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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to wonder why people send their children to private schools?

491 replies

TheStripyGruffalo · 18/10/2015 12:52

People I know have done it for various reasons a) because they want their children to get all A* grade b) because they don't want their children mixing with the people at the local comprehensive and c) because they think it looks good to have children at a private school.

If you send your children private do you mind saying why? I'm genuinely interested (and I'm not a journalist). We didn't choose private schools because we thought our DC would not be comfortable being amongst the poorest families there.

OP posts:
TheSkiingGardener · 18/10/2015 12:53

because of the 3 schools we visited it suited DS best. If you can afford it it just widens the pool of schools you can try and get your child into.

ConfusedInBath · 18/10/2015 12:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Stompylongnose · 18/10/2015 12:57
  • local state schools are not good enough so cheaper to pay for private school than move house.
  • better holiday/after school care.
  • smaller classes.
  • school allocated by council is too far away.
  • bad experience at the local state school.
ReadtheSmallPrint · 18/10/2015 12:57

We will definitely consider it for secondary. Our local secondary is truly shite. As it currently stands, there is no way DCs will go there.

Moving house into the catchment area of a better school will cost as much as private education from 11-16.

Chottie · 18/10/2015 12:58

Oh dear! another thread which is not going to end well........

Original poster
TheStripyGruffalo · 18/10/2015 13:00

Chottie if it doesn't end well then it won't be on my part, I don't have a problem with private schools, I'm just curious about why people choose them.

What is it that makes the local state school not good enough? I know I've had concerns about my DC being in classrooms with children who mess about and don't want to work but I think you will get some children like that anywhere.

OP posts:
flustercuck · 18/10/2015 13:00

Are you asking people to justify their choices to you, OP?

FartemisOwl · 18/10/2015 13:01

Because I went to my local comps, was bullied throughout for being smart, had to dumb myself down to stay under the radar and had a pretty rubbish education. I don't necessarily care about DD acing every subject grades wise as long as she's happy at school and has the opportunities to pursue what she loves.

3phase · 18/10/2015 13:03
  • smaller classes
  • more flexible drop-off and pick-up times (can drop at 8 and collect up to 6 for no extra charge)
  • holiday provision
  • lots of extra-curricular activities available at the school
MrsFrankieHeck · 18/10/2015 13:04

Because it was the school we liked best and we knew our DCs would enjoy it.

Dreamgirls234 · 18/10/2015 13:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

KatieLatie · 18/10/2015 13:04

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

Caprinihahahaha · 18/10/2015 13:06

You really know people who have told you b) and c) ?

Really?

Only1scoop · 18/10/2015 13:07

I would be surprised if the 'people you know' actually sent their DC private for those reasons you give....

ReadtheSmallPrint · 18/10/2015 13:08

In our area there is a genuine crisis in teacher recruitment. Even the 'best' local schools struggle to recruit decent teachers in maths and science. The 'worst' schools don't have a chance.

The GCSE results of our local school indicate that the teaching of core subjects simply isn't up to scratch. THe average grade for a 'middle attaining' child is C- complared to the 'best' local scool where it is C+. Only 2% of pupils achieved EBacc there last year.

catfordbetty · 18/10/2015 13:08

We live in a world where all sorts of advantage and privilege can be purchased. In this country, education is one of the things for sale.

Lurkedforever1 · 18/10/2015 13:08

Because my local state choice offers fuck all for my academically able child. And the state system itself offers me no basis to make them provide a suitable education. And she isn't spending her secondary years bored out of her mind, being put off education and never experiencing what it's like to be challenged in school, or how to concentrate, or develop work ethics. Which is exactly what a similar school offered me.

nutellacrumpet · 18/10/2015 13:08

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Caprinihahahaha · 18/10/2015 13:09

"So why do you send your child to private school"

"Oh I pay the fees because it looks good. I have no deeper interest in the welfare of my children than that"

..said no one ever.

claraschu · 18/10/2015 13:09

The private school spent less time doing boring stuff and more time doing creative, challenging things. This is partly because they have smaller classes with more kids who are happy to work hard, and partly because they do more drama, sport, art and music.

Also, we live in a very provincial, conservative area, and the private school in a big town further away has black kids, kids with gay parents, lots of foreigners- a better cultural mix. Our local state school is very white, though with a better mix of incomes.

Basically, the private school is more interesting.

Bing0wings · 18/10/2015 13:10

I went to both private school and state school. DCs both go to state school. My parents sent me to private school because 1) local school had bad rep, not behaviour wise but academically. If we moved to the area where good state school was they would have sent me to the state school. 2) teachers at private and state were no different, but private school class size smaller then state school so easier for teachers to see what their students are doing. It was easy for me to coast in state school due to the no of kids in each class. By no means a straight A student, being in private school helped me do better.

claraschu · 18/10/2015 13:11

Oh, I also like the longer holidays and the flexible attitude to taking kids out of school for interesting things (music camp in the US).

BoboChic · 18/10/2015 13:13

Because we wanted (a) selective education (b) better management (c) like-minded families (d) more opportunities.

LeftMyRidingCropInTheMortuary · 18/10/2015 13:16

My parents sent me to a private school (at high school only) because at our local one, I would have had my head flushed down the toilet every day being the geek that I am.

Oh yeah, and, er, because they believed in giving their children the best education they could afford. D'oh!

standinginthedoorway · 18/10/2015 13:17

I went to a private primary school. My mum said this was so that we would get the grades to get into the grammar school which was attached to the private primary and also because she saw little kids smoking ciggies outside our local primary and this put her off. So I guess for her and my Dad, it was a combination of A and B (I reckon C came into it too tbh).

I have one DC. For me, the problem with the state school system is that parents have limited control over where their children go to school. Obviously parents can state a preference and if they would prefer a faith school eg a RC school, they can choose to have their DCs baptised Catholic. We live in an area with good schools and we chose to live here for that reason, but I have heard the catchments can be a bit funny, so some children end up in schools miles away, out of the area. I can't drive, so this would be a complete buggar for us. If my DC doesn't get into a decent school nearby, I would like to be sure we have the ability to send her to a school of our choice if we have to.