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Original poster

Has anyone else had a weird facebook message from an unknown person?

145 replies

katemiddletonsothermum · 17/12/2015 23:02

Someone I don't believe even exists has sent me a message on facebook saying that DH is cheating on me. I think it's a spam, like those emails you get from Nigeria saying you've won twenty million quid if you would only give them your bank details.

I've googled her name, it doesn't exist. I'm convinced it's a fake account and I'll be hacked if I go anywhere near her facebook account.

Has anyone else received strange messages from unknown people? Please answer, before I attack DH with the carving knife.

OP posts:
Original poster
katemiddletonsothermum · 17/12/2015 23:26

Won't I then appear in her list of people to send friend requests to? I think someone else posted concerns that she'd been snooping on an ex and was worried that her profile would end up on his list of "people you might know"...

OP posts:
SquareStarfish · 17/12/2015 23:27

No harm can come from messaging back. Asking for a name or more info or proof.

pieceofpurplesky · 17/12/2015 23:28

I would have to know

TheHouseOnTheLane · 17/12/2015 23:29

Well what does it matter if you do OP? She won't request you if she's someone letting you know about your DH having an affair. To be honest I'd click and see but it will be a fake account....created by someone who already knows you.

Whether it is malicious or real...the sender won't want to friend you on FB! There will be no activity on the profile because as I say, it's been created expressly for this message.

Do you have any concerns about DH's fidelity?

Dietagainmonday · 17/12/2015 23:30

This is defiantly the way Facebook notify you of a message from someone not in your friends list. I believe it's a new feature, I have had two messages this week like this.

Have a look and see if this person has friends, it could be someone set up a fake profile to stir the shit or could be genuine message that this person knows something and wants you to know.

UmbongoUnchained · 17/12/2015 23:30

She will never know if you click on the profile, that's not how Facebook works. You should look. That's how I found out my boyfriend was cheating on me.

Original poster
katemiddletonsothermum · 17/12/2015 23:31

OK, he's due home any minute so I'm going to log off, and then casually mention over the weekend whether he knows this woman or not. He's rubbish at lying so his face will tell me the truth.

Thanks, everyone!

OP posts:
Spilose · 17/12/2015 23:31

Doesn't sound like a scam. Someone may just want to tell you but wants to do so anonymously. The messenger always gets shot.

Most likely they're just a troll

Original poster
katemiddletonsothermum · 17/12/2015 23:32

Call me foolish, but I trust DH completely. Night!

OP posts:
TheHouseOnTheLane · 17/12/2015 23:34

It will be a fake name OP. Nobody would send a message like that under their real name. He won't know her.

Crazybaglady · 17/12/2015 23:35

My goodness i woukd be screeching like a banshee right about now! How do you have the will power not to click the profile????

novemberchild · 17/12/2015 23:36

I got anonymous messages on fb. He was cheating on me.

BloodyDogHairs · 17/12/2015 23:43

Agree with crazy

I would be stalking and finding out more info, no way could I hold off until the weekend!

imwithspud · 17/12/2015 23:46

I trust my dp too. I would have to have a look and try and find out more though, then confront my dp, show him the message and ask him if there's anything he's not telling me. It's likely that it's a fake profile, they're pretty easy to spot so asking him if he knows the messenger probably won't get you anywhere.

Hopefully it's just a troll post. Some weird people get their kicks out of this sort of thing.

19lottie82 · 17/12/2015 23:47

Sounds like someone has set up a "disposable" FB account for the sole purpose of sending you a message. Is there any link to click or anything like that? If not I can't see any reason why it would be a "scam".

Not saying it's true of course, but I wouldn't wrote it off.

AbbyCadabra · 17/12/2015 23:50

Prays I could be that chipper if I ever get a similar message...

Havetohaveanewchufffingaccount · 17/12/2015 23:50

I would still want to look At the profile and I too trust my dh..

fidel1ne · 17/12/2015 23:54

If you trusted him completely why this thread? Confused

fidel1ne · 17/12/2015 23:54

And why the casual mention over the weekend?

SquareRootOfPie · 17/12/2015 23:56

exactly, a fake facebook account set up for the purpose of delivering bad news.

SummerNights1986 · 17/12/2015 23:59

There's a difference between trusting someone and trusting them to the point of stupidity.

I trust dh and I don't for one minute think he would cheat on me. But if someone (even in this way) told me that he was cheating on me, then i'd bring it up directly with him, as soon as he got in* and not make a 'casual mention' over the weekend Hmm

*Or maybe tomorrow if he's worse for wear after the party

19lottie82 · 18/12/2015 00:01

To me there are four possibilities here.

  1. He is cheating on you
  2. someone is convinced he's cheating on you, but he isn't.
  3. he's pissed someone off enough for them to want to fuck him over by telling his OH he's having an affair.
  4. you've pissed someone off enough for them to want to fuck you over by telling you your OH is having an affair.

Obviously I don't know you or your OH but statistically speaking only, I'd say it's probably 1.

I'd forget about it being "spam". Someone has sent up this account for the sole purpose of sending you an anonymous message. sorry.

SummerNights1986 · 18/12/2015 00:01

And wanting to look at the profile would be a completely natural reaction and not particularly linked to your trust for dh at all.

Either the person is telling the truth or they're lying. Whichever was the case i'd want more information and you can bet your last rolo i'd be full on facebook stalking that person right now.

TheHouseOnTheLane · 18/12/2015 00:02

I actually considered doing this myself once. I had seen my friend's DH with the woman he'd had a year long affair with. They had obviously rekindled the affair despite him telling my friend it was over.

The DH was a VERY good mate of my DHs and as couples we saw a lot of each other.

I couldn't bring myself to tell her face to face....I feared her disbelief....I feared she would cut me out in a panic or something...so I thought of sending an anonymous message.

I didn't have to as she caught him at it days later.

unlucky83 · 18/12/2015 00:05

I have a fb friend who I don't really know (a way of keeping a connection going between them and someone else who isn't on fb). They are a young Muslim woman living in a Muslim country, seem to be not very but pretty strict (eg head always covered in profile pics).
A month or so ago on one of my notifications of her posts or whatever they are they seemed to be discussing politics (all in arabic so not 100% sure) and suddenly one her friends posted a pretty explicit pornographic image. Followed by a few more comments - never seen anything like that on her page before - a bit worried that DD (also my fb friend etc) would see it....
Mentioned it to a friend to find her DH had been fb hacked and had been sending out porn to all his fb friends - inc his (teen) DDs.
No dodgy links to click - just images - I can't see what someone would gain out of doing anything like that - but there are some pretty warped people in the world...