To not know why some people are anti dummies?

[TaliZorah]

Had a couple of comments about using them. I get everyone has different opinions but I can't see a reason to be against them? At least the bf vs ff argument has advantages and disadvantages to either whereas this seems to have no issues?

Something I've been thinking about after a few "MY child didn't need a dummy" (do you want a medal..?)

[thegiddylimit]

I think using dummies is fairly cultural, I grew up somewhere (old fashioned and rural) where people didn't use them and so I didn't use them. TBH, (and to show smug parenting can work both ways) I remember a 'friend' coming round and DD2 (who was a very easy baby who could be put down for a nap awake and she'd happily drift off to sleep. Freaky child, she still falls asleep very easily even with her little brother having a tantrum in the same room.) was crying and wouldn't settle and was clearly very upset and this 'friend' gave me a lecture about how I should use a dummy to get her to settle and how I was a snob to not use one. Whereas even if I had used a dummy normally it was a situation where presumably it wouldn't have worked anyway because she wasn't settling as normal.

I don't judge people who do use them (Aren't they recommended for SIDS?) so would like to same in return. Less of the lentil weaving insults please.

[Pyjamaramadrama]

I can't think of any reason why I couldn't have the baby attached to my boob in the car driving my son to his own activities.

[Pyjamaramadrama]

No you should only have your babies best interests at heart, sod your other children.

[hazeyjane]

Mrsmugoo, that isn't always possible.

[mrsmugoo]

I don't care if any other child has a dummy but dummies are artificial nipples after all and I just put mine to the boob for comfort.

[VeryPunny]

ispyfispi The evidence of dummies reducing effectiveness and duration of breastfeeding is weak. I read an article in the NCT magazine which summarised the research (mainly done in Mexico, so I presume different attitudes to dummy use). The summary was really quite shrill, stating that dummies would DOOM your breastfeeding. I then went and read the original research which showed no such thing - dummy use resulted in something like a difference of two weeks in breastfeeding g duration at a year....hardly legions of babies doomed to FF by dummies. But the NCT has an adgenda too.

For all those saying that mothers should be a human pacifier - would you have cared to pop round and explain to my 18m DD why her mother couldn't do anything except remain on the sofa with DS glued to a boob?

[TaliZorah]

Okay ispy you pretend you're a perfect parent the rest of us plebs can only dream of.

[Pyjamaramadrama]

You're not happy ispi that's why you feel the need to preach and try to belittle other people.

You keep telling yourself that you're so superior, you're really, really not.

[LauraMipsum]

It's true you know, formula is known to lack the vital nutrient SMuG which is exclusively found in the breastmilk of the types of mothers who take to the internet to tell other mothers they don't have their babies' best interests at heart.

[ispyfispi]

Keep telling yourself that

I'm happy with my choices as you are with yours. I couldn't give a flying fuck about your kids.

[TaliZorah]

Yes it is disputed. The only concrete evidence is the antibodies in colostrum.

A happy mum = a happy child. a mum being made miserable by her feeding choice will not be good for a child at all

[ispyfispi]

The benefits are not disputed. You are ill informed. There are benefits to ff. None of them benefit the child.

[TaliZorah]

With regards to those who don't want to bf? Well I'm afraid I find it difficult to believe they have their baby's best interests at heart when it is well documented that bf is far superior to ff.

Oh DFO. There are also advantages to FF, and disadvantages to bf. I gave DS the colostrum and then happily moved to ff as neither of us enjoyed bf. The benefits are disputed after the first few weeks anyway.

Cannot stand sanctimonious granola mothers

[ispyfispi]

Teacher I did say it might not have been the case for you, how would I know, but I do think it is the case for many. Hunger and comfort ARE different needs but both can/should be met by bf. It is impossible to over feed a bf baby as your body is exceptionally clever with regards to supply and the amount of calories received in total over a 24hr period. With regards to those who don't want to bf? Well I'm afraid I find it difficult to believe they have their baby's best interests at heart when it is well documented that bf is far superior to ff. I don't get why it's so taboo to say that. Everyone wants the 'best' and 'safest' pram/car seat for their baby and does lots of research on that but the one decision that has the most impact on their baby's health/wellbeing (how they are exclusively fed for 6months) is often given such little thought.

[TeacherMummyWhichever]

Ispy... If you really Must know my baby was getting NO milk not one drop! It was ONLY after that did he get offered a dummy! I do not believe what you are saying to be true. Being hungry and being comforted in my opinion are two different things. And again what about people (like most of my friends) who do not WANT to breastfeed?! I tried deseperately and not a drop came for my child, it was very distressing and I do not in one but appreciate you assuming people may not produce because of dummies in fact I find it completely offensive. Let me guess? Your breasts were brimming were they? Well done you! I persevered and could well have starved my child. HOSPITALS advice which I appreciate far more than someone from mumsnet!

[jollyfrenchy]

All mine had dummies once bf was well established, it saved me bf constantly just for comfort.

I agree with those who say, dummies for older toddlers are fine for naps and comfort when upset but not to have them stuck in their mouths all day. I used to have to hide my kids dummies and keep them out of reach, because if they saw them they would have shoved them back in, but I would say it was very noticeable that they didn't talk as much with them in which I why I wouldn't let them have them all the time.

I teach pre-school classes, and one 3 year old little boy has never uttered a word in my class because he always has a dummy in his mouth. Obviously he can talk and will learn to talk properly, but it may well be delayed compared with peers, which at school age (only 4, remember) can then have a knock on effect on phonics and reading.

They also don't look very lovely I agree, but that would be a secondary reason for not having them in all day not a primary one.

I know a lady who has a 3 year old who still bf, I don't judge her for that, each to their own, if the child still wants it that's fine. However, she is basically used as a dummy, every time the child is remotely upset or bored she demands boob so the lady is constantly in and our of her bra (eg about 6 times during a 40 minute period I was with them). While a nice thing to do at bedtime or similar, being a human dummy jsut strikes me as annoying.

[ispyfispi]

TeacherMummy ever thought those things could be related 'could not produce milk' and 'had dummy'? Not saying they are but soooooo many people say they didn't produce enough milk, which unless you are in a very small minority is more likely to be a supply/demand issue than a physical one. Dummies must be a cause for at least some of those people as most people don't seem to realise newborns need to breastfeed for 6 weeks straight to get a good supply established. How many times have we read on this thread people used a dummy because their baby had already been fed/not hungry?

[dorisdog]

For some weird reason my parents and sister were totally against dummies. Then not only did my DD use one, but she ended up always needed THREE. One in her mouth, one wedged in between her nose and mouth and one to rub on her head. She was very happy. My mum and dad bit their tongues...

[Lndnmummy]

My 3 1/2 year old has one to bed still. Everyone i know gives us grief about it. He will give it to santa this year so santa can give it to all the little babies.

If i ever had another i would remove it sooner but it gives my son alot of comfort.

[TeacherMummyWhichever]

Timelytess: What if you could not or did not want to breastfeed? Would you still deny the baby comfort? People need to remember not all people can or want to breastfeed.

My son was poorly and I could not produce milk so he had a dummy. He is now two and only has it to go to bed with at night. Perfect teeth and his speech is fanastic.

My daughter did not have one until she started to suck her thumb and I chose to defer over to a dummy. After having friends and family who have sucked thumbs way into teen and adult life I felt this was for the best.

Sometimes I really hate (but yet cannot help) myself coming on mumsnet. The way people put things are so snarky, snobby and judgemental. This is supposed to be a place of support. Of course everyone is entitled to an opinion but as adults can we not put it in a way that is non offensive? It's almost like bullying sometimes.

People need to remember everyone on here has a different past, upbringing and most importantly baby! What works for one may work for another.

And as for the way it looks? I really could not give a toss! If something makes my child happy and comforts them so be it! Same as if they wanted to dress themselves for the day, I don't care how it looks... I would not judge someone else. If child is happy mummy is happy on my household!

Peace to all dummy and non dummy givers! xx

[OhPuddleducks]

It's an old wives tale thing, I think. DD had one and I had my fair share of negative comments by nearly all from my mym's generation (never my lovely mum though!). Ds wouldnt take one and I was gutted!

[SheGotAllDaMoves]

Very odd that people are more bothered about the look of dummies then the comfort of babies .

I used them on my twins.
They're now 16 with perfect teeth and speech.