to think if my 4 year old wants me to take him to his classroom that shouldnt be a problem?

[firefly78]

he's 4 for goodness sake. he loves school and if he wants me to take him to his classroom door rather than go all the way in on his own i dont see why that's an issue. Teacher shouted over to him today saying "come on ds otherwise mummy will have to leave you at the gate". Its irrationally upset me. silly I know but i think they are still so little. Hes coped brilliantly with school, loves reading etc and we have just had a great report. he has an older sibling at school who runs in happily. Oh amd im most definitely not the only parent who does this. He ran in happily before half term cos they got a sticker but dont know so he doesn't see the point! i just think they are still little and i dont know why school tries to make them grow up so fast!!!

giles how many adults have speech and teeth problems? Very few. You also don't see adults with dummies. They will give it up when ready.

Then we reschedule, Sirzy

life or death?

well many things aren't life or death however not treating them.can lead to scaring or permanent damage that wasn't life threatening etc

Because he can do it.

I made a comment about a friend putting salt and pepper on her child's plate, she said,"he likes his mum to do it", the child was 18.

Do you want to be that parent?

" sorry Dr my child can't have his kidney transplants today he didn't feel like getting on the train. give it to the next kid we are ok til next time"

Sirzy distraction, bribery, anxiety reducing techniques, counselling.

But not bullying.

On one of Ds hospital admissions I was talking to one of the senior nurses. She was telling me about the case of a child who didn't want to wear his eye patch or glasses, mum didn't make him. Kept taking him back to the hospital for appointments but obviously the problem got worse and worse to the point this child needed surgery to correct the problem. All because the mum let the child decide what would happen!

Because we were talking about that weren't we Giles

Yanbu, I'm fed up of reading that 'every child matters' and how education is tailored to the individual whereas in practice it seems they try to squeeze the round peg into a square hole as quickly as possible and they must of course be 'independent and resilient' (I agree they must become that, but it's a bit unrealistic in 100% of four year olds imvho)
I really agree with pp who say starting school later would solve so many problems like this.

So now keeping a child alive is bullying!

I really hope this is just a case of very naive first time parent, otherwise you have one hell of a battle ahead of you!

redcar I agree with you, obviously our kids live in basements though!

I'm sorry Tali, but I don't believe you -if your child needed that medication you would give it -and that is not bullying, please don't accuse Sirzy of that - that is disgusting

I didn't accuse her of it. I said I would never resort to it

I would give it but not by holding the child down nishky

How then- how will you give medication to a child that is refusing it?

Sometimes holding down is the only option, do you really think people use it without trying everything else first?

Ok so how do you explain to a two year old about an inhaler fir instance. when they have sod all idea, the thing scares the shit out of them, bribery isn't working and they need it.

trust me you'd sit on them and ignore the crying then

No, I think people do it when they're desperate sirzy

The way my mum got me to take mine nishky, giving me a hug and quickly distracting me. I needed lots of medication as s child and it was vile. I'm not talking out my ass here.

Yes desperate to keep their child alive.

Now if only I had thought to try a hug and distraction hey

by giving you a hug, you mean restraining-presumably she prevented you moving your arms to knock the medicine away?

I would give it but not by holding the child down

Then how would you do it? You've explained, your two year old said no. You've bribed , your two year old said no. Now what?

I had to take my then two year old to a&e after he hit his forehead on the radiator and needed stiches.

He didn't want to get in the car, and no amount of persuading worked. So I had to force him in. He DEFINITELY didn't want stitches, it took two adults to hold him down while a third applied the stitches .

Tough love. He had to have those stitches. It was hard on him, and hard on me, I cried ! But it was absolutely the right thing to do

What would you do Tali?

By the way Ds hasn't been scarred for life by being pinned down for medication when he was younger. Now he is 6 and loves going to the hospital, good job really given how much time he spends there!

Best possible thing to do for a crying child is a quick kiss goodbye and bugger off out the door. Parents who won't leave make things 100 times worse.

That won't work for every child. When mine is worked up the last thing he needs is a hug. I can't reason with him because he doesn't have the understanding. So when he had to have gas before going into theatre he was held down. I don't think the hospital would have gone along with lets all wait until he is happy about it which was unlikely to ever happen anyway.

Nishky No, if I was too upset I was allowed to walk away and come back later.

You can also hide it in food with certain medication!

Budgie with stitches I'd see if he could have glue or steri strips, if not then I honestly don't know id have to deal with that as it comes. Probably ask if there's any prophylactic pain relief or suitable relaxant.

Coming back later not really an option for eg an asthma inhaler is it?