To not know why some people are anti dummies?

[TaliZorah]

Had a couple of comments about using them. I get everyone has different opinions but I can't see a reason to be against them? At least the bf vs ff argument has advantages and disadvantages to either whereas this seems to have no issues?

Something I've been thinking about after a few "MY child didn't need a dummy" (do you want a medal..?)

DS is 22 months and has had a dummy from about 3 days old. I've never put it in his mouth when he's been doing things and he only has it given to him when it's bedtime. I know he needs to consider giving up and it doesn't happen every night now. But it helps him settle, rather he slept well than be awake all night. Besides I can't cut his thumbs off/ control when he has them as easily as I can a dummy.
Do whatever makes it easy in those early months, it's hard enough without making life harder for yourself,all babies are gorgeous dummy or no dummy

My 10 mo DD is grinding her teeth. I'd rather her to chew the dummy than making those sounds. Also, as pointed out, dummy can be thrown away, while thumb is always there.

If I thought dressing my baby head to toe in Juicy Couture and weighing him down in Burberry accessories would help him sleep through the night, I'd do it. Dummies are not "chavvy", they are utilitarian!

My baby is a hard core thumb sucker. Wouldn't touch a dummy (or a bottle ). I can already see that it's going to be an ordeal to get him to stop thumb sucking before the age of about 30!

Ds didn't have one until he was admitted for emergency hernia surgery at 3 weeks old. His mouth was very dry and he was crying and crying. I was stood by his little incubator in floods of tears when the consultant asked the nurse to give him a dummy. He fell asleep instantly. The change was amazing. He just needed something and that was it. Personally as long as you feed, clothe and love your child I couldn't care less about what you do or don't do. Not my business.

Oh and my 43 year old friend sucks her thumb. Apparently she only does it around people she's comfortable with. :o should I feel honoured? She's a stern maths teacher too. Takes all sorts doesn't it?

Ds1 had a dummy at night, which we got rid of at age 2. I only wish ds2 had taken one, but he chews his blanket to fall asleep, and it's proving much more difficult to take away. I think we may have to lose it somewhere

**

Risk over feeding her! Honestly they won't! A dummy is not necessary, I stand by my opinion on that. However if you want to use one it's really up to you!

I didn't like them, didn't use them for my children. It was a personal choice.
I do think that it's rude and arrogant to tell other people what they should or shouldn't be doing with their babies, unless it's actually dangerous.

Ds had a dummy to help with reflux. He was unable to bf so sucking on me was never an option. He lost interest in it by 9 months. He can't talk but I think that is more likely to be due to his asd than having had a dummy.

I said originally that I didn't want DD to have a dummy because I hated seeing a toddler walking around with a dummy,(a warped "before kids" viewpoint) but when she was about a week old, and not sleeping very well, we tried it. She's nearly 7mo now and only has a dummy in bed, or when she is very tired. She's not bothered about it any other time of the day.
There's a lot more harmful things out there than a dummy, so don't understand why people get on their high horse about them

My first had one, I didn't bother with the other two. Nothing to do with being snobby really I just found it a pita. I ended up with a 'spare' in every coat and bag I owned just in case we went out over naptime, and rummaging about under the cot in the night when they woke and needed it to settle but had dropped it was also a real annoyance. I think I just took the lazy option of not bothering so I didn't have to remember or find yet another thing.

It's just a bizarre, desperate notion of snobbery. That said I am according to some as bad because I think get rid after 1 as soon as possible..... They are for soothing little babies imo.

Agree mrstiggy they are an absolute pain in the arse.

I really dislike the look of dummies and I'm not keen on the idea of struggling to get rid of one later. DD1 had reflux and was a poor sleeper but never took one.

However, DS is 10 weeks old. EBF like his sister. He gets to the point where he has fed and wants to suck, but he screams and vomits if he has too much milk. He hasn't yet found his thumb so is disturbed as he roots for his fists and thumb. Until last week we let him suck on a finger, until I realised that a dummy was what he needed. He loves it so we will give him one to help him settle.

I figure this is what parenting is about - adapting to your child's needs, whatever your personal preferences and aspirations. I'm trying to get my ego out of the way

We first introduced a dummy for my son for car journeys. It was either that or him scream himself into a tizzy as I couldn't put a boob in his mouth on the motorway. Frankly it's kinder to all concerned to use a piece of 'unnatural' plastic in those circumstances.

My son still has a dummy for sleeps at nearly 3 but will ditch it soon. He already makes comments about how they are for babies etc.

I didn't have a dummy and sucked my thumb til I was at least 10 and I remember how hard it was to break the habit! I had to as I was having a brace to correct my teeth and didn't want to mess them up.

My new baby has a dummy for sleeps too.

Neither of them have it in the day time unless they are ill or very upset. They help to soothe and I've found them a brilliant sleep cue.

Oh and pre kids I was a dummy judger too!

DS2 (2yrs) has a dummy for sleep. Chatters constantly.

DS1 sucked his thumb. Late talker and it has affected his teeth. He still sucks his thumb and he's 6.

I know which I prefer and it's not the one attached to the hand! The way I see it dummies are only a problem for speech/teeth if they are in ALL THE TIME for years, and I mean literally day and night from birth to 4 or whatever.

I was with you OP until it appeared you are just as judgey about when other people choose to toilet train their children as some people are with you choosing to use a dummy!

It is lazy parenting - if your child is crying maybe you should comfort them and not just shove a dummy in their mouth. It is bad enough with tiny babies, but older children with dummies being pushed in buggies I really hate. So lazy and chavvy. Dummies can delay speech, mess about with children's teeth and they look awful. Dummies can also cause nipple confusion in bf babies if given too early. I just don't see the need for them at all.

Nutella, do you feel the same way about parents who allow their kids to suck/chew a Muslin/blanket/soft toy for comfort too?

'I figure this is what parenting is about - adapting to your child's needs, whatever your personal preferences and aspirations. I'm trying to get my ego out of the way'

Well said ShoottheMoon It's a good attitude to hold onto, even when your children are adults!

Nutella Using the world chavvy says more about you than any parent using a dummy. Although your post speaks for itself.

I try everything to settle my son before he has his dummy. I don't know why I am explaining to you though.

nutellacrumpet, you are being a ninny.

I don't think any of the posters on this thread just shove a dummy in their mouth at the first sign of a cry because they can't be arsed to give them a cuddle. I have 3 children, and have cuddled, co-slept, not co-slept, carried in a sling, not carried in a sling, used a dummy, not used a dummy etc etc with each of them - because they each had different personalities and different needs.

Ds would have been one of those older children you see in a buggy, he didn't have his dummy after 2 1/2, but I know children who do - some like ds are disabled, and have their dummies as a way of soothing themselves when things are overwhelming.

Someone earlier said, no child needs a dummy - taken literally that is true, there are many things that a child doesn't actually need, but we provide for them. Ds maybe didn't need the only bit of comfort he could have in an incubator, hours away from being born, unable to be cuddled by his parents whilst having tubes shoved up his nose, he probably didn't need a dummy to help him develop a strong enough suck to feed whilst I expressed milk for his feeding tube. His paed recommended, rather than say he needed a dummy when his acid reflux was bad enough that he would scream for hours and nights on end, even when cuddling. He probably didn't need a dummy when he had to have 12 tubes of blood taken, or a cannula inserted when that acid reflux aspirated into his lungs causing aspiration pneumonia. No he didn't need a dummy, but at 5 he has had a lot to deal with, and if for a few years a small piece of plastic to suck on gave him such huge comfort, then I am quite happy to be called a lazy parent who shoved a dummy in his mouth.

And tbh I don't see what is wrong with children who need a nap in their buggy, or are being taken on the school run when they are tired, having a dummy and a cuddly or a blanket?

Nutella your attitude is ugly.

Hazeyjane don't let the likes of Nutella bother you. I suspect she's got a lot to learn still.