AIBU to think that most people don't feel comfortable in wealthy surrounds

[OhYesToYestyn]

and to wonder what exactly is the reason? In the UK, I mainly mean top end London shops and commercial art galleries where it all reeks of wealth.

For example, I love fashion and jewellery design, but if I want to go and look at /touch the garments, I always go to a department store with open plan access, not a boutique. Even in that case, I feel somewhat inadequate and a even a failure for not being able to afford it, though it's irrational as the minority who can afford it have often not made the money themselves (wealthy parents/husbands) and some got it through being ruthless or some other questionable means. I don't often like rich people in the public eye, though obviously there are exceptions.

So why do I feel that physical pressure/stress and even feel inadequate while rationally I shouldn't? I'm talking of people on middle income btw, not very low income.

Shouldn't we all be able to go into any shop and feel relaxed and enjoy the view, and ask for service just to browse? I wonder if others feel absolutely fine and unpressured? Just can't put my finger on the reasons why the discomfort.

Jennifer, do you need to be in contact with him? I came across a number of those when I was with exH who was in banking, some vile egotistic men who despite looking nice you'd want to stay way away from. I find it very hard to stand up to them even also am seething - not that I have personal encounters but sometime in such expensive places yo just feel their disdain to all. I always want to say 'who do you think you are? you are a person like everyone else' but for some reason don't have the guts. I could in private but I wish I could be confident to take such stands in public too (without losing my composure).

even though, not 'even also'

A good point from one of the posters that people from priviledged backgrounds can also feel unconfident and awkward in opposite social gatherings, like say a nice community pub put of london where it's working class and jolly, they may like it but to actually join in conversation and to have a lot in common to talk about, would be a hard task for them. I guessthey just don't go there. In London though it's hard to avoid the wealth plus I don't want to have to avoid it, I want to enjoy looking without even thinking that I owe anyone anything. or something like that.

Some great tips to try in practice on this thread though, have cheered me up no end!

My confidence in those situations comes from a few sources. My amazing Dad is a proper working class lad made good and he and my mum definitely brought us up to feel that we had every right to enjoy the best the world has to offer. We also had friends from all walks of life from a young age. We were not at all rich but comfortable due to masses of hard work. My dad can and does mix with everyone equally well and he has passed on some of those skills to us I hope.

So that has quite a lot to do with it. Combined with a relatively strong confidence in my own intelligence, a pretty broad knowledge base, knowing I can talk well and an unfeigned interest in human beings. I am no beauty but I scrub up ok and I find that most people warm up if you smile at them and treat them as human beings. I think dealing with some of the super rich can be trying so I smile, I'm polite and I enjoy my surroundings. That's it I think.

I hope that doesn't sound smug. I am deeply flawed in many many ways.