Ways in which your life has *NOT* been destroyed since having children.

[Sortedforcheeseandwizz]

Are there any?! Can anyone tell me one thing that makes life with children better/happier/nicer than life before? (Or more than one, if you’re feeling particularly chipper today..)

Doesn’t have to be deep and meaningful, can be anything, big or small!

A combination of social media and a lot of "Just you wait!" people in my life has meant I'm starting to believe that motherhood is horrific and unmanageable. (Some big decisions ahead and having a wobble…)

Ignore the just-you-wait-ers, they are talking crap. Having a child is utterly fantastic. But the positives are impossible to imagine until you have one, whereas the negatives are very obvious from the outside (in fact look worse than they end up being).

Be warned that the just-you-waits continue even once the baby arrives. "Just you wait until they're crawling/ until they're getting into everything/ until they're walking/ until the terrible twos..."

I found DD utterly amazing from the start. At every age, I think 'this is the best age ever' and then she gets even more fun.

You get to see everything for the first time again, albeit through their eyes. It's great most of the time

Go back to really simple pleasures like feeding ducks, kicking leaves, and looking up for aeroplanes. I'm not bored of it yet anyway (ds is 2).

You can re- learn all the stuff about dinosaurs and space and the Earth and superhero films that is really cool, but you've forgotten because grown up life got in the way.

You can reminisce about the books you read and the programmes you watched when you were a kid. Babies are really tiring and boring and frustrating at the same time but I'd give anything to pick one up now without asking permission and having a little hold of its little had because it was mine!

Buggies mean you can buy much more at the shops!

Some kids programmes are quite good.

The cuddles. I could cuddle DD forever and feel like crying at the thought of her getting to the stage where she doesn't want to cuddle me anymore.

Christmas is just magical and they get so excited and happy

You can jump about in soft play without looking like a weirdo

Watching Disney films without feeling silly

They're an excuse for everything. Can't be arsed going on that night out you said you would? Can't get a babysitter

Eastwest I'm no evangelist about having children, but I do feel that life is now in 3-D whereas before I had a child, it was just 2-D. Even though at the time I didn't realise it or feel that anythign was missing. There is a new dimension to life now.

I really like that. I feel the same way.

My life wasn't missing anything before DD, but there is definitely something much vibrant to life now than there was before.

I adore mine! People bitch because they are trying to warn you its tough for the first couple of years but so so worth it. Go for it!

I've nominated this thread for classics. I love it

Love this thread, only 6 weeks to go until my boy is due :)

Psssst.

When they get older become a cm and you get to do it all again but you also sleep.

No way lostcat I only like my own dc

My perfectly lovely 16 yr old asked me to watch Mulan with her last week. Today she asked for some cat ears and walked happily up to the bus for college wearing them. She makes me cry and smile and I couldn't be happier.

Watching my DS grow, learn and discover the world is the best feeling ever and the fact that I'm not trotting off on city breaks with friends and rolling out of nightclubs anymore just pales into insignificance next to the daily hilarity of having a toddler.

I'm back to report that this morning when I sang Dancing Queen DD sang back, 'No, you're the dancing seal mummy!' (which in my grey fleece onesie thing was not a bad comparison )

See, this is why you need a small child in your life :o

Sense of a achievement with every ounces she gains and rewarded with coos and smiles after singing...no one else would do anything but cringe at tuneless songs!

I think it comes down to love if we read into most of the posts. Love is infinite. It is not reduce by having a child plus a spouse to love. It expands without limit (although I appreciate that the demands of babies usually mean spouses neglect each other so I suppose love can reduce between the spouses in that sense). It helps us do things for others (the babies) when we might otherwise have thought only of ourselves.

I get as much pleasure 31 years into being a parent as I did from the start. I will enjoy the next generation (grandchidlren) when they come too. Even my current teenagers are a delight (and that's unusual - teenagers often aren't. I'm particularly blessed unless it is just that the more children you have the better you get with them and that is why they are nice, easy, fun).

For me, it has to be looking at life in a whole new way and getting to goof around all the time! I mean, I used to make a dash for the swings even before DD came along, but it's loads more fun having a little person to giggle with. The sheer joy of the simple things in life is impossible to put a price on. It's really taught me about the magic in the every day things. Sorry if I sound like a drippy hippy even though I am a bit

I get more exercise taking DD out for walks and we get to kick all the leaves, collect conkers, wave to buses, jump in puddles etc. I'd look a proper idiot doing that on my own!
Plus playing with toys, reading children's books, colouring, sticking, play dough.
Making and eating rice crispy cakes.
DD is also hilarious, we laugh all the time.
Take no notice of the doom merchants!

I lost my first child with meningitis at 14 months old. My daughter is now 12 years old and at High School. She saved my life! Not sure any reasons can beat that!

I don't think they can, landrover

So good to read a thread that is full of love instead of moaning.

Also nominating for classics.

Adult life is hard- studying is hard, getting a job is hard, working is hard. Having a baby is hard but every bit of effort you put into it is entirely and totally worth it because you are keeping someone alive and giving them a happy childhood, two of the most important things you could ever do with your time. Everything else becomes less significant in comparison. I've found that because things like work aren't as important, I enjoy them more. Why stress about a job when you can just get another one? Children are truly irreplaceable, truly valuable.

I have an entire file on my phone full of hilarious, loving, beautiful, crazy things my DD (aged 2) has done or said. She makes me laugh every day. She has given my life a sense of purpose and meaning that I didn't have before. I have never experienced such selfless, mind-blowing love.

She fixes my 'ouches'. She tells jokes. She tells me I'm beautiful. She makes up songs and stories. She makes me proud. She tickles, cuddles, and kisses me. We have long splashy hugs in the bath. She's so excited about Christmas. She's excited about life, and she makes me feel that way again. Sure, I'd love some proper sleep, but I can honestly say - everything is better with her in my life.

Life is far, far less comfortable than it was pre DC. My old life has been torpedoed, frankly. How much this will happen to you depends on what your DC are like - I have a rather difficult spirited 3 year old and a baby, and neither are good sleepers.

But...

My life is also much more varied and interesting. There is so much more going on every day than there used to be (partly because I get a lot less sleep!). There is so much more noise, colour, activity, laughing. The questions DD asks and the things she comes out with are priceless.

I have met lots of lovely new friends through DC. I love seeing the pleasure that the DC give to my parents and PILs. Family occasions are much more fun now.

I look back at my old life, and I feel like a few days of that would be lovely as a break from DC chaos, but endless years of that would be very boring.

Oh, and DH and I are even closer than we were pre DC. We do bicker more (tiredness) but having children has definitely brought us much closer together. Shared adversity and all that

I get to buy as many stickers as I want and no one bats an eyelid. Sometimes I even let DD play with them...

I also realise a lot of the things I used to worry about were less meaningful than I realised. I know that it's all relevant to the time of your life but sometimes I see the things my little sister gets so stressed over and I want to pat her gently and tell her it's not worth the wrinkles...I wouldn't though because I know how condescending it would be!