Do you know any misogynistic women?

[ovaryhill]

I've been reading a bit about this and wondered how common it is.
Has anyone had any experience of this?
I know at least one woman who behaves as if she hates other women and is very derogatory about women in general, agrees that wearing short skirts means you're asking for trouble kind of thing, sees other women as a threat and would prefer to work for men
Any opinions or experience?

I don't think bitching is the same as banter at all. I don't think gossiping would be effective networking either!

This is all a bit ironic. Most people on this thread are doing nothing but running down other women.

Agree bumble - both men and women bitch, gossip, banter and network. In fact, the biggest gossip in our team at work is a bloke - and he readily acknowledges that.

bumbley

Men gossip and men bitch, its not called that when they do it

Hapoy to agree that banter and networking are not the correct terms, just the only thing i can think of

Bertrand I have contacted MN again to ask them to leave the posts as they are on the thread.

sir

See everyone is agreeing that men and women bitch, banter, network and gossip

But men are very rarely called bitchy, loads of posts on here and other threads and in real life people say women are so bitchy...but people might say John is such a bitch but they wont say men are so bitchy

Men seem to do this thing though, I suppose they'd call it "banter" where they argue and put each other down a lot. I find it really wearing in certain all-male company. I think, just have a conversation that's nice without all the willy waving!

In fact there's a point - despite getting on better with men in mixed situations and one-to-one, on average groups of men aren't great, for me personally. I'm not sure if groups of women are easier or harder to navigate - it's entirely different. I'm more likely to be excluded from groups of women, but talked over/sort of outnumbered in groups of men... I'm ususally in mixed sex company if in groups though....

Not sure what all this means! All to do with ways of relating, I suppose, that have been socialised in...

I don't agree Rufus. I think in the past men weren't referred to as bitchy or gossipers but language is evolving - certainly my teens and their friends talk about both sexes being bitchy or gossipers.

excellent last post They

I wonder if social media might have a part to play in the bitchy/gossiping thing? More people at it...?

To go back to the original question in the thread.

Yes, there are many women who are misogynists.

A lot of them gravitate to threads like these and, while they make me angry and intemperate, I also feel slightly sorry for them. Society, or life, or formative experience has taught them that women are not to be trusted, not as good as or useful as men. That women can't be trusted with their bodies. That they lie about rape or sexual assault. That there is some kind of conspiracy of women against men.

Recently there has been a lot of talk about online misogyny. A lot of that has been overtly violent and awful. It's my hope that more and more people will see misogyny for what it is and that will stop it in the end. I'd also hope that the children of women who have misogynist views will be able to see past their pity for their parents and do all they can to stop those ideas being propagated to the next generation.

sir

I agree, and I'm happy to agree that teens use words differently

But there are a fuck load of adults who use those phrases still and i think to suggest otherwise is being disingenuous or deliberately obtuse

Oh sorry sir

I think we can both agree that indivdual men are reffered to as being bitchy and that more people are aware that men can be bitchy

But bitchy and bitch are words primarily to describe women

I definitely think there have been a lot of films / tv shows in the last couple of decades that have gotten a lot of mileage out of portraying women as being at loggerheads with each other.

Not in a sporting comradely way like men but in a bitchy malicious way because the Machiavellian backstabbing they indulge in is seen as fun to watch(think Mean Girls). The things they are competing for are usually men, wedding dresses or popularity. Lo behold the career woman who fights for leadership. She will often come to a sticky end!

My teens are young adults so I'll go with a fuck load of older adults - being neither disingenuous nor obtuse.

They - I do agree with that to a point. The problem is that women at the top aren't necessarily portrayed as leaders - they tend to be portrayed as back stabbers who, as you say, are at loggerheads with each other in a Queen Bee type way.

YY They and Sir, the sad old trope of the woman who's only got where she is by being a back stabber/shagging her way to the top does get trotted out too often.

sir

My teens are convinced that bitch is a swear word

I know a woman like this. Doesn't like other women and assumes that all women are sexually threatened by her devastating attractiveness.

The first time I met her was at a social occasion with lots of mutual friends. She was sitting talking to a male friend of ours. I sat down with them to say hello and join in the conversation. The very first thing she said to me was that I shouldn't worry, there was no need to be threatened, that she and X (the man she was talking to), was an old friend and that she wasnt after him. There was an implication that it was only her restraint that stopped this friend falling for her (which is bollocks, he was/is happy in a relationship and she is really not that attractive).

Turns out that she thought X was my DP. She then went on to tell me the line about only having male friends as she gets in with men much better than women.

It's a bit of a self fulfilling prophecy isn't it, if you tell women within 5 minutes of meeting them that you don't really get on with women?!

We might possibly be seeing her again soon (haven't seen her in years), and this time I'm prepared - if she comes out with that line then I'll be politely asking her how she can write off 50% of the population based on their lack of penis!

the sad old trope of the woman who's only got where she is by being a back stabber/shagging her way to the top does get trotted out too often.

There's 2 variations on that. The version held by some feminists that she had to be twice as good as her male contemporaries; or the version that by succeeding a woman then belongs to the oppressor's class and that girls and women are harmed by her doing so. It's the feminist version of back -stabbing . Admittedly the latter is a very extreme view but it is one I have seen put forward.

There's a touch of misogyny in all of them.

Yes... all feminist are misogynists Lass!

I have a MN 'lighthearted' example

A woman I knew who was completely convinced that women had to maintain 'sexual attractiveness' to snare and keep a man. She was also convinced that women were constantly competing for these wonderful men.

She was convinced that women were always trying to 'steal her man'. After I spoke to him politely one night in a social gathering she v.aggressively accused me of trying to steal him and I had to point out I wasn't because:

A) I'd met him. He has the personality of Morrisey with none of the talent.

B) He has the body of an adonis. Truely he has but it is unfortunately topped off with the head of a Peter Beardsley lookalike.

I look back and I wouldn't have been so harsh if she hadn't been so aggressive. I really don't make a habit of being unkind about people but she cornered me in the toilets and threatened violence!.

Afterwards I felt so sad for her that he (or society as a whole) had her convinced that her success in life was judged by her holding onto this very, very average man.

Plays I didn't say "all feminists " did you miss the word "some" ?

"All" was referring to the examples All of those examples in my opinion, which you are free to disagree with, have a touch of misogyny about them.

Is that clearer?

The one about joining the oppressors' class being one which appeared on FWR.

" by succeeding a woman then belongs to the oppressor's class and that girls and women are harmed by her doing so"
Interestingly I have only ever heard this applied to Margaret Thatcher....