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Original poster

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?

685 replies

squoosh · 27/10/2015 13:17

Risk of being thrown in the Tower/put in the stocks and all that malarkey if you refuse.

Today I think I'd go for Ralph Fiennes. Look how pretty he is. Yes he's all tortured and angsty and probably ponders endlessly on his 'craft' (yawwwn) but he's just so alluring.

No doubt he'd be a tad high maintenance in the long run but for an enforced torrid affair I think he'd do very nicely indeed. Plus he's probably into all manner of eye popping sexual shenanigans. And let's face it, what's the point of a torrid affair without some eye poppery. Am I right?

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?
OP posts:
Thread gallery
128
Figgygal · 27/10/2015 20:22

Im thinking Chris Pratt at the moment - when did he get so fit???!!!

Bonywasawarriorwayayix · 27/10/2015 20:25

I saw Rufus Sewell once, he looked a tad arrogant a torrid affair should sort that out

NotSkinnyYet · 27/10/2015 20:28

Typing before reading the thread, so I can try argue I bagsied them first

  • Alan Rickman (dressed as Snape preferably, but I'd go for a bit of colonel Brandon too!)
  • Ciaran Hinds
  • Richard Armitage
  • Nathanial Parker
  • Alexander Skardsgard
  • Kevin Spacey
  • Gabriel Macht (as Harvey Spector)

I think that's it....for now Blush

Bigoldsupermoon0 · 27/10/2015 20:32

Following NotSkinnyYet's example and getting in there with my request. Got to be Robert Carlyle - he'd be complete filth, you just know he would Grin Oh, but Robert Carlyle pre awful American tan and teeth. shudder

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?
magimedi · 27/10/2015 20:49

Haven't read the full thread, just the first post.

I am of an age that I'd lust for like a young Mick Jagger.

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?
MrsTerryPratchett · 27/10/2015 20:54

Those of you who've mentioned Gerard Butler; my plumber is a Greek version of him. Christ....I'd like him in a pitta bread covered in tzatziki I properly LOLed at that. Poor plumber.

BuggersMuddle · 27/10/2015 20:55

Ian Somerhalder, but closer to his Vamp Diaries role (maybe not quite that bloodthirsty!), as I think he's a bit 'nice' in real life.

Aiden Turner, oh yes, definitely.

James Marsters as Spike, but only if 15 years ago otherwise he's a bit old for me.

Harrison Ford circa Star Wars if we can go back in time, but I suspect I'd rather bed Han Solo tbf.

Colin Farrell, just for fun.

Alexander Skargard...of course.

I have others. I am resolutely monogamous and would not cheat, but I do appreciate an attractive young man Grin

rainbowstardrops · 27/10/2015 20:58

Oh and James Martin. My list seems to be getting longer Blush

dementedma · 27/10/2015 20:59

Timothy Dalton
Leigh Halfpenny( Welsh rugby sex God!)
Viggo Mortensen as Aragorn
Ewan McGregor

Gasp0deTheW0nderD0g · 27/10/2015 21:02

Another young rock god for those of us with a time machine: Robert Plant.

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?
Jelly101 · 27/10/2015 21:03

Gerard way!

Always fancied him ever since I was a teenager. I'm pretty into the alternative look though Grin

RaspberryOverload · 27/10/2015 21:06

Well, if we're into rockers, I'd go with Shannon Leto on the list, too.....

Doubting · 27/10/2015 21:06

Travis Fimmel

florencerusty · 27/10/2015 21:17

Is my DH's best friend acceptable?

Darvany · 27/10/2015 21:26

Oh dear, florencerusty it has gone all quiet Grin

Show us a pic

WyrdByrd · 27/10/2015 21:26

Dammit fuzzpig I just came back to add Bertie Carvel to my wish list.

I did literally bump into him a few years ago, unfortunately he was in character as Miss Trunchbull at the time!

How about we have him and Captain Jack on a timeshare basis? Grin

WyrdByrd · 27/10/2015 21:28

...and if we're going the time machine route, Robert Stephens as Teddy Lloyd in The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie.

evenoldergregg · 27/10/2015 21:34

In order of preference:
Morrissey,
Romain Duris,
Withnail AND I,
Neil Hannon,
Robert De Niro,
Gary Oldman ( dressed as Dracula),
Bobby Carlisle.

PantsOfGold · 27/10/2015 21:35

Alexander's Skarsgard
Javier Bardem
Mark Ruffalo
Iris Elba
Cillian Murphy

I also have the serious hots for Philip Glenister, I'm not really sure why.

florencerusty · 27/10/2015 21:35

I should add it's not a secret that he is on my 'I would list' which exists alongside the fact that I am as loyal and honest as is humanly possible!

chickensandbees · 27/10/2015 21:36

Has anyone said

Robert Downey Junior??!!!

Amazing actor. He acted the rest of the cast off the screen in Ally McBeal. He is brilliant in everything.

A bad boy past as well!

What's not to like/love/lust????

PantsOfGold · 27/10/2015 21:37

Also Rob Delaney of Catastrophe. Yum and yes please.

Eminado · 27/10/2015 21:50

Iyanya

The.end.

To ask who you'd choose if you were ordered by royal decree to have a torrid affair?
WyrdByrd · 27/10/2015 21:50

Just thought of another one - Richard Osman, and while we're on the less obvious choices... Simon Farnaby (which incidentally just auto corrected to Simon Gargantuan Grin Wink ) from Horrible Histories.

JoffreyBaratheon · 27/10/2015 21:50

I would not say no to Childermass from 'Jonathan Strange'.

Nor would I refuse Richard Armitage. It would be rude not to. Aidan Turner is ridiculously goodlooking and I spotted him first - way back when he was in 'Desperate Romantics'.

I'd definitely find time for the young (as in 1980s) Tom Berenger, too. Stupidly handsome. If it's By Royal Appointment, I'd maybe also spend quality time with former poet laureate, Ted Hughes (back how he looked in the 1960s).