room to either collapse the buggy or stand to the side!

Err... So they shouldn't have got on the train at all?

I'd imagine in the evening rush hour they pushed on behind you because they wanted to get home too?

After many years of commuting on the tube to central London for work, I am personally of the opinion that people who HAVE to travel on a train for work, 5 days a week or more, at SPECIFIC times of the day that are known to be busy, take priority over me having a little jaunt out with my baby and my "friend".

That may be an unreasonable view, but I (as a SAHP) have the option of travelling at less busy times, working commuters do not.

You should have folded the buggy before you got on - you still haven't conceded this. Why?