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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?

685 replies

squoosh · 27/10/2015 13:17

Risk of being thrown in the Tower/put in the stocks and all that malarkey if you refuse.

Today I think I'd go for Ralph Fiennes. Look how pretty he is. Yes he's all tortured and angsty and probably ponders endlessly on his 'craft' (yawwwn) but he's just so alluring.

No doubt he'd be a tad high maintenance in the long run but for an enforced torrid affair I think he'd do very nicely indeed. Plus he's probably into all manner of eye popping sexual shenanigans. And let's face it, what's the point of a torrid affair without some eye poppery. Am I right?

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?
OP posts:
Thread gallery
128
HippyChickMama · 27/10/2015 16:56

If it's a prize draw then I've changed my mind because I'd only want Nikki Sixx of 25 years ago. As that's impossible, if I win I'll take Ewan McGregor please Grin

Original poster
squoosh · 27/10/2015 16:57

I'm happy to follow through on my Fiennes affair promise! Oooh I bet I've won, it'll be something to do with publicity for the new Bond film.

Well done me.

OP posts:
WhatTimeIsItCuckoo · 27/10/2015 17:00

Dominic West! But wouldn't say no to idris Elba or Lenny Kravitz either. Oh and Gary Oldman - a long term crush of mine. And Michael Sheen. Oh and I think someone else mentioned Gene Hunt from Life On Mars/Ashes To Ashes - found his un PC and somewhat sexist attitude a bit of a turn on (hangs head in shame). I could go on actually.....

Roussette · 27/10/2015 17:02

Richie Mccaw, captain of the All Blacks, I'd kiss all his bruises better, oh yesssss Grin

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?
WizzardHat · 27/10/2015 17:02

Jean Dujardin, or keanu Reeves. Or both if I must.

2old2beamum · 27/10/2015 17:04

Mick Jagger but I am an old trollop Wink

TheSpottedZebra · 27/10/2015 17:06

LUNCHPACK Lunchpack are you still there?
Your man looks like a Butch Rylan. He really does. Can you see it? You will never un-see it now...

Lottapianos · 27/10/2015 17:07

Dominic West - excellent choice! He would do torrid like a pro.

Squoosh, I think your instincts about Ralph are probably spot on so yes let's share

BathshebaDarkstone · 27/10/2015 17:08

David Tennant.

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?
Lottapianos · 27/10/2015 17:08

A butch Rylan???? The rudeness! Get watching - Mon at 9 on C4. You have no idea what you're missing, you lot

Original poster
squoosh · 27/10/2015 17:09

David Tenant is a wimpier Rylan.

OP posts:
shakeatailfeather · 27/10/2015 17:10

I'm with iklboo re Avengers on a rota :) (although I can take or leave the Cap'n!) If limited I call dibs on RDJ - have thought him drop down hot since I first saw him!

Lucas TH in that vid with Cookie Monster was so adorable! And I love him doing impressions. Not arsed with him as Loki, but when I see him interviewed I just go all swoony.

Recent addition to the list is Jay Mcguinness Grin

IamSantaClaus · 27/10/2015 17:11

Mumsnet

I think you've found your winner . My dedication to following these men ( on social media ) has been second to none . I accept that you have final say as to who is my prize but I'd just like to thank you in advance . I knew I joined for a reason .

Best wishes

Santa

TheSpottedZebra · 27/10/2015 17:13

I AM watching, Lotta. And I was shouting at the telly box last night at Butch Rylan.

LunchpackOfNotreDame · 27/10/2015 17:13

A butch Rylan you what?! Watch him on the SAS programme and you'll be taking that back! Although he does talk with a distinctly Essex/David Beckham type voice...

TheSpottedZebra · 27/10/2015 17:14

I have a pal that looks exactly like David Tennant. People take pics of him and everything.

notenoughbottle · 27/10/2015 17:14

After watching Spectre last night most definitely Daniel Craig...

Lottapianos · 27/10/2015 17:14

He's yum Lunchpack, and not at all Rylanesque

TheSpottedZebra · 27/10/2015 17:16

Butch SAS Rylan maintained his focus on team grooming even when out doing manly, muddy things.

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?
goddessofsmallthings · 27/10/2015 17:16

Christian Bale, Bob Dylan, Antonio Banderas while I'm waiting for my turn with Joaquin, Keanu and J Depp

Back in time it can only be Brando cMutiny on the Bounty with side dishes of Rutger Hauer cBladerunner and the Dude cStarman

Blush moment Ice T... it's the lisp!

How long are these torrid affairs supposed to last for? Less than 3 months can't be termed an affair, can it?

millefeuille1 · 27/10/2015 17:21

Johnny Depp - if I could turn the clock back 10 years for him (or if as he is now, give him a good wash - I'm not fussy).

WhatTimeIsItCuckoo · 27/10/2015 17:21

Love David Tennant too. Lottapianos absolutely. His English accent is hot and his American accent in The Affair is also hot. I recently saw him in the Burton & Taylor film and his Welsh accent, unsurprisingly, was hot. Looking back over this thread there are many faves of mine, this is bringing out my inner hussy! I did omit to mention my serious crush from last year Callum Turner, he of the chiseled cheekbones and full lips. Young enough to be my son mind but hey, one can dream....

Darvany · 27/10/2015 17:23

Young Elvis but without the questionable preferences.

LunchpackOfNotreDame · 27/10/2015 17:24

I've gone off him now. He's a thug a pretty one mind

FunkyPeacock · 27/10/2015 17:25

It would have to be Poldark for me!