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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

Deleting this thread to "protect a poster's privacy"

229 replies

thelouise · 04/12/2015 21:24

In a nutshell; poster throws a strop and doesn't like the answers they are getting.

AIBU to think it's a massive cop out?

OP posts:
StrawberryTeaLeaf · 05/12/2015 13:22

I like the idea of having an outspoken arsey argumentative alter-ego NN. I might give that a whirl over Christmas.

And have to stick to OJ all xmas so that you can remember which mood you're supposed to be in?

M48294Y · 05/12/2015 13:23

That really does sound extraordinary Melcombe. Because usually, as op and countless others on this thread have noticed, HQ will delete threads and posts pretty much without argument if someone has reported and/or op makes a request themselves that they are deleted.

HQ always emphasise that they will tolerate no troll hunting, not even questions asking for clarification of the facts on a thread, and they delete any posts like that more or less the second they pop up.

I'm really intrigued now.

StrawberryTeaLeaf · 05/12/2015 13:25

I could be a very religious, Conservative voting Monarchy loving person. I know all the things such people say having argued against such things for ages on here.

Is that trolling?

That would be a short-lived thing; "You sound jealous" and it's all over Grin

Sparklingbrook · 05/12/2015 13:26

Yes true STL. A few Southern Comforts and it could all get a bit confusing. Shock

StrawberryTeaLeaf · 05/12/2015 13:27

I think we should all just lawyer up TBH. I think I've been taking this MN business far to lightly Smile

StrawberryTeaLeaf · 05/12/2015 13:28

to lightly? TOO lightly.

ElinorRochdale · 05/12/2015 13:29

People don't always need to badger posters for answers and need to respect the fact that someone doesn't want to answer. Yet some posters don't get that and then have a go at the person for not answering.

I remember two threads in particular where this happened. In one, the OP was asking for advice about supporting a co-worker in what appeared to be a very sensitive situation. She said in her OP that she had changed details so the person wouldn't be identifiable, but other posters kept picking away at it - 'You said it was X town, but there isn't a Y in X town' until it was fairly obvious what details had been changed.

The other was a mother asking for advice about something related to an activity her young daughter was involved with. She said from the start she wasn't going to name the activity because it was quite specific and she didn't want to risk identifying her daughter, and it wasn't relevant to what she wanted to discuss. Then there was page after page of people demanding to know what the activity was. Not surprisingly, the OP didn't come back. Then, to finish it off, someone accused the OP of attention seeking, when she'd been driven off her own thread!

Sparklingbrook · 05/12/2015 13:30

I might lawyer up actually. I have been a bit unkind about some slebs today so it might be wise.

Egosumquisum · 05/12/2015 13:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ThenLaterWhenItGotDark · 05/12/2015 13:37
Xmas Shock
MiscellaneousAssortment · 05/12/2015 13:47

I think I remember Melcombes thread actually, and it was awful. Ripping apart facts and hunting down to 'expose' the troll, when the OP was posting about a traumatic and scary experience that wasn't yet resolved. It was vile and I'm not surprised she is still upset about it.

I do think that it's hard to understand the effect nasty posts have on people when they are seeking support in a difficult and intensified moment in their lives. But it's no good saying people shouldn't post if they're too vulnerable to take it, as those are precisely the moments in life people need support and human connection which often isn't available in rl at the time.

I would say that using 'housebound' as an insult isn't ok though. Says the mostly housebound disabled person.

MelcombeBingham · 05/12/2015 13:48

Yeah I'm just lying again. For fucks sake.

MelcombeBingham · 05/12/2015 13:49

Sorry miscellaneous that was to the person describing my experience as "extraordinary".

Sansoora · 05/12/2015 13:50

I think I can remember it also but it kind of scared me so I backed away from it very quickly.

And you know, why would someone lie about it when it would be very easy for MNHQ to call them on it?

Sparklingbrook · 05/12/2015 13:50

I don't remember the thread that Melcombe describes.

AnyFucker · 05/12/2015 13:51

Melcome I think that I am going to consult my lawyer about your disablist posts on this thread. That'll learn ya.

MelcombeBingham · 05/12/2015 13:52

Joke about lawyers all you like. But after being bullied to the point of needing hospital treatment for self harm and absolute desperation and Breakdown after simply posting about the most traumatic thing in my life, yes I went to my solicitor. If I couldn't afford it obviously I wouldn't but I can and it was the only way to get it removed. So duck off with your mocking. I hope you don't find yourself as vulnerable and alone as I was that day. But do let me know if you do so I can accuse you of lying, mock you and call you names

MelcombeBingham · 05/12/2015 13:53

If you don't remember it perhaps you were out doing something else that day and not posting on MN all day...oh wait a minute. That didn't happen so I must be lying.

hobnobsaremyfavourite · 05/12/2015 13:53

Bloody hell

Egosumquisum · 05/12/2015 13:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

hobnobsaremyfavourite · 05/12/2015 13:54

Blimey some people really get what they deserve in life

winterswan · 05/12/2015 13:54

Melcombe, it might be an idea to step away to be honest, this is obviously really upsetting for you.

I must admit, I do remember a thread of mine that went completely haywire once and I ended up posting a photograph to prove what I was saying was true and Mumsnet zapped the whole thing without asking me which I was a bit Hmm about.

It's incredible how much I still hate the poster who harangued me though!

Sparklingbrook · 05/12/2015 13:55

Melcombe if your experience on MN was as awful as you have said I can't believe you are back on here saying the things you are. Sad

If MN is really that bad for you do you not need to give it a wide berth?

ilovesooty · 05/12/2015 13:55

I think that the comments about housebound people on this thread are dreadful.

If Melcombe resolved the issue and is clearly posting under another name now I think the only motive for reigniting it and referencing small numbers of posters has to be to goad.

AnyFucker · 05/12/2015 13:56

mock you and call you names

how come it's ok for you to do it then ?

I never saw your thread. I am sorry you felt so bullied.

But that doesn't make it ok to make disgusting sweeping statements about "housebound" people. You have no idea whether the people who gave you a hard time drive cars, have jobs or haven't left the house for 30 years.