To leave work and go on benefits?

[AllOfTheCoffee]

[prepares for flaming]

I work in a coffee shop that turns into a wine bar on a weekend.

I've been there since it opened 7 years ago. I am only the member of staff who's been there since the start and as such whenever anyone leaves I am just expected to cover their shifts until a replacement is found.

I started there on a 15 hours a week, when I left my Ex-H a couple of years ago I asked for more hours, my boss gave me weekends and evenings to top up my hours because my leaving Ex-H co-incided with him getting his wine bar license.

I feel like I never see my kids, we can never go anywhere together and it's really starting to get to me. Loads of parents were bringing their kids in ion fancy dress last night (before we switched to wine bar mode) on their way to or from parties, I was working, just like I was last Halloween and just like I am on the 5th.

I haven't had a Christmas eve with my kids since we turned into a wine bar and not likely to get one this year, I am the only one with enough experience to manage the bar on a busy shift, apparently. I've worked every Friday and Saturday night for the last 3 years, every Christmas Eve, every New Years eve and every Hallloween/Guy Fawkes/Easter/Bank Holiday.

I've asked for my shifts to be changed loads of times and in fairness my boss does then start looking for new staff, however because he can get away with paying under 25's less we end up with daft kids who last a few months and then the whole thing starts again and of course they cannot work busy shifts from the start because they don't have have enough experience, in general I get one or two weekends by the time they're trained before they walk out.

I'm applying for better jobs but almost everything that fits in with the childcare I have available is evenings and weekends.

AIBU to just leave? Is it even possible? I'd keep looking for work of course, I couldn't just not work and I'd be entitled to free courses at the college so would look into getting more qualifications.

An industrial/engineering area with a high number of elderly and ill people apparently

I live in the NE, not far from Redcar, so obviously when clerical jobs come up in industrial or engineering firms I am competing with experienced SSI staff and another smaller steelworks has just closed down too.

I'm happy to travel further out and I am looking at jobs I can get to via public transport but atm I cannot drive and cannot afford to learn, but this is something I want to change if I can ever afford to.

Even another dead end job, with less weekends and a holiday entitlement I don't have to beg for would do for now, while I work on getting more relevant qualifications to the opportunities in my area.

I live in the NE, not far from Redcar

I love that coast, used to holiday in Saltburn. Gorgeous beaches and breathtaking seas.

None of which help with your situation

Please continue.

Can you get to Stockton? Mamas and papas are advertising christmas jobs.

www.retailchoice.com/JobSearch/Results.aspx?Keywords=&LTxt=Redcar&Radius=10

Its worth signing up with agencies too.

Op could you get to stockton?

Reed.co.uk have got quite a few jobs.

My heart sank at Redcar. I'm from the NE and moved to London for work. It would certainly be easier within the M25 than in Redcar.

Spec letters and CV's are your friend here. Make a list of companies that have the type of work you are looking for and send a cover letter and cv to them. That is how I got the job I have now.

I could get to Stockton center but not the retail parks, unless it doesn't involve evenings, buses stop running to them when the shops close, I'm not sure where the Bon Lea one is, but they're normally in the arse end of no-where.

I'll pm you

Ive got an interview

My first one ever. I didn't even apply to the job, they saw my CV on a jobsite and would like to invite me for an interview.

For a supervisors position.

I am so excited.

The new girl quit yesterday. Apparently she did not receive adequate training to clean the bar area or tables and is unhappy with the customers swearing in front of her I will admit that I did not train her to clean tables, surely life in general teaches you this? You spray, you wipe. Simple right?

My 9yo knows how to clean tables.

My boss thinks he shouldn't look for new staff until after Christmas

In the mean time I assume you'll be expected to cover staff shortage?

Good luck with interview :) sounds great.

Yes, I am down for all of her shifts from now until after Christmas. I wonder how he will cope on Christmas Eve, our busiest shift of the year running the kitchen and the bar all alone?

I might agree to come in and help for a few hours. For £10 an hour.

It's for a retail position and involves some weekends, but days only, so we could still go to the Cinema or out for tea when I finish.

Plus it's for a tech shop. I will be in heaven surrounded by computers and laptops. I'll be skint but happy.

[getting ahead of myself a bit here]

Good luck!!! I'll have everything crossed for you, the job sounds great. Positive thinking - keep picturing yourself in the interview relaxed and confident and answering all of their questions with ease.

And if you're going in to your old job to help during the busiest time of the year, surely you'll be looking for £15 an hour . When it comes to bargaining for your time, start big, with a little wiggle room for slightly less.

Best of luck, I'm from Teesside and I know it is very hard to find work around there outside of certain specialities especially without a car

Play hard ball with your boss, is he really going to try and sack you when he's so short staffed?

Coffee, remember to research the company as they like it.

Try to prepare some answers to help. Using the STAR technique can help by thinking of a situation where you gave good customer service. Use:

S: Situation
T: Task
A: Action
R: Result

Do not ask about money or holiday when asking them questions.

Show interest in options for promotion and training.

Only read the last few pages but well done on the interview OP. It's great to be able to change things for yourself.

yay! come back and tell us how it went, please!

(Have you found it a confidence boost? Often when you are taken for granted by a current boss, just someone else looking at your CV and offering you an interview is a boost to realise, yes, my boss is taking me for granted, other people can see my potential)

Yes I've found it a massive confidence boost. I am already planning world domination

I've found it more of a boost that they contacted me.

I'm a bit worried about telling my boss, that's gonna be a tantrum and a half [sigh]

It might give him the kick he needs to see that he needs me not the other way around. I won't stay because there is no room for progression, but I might consider doing a few shifts over Christmas for a decent wage, as in being paid for the job I actually do.

My friend used to work next door to where I've got the interview and says they are my kin -read tech obsessed geeks who drink too much-

If you get the other job and resign, just keep it at that and walk away, unless you need the extra cash of extra shifts that suit you .

It's not resigning as such I am worried about, it's telling him that I have an interview and/or working through my notice period.

I have no official notice period in my contract, but have set it myself as 2 weeks.

I want to tell him I have an interview to drive home to him that I am seriously looking for alternative employment to give him as much time as possible to sort himself out, as it stands I cannot see a way he can run his business without me.

OTOH telling him I have an interview will lead to him being in a foul mood with me for days, possibly weeks if I then go on to be offered the job.

It wouldn't surprise me if he fired me tomorrow morning tbh, although I'm fairly certain that I would be unfired by Saturday.

He has assaulted staff members in these past but they were related to him. I highly doubt he would become physically violent with me. I fully expect swearing and telling me I am lazy.

Good luck with the interview.

And if you do tell him you have got one FFS dont tell him where. Because i wouldnt put it past him to phone them up badmouthing you. Dont risk it just in case.

Like i said upthread this arsehole is not your friend And hes not a decent employer either.

If he reacts how you fear, especially violently, I would walk out and speak to ACAS becasue that sounds as though you'd have a case for a grievance and possibly unfair or constructive dismissal.
worksmart.org.uk/work-rights/losing-your-job/constructive-dismissal

Where on earth do you work? I'd quite like to avoid it!

You'd know if you'd ever been in Stealth, it's the place where the manager is often heard shouting obscenities from the back while the woman at the front actually manages the staff.

Sometimes it's a great place to work, when it's quiet he's very laid back, there's none of this finding stuff to do because there's nothing to actually do, we can all just chill out and drink free coffee and read the magazines. When it's busy he can't handle the pace and it takes it out on me and other long standing members of staff who work in the kitchen.

I generally just smile and nod when he starts telling me I'm at fault for everything wrong in the world and then get on with doing things the way I always have done.

good luck