WIBU to have slapped his face?

[BMW6]

This afternoon a man (mid fifties) in the street said to me "excuse me darlin' but can I tell you you've got really impressive tits"

Without any thought I slapped his face and gave him a raging dressing down - he just stood there stunned looking and mumbled "sorry darlin'" (which enraged me all the more)

I am conflicted - part of me is horrified that I reacted violently, the other part is still fuming and kind of glad I slapped him.

Did I over-react?

but also

What exactly is a 'typical offended woman slap'?

CIBarnaby "Did this actually happen"

I knew someone would ask this but I wasn't expecting it to be a Chief Inspector

VestalVirgin - I certainly consider a slap an assault. It's not GBH, but it's assault.

PS Vestal - I reckon if I gave someone a "typical offended woman slap" it would hurt!

I think that's fine.

He said a rude comment and got a rude response. I wouldn't encourage slapping random people, but sometimes they really do deserve it. He's welcome to go to the police and say a woman slapped him after he sexually harassed her. I'm sure he'll get far.

I don't know how UK law works, but in the US it could count as self defense since you felt threatened and in most states you have no duty to retreat first.

I've pulled a knife on a guy that was harassing me, and once on a guy that was following me. It's amazing but they suddenly didn't want to be in my personal space or same general area after that. They quickly left and I continued walking home. Sometimes the only way idiots will leave you alone is if you let them know you speak their same language.

He'd already verbally assaulted her in a very nasty way in a public place and thought he had the right to do so. A slap is the least he should've had coming to him.

it's mine allegedly ?

Senpai you can't pull knives on people in the UK. Depending on the circumstances actually just having a knife in your possession can be an offence in law.

I think it's battery, legally. You can't go about hitting people even if they do make offensive remarks. Raising your hand so as to cause him to think you would hit him would count as assault.

Yes, it DID actually happen.

No I am not proud of my physical reaction - as I said in my OP I feel conflicted.

As others have pointed out, he could well have hit me back, but I was so instantly enraged that thought never crossed my mind.

Most of you think I was unreasonable, which is fair enough since I did ask, and is what I was wondering myself.

In the UK, you'd be arrested for threatening someone with a knife! It's classed as a dangerous weapon and if you're found to be carrying one in certain circumstances, it's illegal.

Thing is, if a man slaps a woman, there's usually much more strength behind that than when it happens the other way round, and I think the law should make a difference.

Besides, I was once advised to not sue after a man kissed me against my will. That's as much touching as a slap is, and leaves much more damage.

And then, there's the fact that it's self defense.

A man commenting on your tits while you are walking down the street alone is threatening you in a rather obvious way, and I think even kneeing him in the groin should be considered self-defense.

We live in a world where women are expected to use violence against rapists if we want any chance for the rapist to land in prison, but slapping someone who sexually harasses you is wrong? When exactly, inbetween, does it become not only right but a requirement?

He was a twat.

That's doesn't excuse slapping though.

You could be done for assault. You probably won't but technically you could.

Yabu, but you know that

Stupid and not helpful. He'll dine out on that for ages.

Also the stereotypical silly woman who slaps the man because she has been insulted and then kisses him is a cliche.

Ignore him

Thing is, if a man slaps a woman, there's usually much more strength behind that than when it happens the other way round, and I think the law should make a difference.

That's not always true. The law can't start doing strength tests on defendants and victims.

Putting your hands on another person is not ok.

Someone said something similar to me once. I was a student, walking alone in the dark and two men made some slightly more graphic comments, I felt threatened and backed into a corner, even if they hadn't meant it to threatening, that's how it felt. I'm one hundred percent for this guy getting it made very clear to him the inappropriateness of his comment...hopefully he won't do it again to someone who feels more vulnerable than you did.

He was a massive twat but I'm afraid you sound like a nasty piece of work to respond in that way.

Of course he'll do it again.

A slap from the OP is hardly going to make him change his ways.

In fact, he'll probably tell the 'hilarious' story to his friends, every time he gets drunk.

Pre-emptive strikes
There is no rule in law to say that a person must wait to be struck first before they may defend themselves, (see R v Deana, 2 Cr App R 75).

www.cps.gov.uk/legal/s_to_u/self_defence/

Thing is, if a man slaps a woman, there's usually much more strength behind that than when it happens the other way round, and I think the law should make a difference.

Nonsense it's assault either way.

OP, you should have stuck to the verbal dressing down - that he absolutely deserved.

Conflicted?

Apart from anything else it is not safe to slap people in the street.

A sexist misogynist bastard may be as capable of punching a woman as making leery comments at her. And yes he could / would have been done for assault, but what comfort is that when you are recovering with a cracked cheekbone?

Had you been observed by the police you would have got a caution at the very least. 'He made a comment about my tits' is not legal mitigation for slapping people and neither should it be. It wasn't self defence , he wasn't trying to grab you.

Words do not hurt people. Words can be fought with words. Words can be fought within your own mind.

You are not a conquering heroin in my name - grow up.

But I am sorry you were subjected to mindless sexist crap on the street.

I think the fact that the OP finished her post with a huge grin says she doesn't really think she did anything wrong.