To not take my 3 children to the theatre on Saturday? Terrorism related.

[Kingfisherfree]

I know I am being U but I feel anxious about going to a major city and being confined in a theatre. I have even looked at the seating plan to see how we would get out.

I really wouldn't give your children tips - that will only heighten their anxiety. Also, when an attack is happening, you don't really stick to "plans" - you go onto auto-pilot and act on instinct, so pre-made plans are unlikely to help anyway.

I don't see why you can't "explain" to them. But not in a heavy threatening way! And not in the wrong mood. Ask if any of them are worried, tell them why they shouldn't be and what you'd do. Be reassuring.

They're old enough to google things themselves or talk to friends, they're not toddlers!

You have a general emergency plan for fire etc and point out emergency exits, that they should not panic and just follow your lead if anything happens.

No need to make it about terrorism specifically.

Yy to panic but people also follow orders and whoever seems to be "leading". Your kids will probably turn to you at first at least.

I work in the theatre.

1. Theatres across the country cannot put on extra security. The idea is ludicrous. For one thing, 95% of them couldn't afford it. Secondly, there wouldn't be enough security people to go around. Thirdly, the security wouldn't have guns.

2. It's great that London theatres (the ones that do have the money) have CCTV and bag checks. But that would not stop someone bursting into the show half way through as happened at the Bataclan.

How are you getting to this "major city" to see the show on Saturday? Because, as others have pointed out, you are more likely to be killed in your car or possibly even on the train than encounter a terrorist attack.

Dear god! 'Kids, we're off to enjoy a lovely afternoon at the theatre. But if someone stages a terror attack, here's what to do.' Why make them so anxious?

Work hat on.

In statistical terms, the most dangerous things you can let your children do is a) go near a main road in an urban area, b) use a bouncy castle, and c) go in the playground at school at playtime. We all do these things all the time without a lot of thought.

Going to a theatre, one of tens of thousands across Europe, and worrying about whether a minute group of terrorists will pick that exact night and that exact theatre to wreak havoc, and as a consequence of that havoc you will get hurt, is worrying about something less likely than being struck by lightning. In fact, it is playing into what the terrorists want.

We have a moral duty to continue with life as normal in order to reduce the risk of terrorism in the future, as it weakens the impact. We also need to set an example to our children about assessing risk properly and being sensible. So I would say it is your responsibility as a parent to take them, with no fuss whatsoever (although in your case I would always make sure my phone was fully charged in case of bomb scares and delays getting home).

You can't explain in advance - you don't know how it would happen - advice for one situation may be wrong for another. Self preservation, instinct and the auto pilot will all kick in. I have only been in a life threatening situation once and the adrenaline rush is huge and helps enormously.

I understand why you are nervous but I think you should go as planned and not prep the DC before hand. There's no need to share your anxiety with the DC and in the unlikely event of an attack they will turn to you for guidance anyway.
I hope you have a great time and your understandable anxiety doesn't ruin would should be a fun day out.

I went with 2 of my kids to the big Dr Who event at the Excel on saturday. I must say that there were no bag searches etc but I wasn't worried. I'm going to the theatre with 2 of my kids on Saturday. We aren't worried. For context, I grew up in London in the 70s/80s, I was actually just entering Victoria when the bomb went off there, and I was working in NYC on 9/11. You have to carry on. What's the alternative - hiding in the cellar? With the rats? And the spiders?

Well said expat . Of course you have your worries but keep them firmly to yourself!
Very sane sensible post BoffinMum.

By the way, statistically speaking more UK people are injured by office stationery each year to the point at which they need attention at A and E than in terrorist attacks (I happened to be looking at the accident data at work yesterday, and that amused me). There are around a dozen gift-wrap injuries a year for a start.

Thank you, everybody. I've been too scared to even go to tesco and I live in what is typically a low target area I guess. I wasn't an anxious person before, now I'm nervous even at home.

Thanks for bringing me back to reality with mentions of car crashes being more likely etc. It sounds bloody awful, but that's reassuring. Oddly.

If you won't enjoy it don't go. Mumsnet always has a large contingent of people who just say everything will be fine, most notably in May telling people that going to Tunisia in June would be absolutely no problem.

Personally I'm taking sensible precautions, I don't take the tube in London and haven't since 9/11, along with quite a few people I know. I avoid hanging around busy areas like mainline stations or Oxford Street. If I wanted to go to the theatre I would probably choose one outside central London.

One thing I would say is that even if there have been terror arrests in your city, it's most likely the people there were intending to attack London, not the city they live in.

I choose to calculate my risks, I weigh up how much I need/want to go somewhere against how likely I think it is it will be a target. So for example if I have to go somewhere for work or there is an exhibition I really want to see I'll go. But it's not going to have a particular impact on my life not to hang around a mainline London terminus for an hour waiting for a train so I go for a walk instead.

Thankfully MN has a lot of posters with common sense. There will always be those too far either way. Choosing to go to Tunisia is hardly the same as a theatre trip in London.

There will never be a day that you can take your children to London -until they get to adult hood- say 'how silly' and get a job there!

MumofGorgeousness, staplers are the devil's work. They are the real enemy.

Actually the one to be worried about is fire safety. Road safety we are all more familiar with and sensible about, and we have more training from a very young age. However people are downright silly about fire. Has everyone on here tested their smoke alarm recently? Does your family know how to get out in case of a fire at night? Also what to do if the front door is blocked? Or their bedroom door feels hot before they open it? Do you look where the fire exits are when you stay in a hotel? These things matter.

The trouble with the "there's been a terrorist attack, I must stay away from potential targets" thinking is for how long does this apply? One week? Two? A year? What would make two weeks safer than one? When is that point that it is safer?

The increased risks are just in your head and there's no way for us to know when a next attack might take place. It is scary, but you can't let the scary possibilities run your life.

Am due to meet SIL and her DC next weekend in London hamleys toy parade.

DP and I have debated or back and forth whether it's too risky with ISIS having made a threat on London for November. But we are actually in agreement that I should go with DC as the spreading of terror only works if people are too terrified to get on with their lives.
I do understand your feelings.

I was on the tube when 9/11 happened and came up out of the station to see ppl sobbing and shock everywhere.

I broke my favourite cup on 7/7 and cried so had to reapply makeup and therefore missed my bus. It wasn't 'the bus' but it would have been extremely close.

I'm still going to hamleys. Terror will not control my life.

This...

I don't take the tube in London and haven't since 9/11, along with quite a few people I know. I avoid hanging around busy areas like mainline stations or Oxford Street. If I wanted to go to the theatre I would probably choose one outside central London.

strikes me as very inconvenient!

Do you live in London Booyaka?

I only take the tube if I absolutely have to but that's more to do with the fact that I hate being stuck underground and I'd rather be on a bus that I can get off. I also like walking so I tend to walk most places if I can. But, for example, I'm going out tonight and I can walk there from work but I'll have to get the tube back.

I work near Oxford Circus so though it's HELL and full of stupid people, I do sometimes have to go there.

I tend to think that most Londoners just go about their business normally without ever worrying that something's going to happen, unless there's something out of the ordinary. For example Charing Cross was full of armed police one day a few weeks ago - that did make me stop and think. But only for like five minutes, then I forgot about it.

I think the car crash statistics are far more terrifying than we ever let them be.

If I had tickets I would go, the theatre for a child is such a joy. And they want us to live in fear and stop being ourselves.

But this, for us, is a tiny taste of what the west has rained down in arms on many innocent civilians around the world. Don't shout at me please - but here we live largely with a sense of safety when so many people in the world don't. I'm not justifying anything I'm just saying our bubble has been a very privileged one and my nephew argues that there is an argument for saying that what we have reaped, we shall sow.

Not that you need to consider any of that in this decision! But I feel ashamed at the West's behaviour over the last century in so many places and this feels to me, very very sadly and to my great loss too, to be pigeons coming home to roost.

When writers like Ian McKewan moan about the tragedy of Paris now having lost its "charm". I feel like asking him how many places has the west rendered charmless? It is an important ethical question - do we do what we tell others to do? Do we practice what we preach? My nephew and son don't think so. Sorry to original poster, I would go.

ISIS having made a threat on London for November really

That was meant to be really? Do you have any more info about it?

has the theatre had its ceiling checked for possible collapse?

point taken?

Schools in France have been stopped from taking children to museums & theatres.

www.thetimes.co.uk/tto/news/uk/article4617807.ece

(Not behind paywall).