to wonder why people send their children to private schools?

[TheStripyGruffalo]

People I know have done it for various reasons a) because they want their children to get all A* grade b) because they don't want their children mixing with the people at the local comprehensive and c) because they think it looks good to have children at a private school.

If you send your children private do you mind saying why? I'm genuinely interested (and I'm not a journalist). We didn't choose private schools because we thought our DC would not be comfortable being amongst the poorest families there.

To add controversy upon controversy, I support single sex education for girls (although boys don't fare as well), and as I live in a small city, there is no single sex state option.

In private school, my children get

*smaller classes (my older daughter can't concentrate to save her life, but flourishes with the attention she gets in the small class)
*fantastic 1-to-1 attention (see above)
*incredibly supportive, relaxed teachers
*slightly longer school day so I can be at my desk at 8.30am and really affordable after school care (although we don't use it)

Going private gave us choices.

In my city, the houses in the catchment for the AMAZING state school here are through the roof. Just looking at the map for the catchment area now, actually, I understand why some areas that I wouldn't have thought were all that great have such crazy prices. For much of the catchment area, although not all, a three bedroom house starts at about £1.1m. Sending my children to private is a BARGAIN compared to that carry on. We couldn't afford to live in the other catchment area.

There are some MAD PARENTS at the private school though. MADMADMADMADMAD. Much madder than at our old state primary. But they're a minority (I think). But talking about other crazy parents is one of life's little pleasures, right?

Evil, I also did TP in a sink school in Coventry in the early 90s. Wonder if it's the same school. Although there were lots of difficult schools in C at that point. Everyone on my PGCE wanted their TP to be in Lemmie!

Because they can and because it's also a way for rich grandparents to exercise control over their children.

They will only make contacts at the top end private schools, if they are male and if they have connections to royalty (not necessarily UK).

mini a few points.
It's 7% that are privately educated nationally. So if the most affluent place is only educating 15% privately, it means other places in the UK lose less than 7% to private. And while you can comment all you want on why people near you aren't simply avoiding crap state schools, you can't actually have personal and extensive knowledge of everyone else's state choices.

I won't bleat at you about scholarships and bursaries. But if you want to discuss them I suggest you do some research, rather than making silly comments. High academic ability is the only part you got right, the rest you are way off the mark. Top independents round here don't follow your thoughts on who gets a bursary.

Both of my DCs went to private school because the area in which they started school had state schools which were not what we wanted for them. Some of their friends started at the local school but a fair number moved to private at 7 or 11.

They have both grown up now, have been to uni and are doing well in their chosen careers. Both are very grateful for their education and feel strongly that it was worth the sacrifices we made. Personally I wonder if it is the extra-curricular stuff that makes the big difference, building confidence and communication skills, etc above and beyond those their friends at local state schools had.

Having said that I don't know if I would do it now as their school has been taken over by a large trust who have let a lot of the more experienced teachers go

In our case it's chiefly because the good local schools are church schools, and we didn't want to have to be hypocrites to get DS in, and didn't want him to have an education with a strong religious element. The other state schools have poor reputations.

We are so pleased we sent him to the non-selective prep school he attended - all the children seemed to thrive, and even now his peers who are with him at his secondary school do really well.

His secondary school is selective, and is getting increasingly good exam results. He is one of the high achievers, and has had some fantastic teachers, with whom he has great relationships. The ethos of the school as a whole seems to be to focus on the measurable achievements and boast about them, rather than to educate in the broadest sense, but despite that he is getting an excellent education.

I compare the education he's getting to mine at a reasonably good rural comprehensive, and it's just so much better - teachers who really want to, and do, engage with their pupils, and enough discipline to enable them all to learn. He's also quite geeky, but has only had a bit of teasing; no bullying. I compare that with friends' children who were bullied quite badly at the local church comprehensive...

I agree with Lurked. At DS' school there are a number of children in care who are on full bursaries. I fail to see (knowing a couple of them and their backgrounds quite well) how they have been marked out for success from an early age. One of them has never spent more than 2 years in the same home so you can't even argue that they've had the consistency of one foster parent encouraging them.

Noofly - how on earth can you possibly know that???

M4 - It was Barr's Hill (I think) - right in the city centre. I did my other one in Nuneaton which was much nicer!

Ermm, because my son is best friends with one and I'm good friends with the foster mother of another and with my personal background, her foster daughter and have had many personal chats.

Not sure why it's odd that I'd know. I know lots of DS' friends quite well.

DH works in a lovely independent school which I would definitely send DD to if we could afford the fees. They don't have OFSTED breathing down their necks and they just seem to have so much more fun together as a community. It's not a crammer, but they have smaller classes, so the children reach their potential generally. There is a lot of hot buttered toast in the common room and jolly sports days when no-one seems to do much work plus longer holidays. Our DCs go to local outstanding comp and I don't doubt that the quality of teaching is just as good (of not better) there but they don't have as much freedom due to curriculum / testing etc.

I know some of my DTD's friends quite well, but not so much that I know their parents' financial situations. You refer to "a number" of children who are in care and on full bursaries. Just wondering how you are so intimate with the school's financial arrangements.

evil yes I think it's the intake which makes the difference. Not the school. If you are good at maths, you children are more likely to be so...

That's why there is so many from private schools going into top jobs. The concentration of educated able parents is possibly much higher at those schools. There will also be state schools with intakes of similar parental ability, and I bet they will also have a good academic record.

It's a self fufilling prophecy in state schools. Because the flip side is very bright ones in low achieving cohorts are often overlooked for the needs of the lower achievers. Thus don't reach their potential and so on to the next generation.

The school (and the other private schools in the area) actively publically promote full bursaries to certain groups of students, including those in care. It's not some big secret. My uncle attended a competing school as a Foundationer (where one parent has died) on a full bursary, if you want another example of a group targeted for burseries. Around September all you hear on the local radio stations are adverts from the various schools trying to entice potential Foundationers to apply. Other than the ones I know personally, I obviously haven't a clue who is in care/Foundationer etc but it's not exactly a secret that they exist and are on bursaries. confused]

The annual report has some detail as well but it's been ages since I'veread it so I can't remember what it includes.

Have found an annual report and am just skimming it and it reminded me that we also get an annual funding request newsletter which includes various interviews with students from all sorts of background who benefited from bursaries. So not public public information, but certainly public information within the school.

I can't remember the specifics now as they weren't applicable to us, but as well as the schools themselves there are some other bodies that will pay fully or contribute towards private school fees for children meeting their criteria for needing help with fees. So eg you wouldn't need to meet the schools academic criteria for a bursary or scholarship, just for a fee paying place, and the external body ( not aligned with any particular school or consortium) would contribute to the fees.