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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?

685 replies

squoosh · 27/10/2015 13:17

Risk of being thrown in the Tower/put in the stocks and all that malarkey if you refuse.

Today I think I'd go for Ralph Fiennes. Look how pretty he is. Yes he's all tortured and angsty and probably ponders endlessly on his 'craft' (yawwwn) but he's just so alluring.

No doubt he'd be a tad high maintenance in the long run but for an enforced torrid affair I think he'd do very nicely indeed. Plus he's probably into all manner of eye popping sexual shenanigans. And let's face it, what's the point of a torrid affair without some eye poppery. Am I right?

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?
OP posts:
Thread gallery
128
LemonRedwood · 27/10/2015 16:33

Don't even need to think about this. Jamie Roberts without a doubt.

Mmmmmmm.

Shame I'm probably a bit older than what he's looking for. Oh, and I'm married.

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?
To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?
LemonRedwood · 27/10/2015 16:34

Is it a bit sad that I had those pics saved on my iPad already?

Original poster
squoosh · 27/10/2015 16:34

He's the very definition of barrel chested Lemon!

OP posts:
HypodeemicNerdle · 27/10/2015 16:35

Dammit, I have been beaten to Alexander Skarsgard
So I'll take Joe Manganiello instead please!

Maudofallhopefulness · 27/10/2015 16:35

Stephen Mangan.

Original poster
squoosh · 27/10/2015 16:35

Lucas When I met (walked past) Jamie he had a beard. Quite a short one. He was also wearing a hat.

The entire effect was rather 'hnnghhhhh' inducing.

OP posts:
Lauren1983 · 27/10/2015 16:36

Arsenal striker Olivier Giroud. As he currently looks with facial hair and no streaks of blond in his hair.

WyrdByrd · 27/10/2015 16:38

Lucas & I can confirm that RA in real life with a beard has much the same effect WinkGrin

LucasIsMyMuse · 27/10/2015 16:38

I hope you stalked him and got a good photo? How did you resist bundling him down an alley??

LucasIsMyMuse · 27/10/2015 16:38

We can indeed Wyrd.

IamSantaClaus · 27/10/2015 16:40

I hope you stalked him and got a good photo? How did you resist bundling him down an alley??

This ^

FlankShaftMcWap · 27/10/2015 16:41

Zakk Wylde circa now or then, whenever. Last time I saw him live he was wearing a kilt, that was wonderful enough but then he rested his leg up on a speaker and that damned near finished me off! DH had to support me in case I passed out there and then.

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?
ToysDontWorkNoMore · 27/10/2015 16:43

My ex Jonathan Rhys Meyers or Tom Hardy.

plinkin · 27/10/2015 16:43

Of we can go 'back in time' the Oliver Reed in the Musketeers ... I bet he was an animal in the sack!!

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?
lostinabook · 27/10/2015 16:43

Eric Cantona
Charley boorman

expatinscotland · 27/10/2015 16:46

That Adrian Grenier has beautiful eyes!

Original poster
squoosh · 27/10/2015 16:49

Lucas I thought about bundling him into a sack and back to my house but I settled for cool and calm eye contact followed by a 'squeee' once he'd walked past.

OP posts:
GoEasyPudding · 27/10/2015 16:50

Mumsnet is running a secret prize draw.. One of you posters here on this very thread will win the torrid affair of your choice...thanks for entering!

Embolio · 27/10/2015 16:53

Hmph. I was coming in to say Fassbender but I don't know if I want him now you lot have all had him first!

Jason Momoa might do instead, or a younger Clint Eastwood.

Embolio · 27/10/2015 16:54

Ooo or Chris Hemsworth (but I can see I'll have to fight for him too!)

SouthWestmom · 27/10/2015 16:54

How has no one said Noel Fielding? What kind of women are you?

IamSantaClaus · 27/10/2015 16:54

Excellent pudding . How does it work ? Will they be delivered to my house ?

Sparklingbrook · 27/10/2015 16:55

OMG i am not ready at all.

OnlyLovers · 27/10/2015 16:56

Embolio, to be honest I think quite a lot of people have had Fassbender first...

LucasIsMyMuse · 27/10/2015 16:56

If only GoEasyPudding! Although I suspect we'd all run a mile if it that was true except me.