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AIBU?

Dd still cross with me about a level results night...

202 replies

Hannahspannaaah · 05/10/2015 23:06

After dd1 received her as level results a month ago (she did really well so was very happy for her/relieved) she planned to have a night out with her friends. They were going to go to a party or somesuch in someone's field and then sleepover in a tent. Fine.

She was cheeky to me that day though end her sister (who also received results that day) was in a pickle as she'd had a friendship fallout and no evening plans. I saw red and "forbade" her to go out (!!) not proud of that, and suggested a family night in.

It has now transpired that dd is still a bit resentful about that! Do you think I was unreasonable?? I can see that maybe I was but feel like it's a bit late to make it up to her. I feel bad

OP posts:

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OwlinaTree · 05/10/2015 23:08

Depends what you mean by cheeky really. It's an exciting day especially if you've done well and got an exciting party to go to.

Purplepoodle · 05/10/2015 23:09

so you forbid an 17/18 to go out - very impressed she listened and didn't just leave tbh. One best memories is celebrating a-levels

EatShitDerek · 05/10/2015 23:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

nilbyname · 05/10/2015 23:10

There's no point digging over it now though.... Is there?

What do you think?

I'm a,axed she accepted your rule though.....assuming she's 16+?

Tell her you overreacted apologise, but to what end...for you to feel better or for her to hear your contrition? Just wonder of you bring back up to her she'll feel crap all over again?

futureme · 05/10/2015 23:10

Seriously?! You didn't let her celebrate her a level results because she was cheeky?!

JeanSeberg · 05/10/2015 23:10

Define cheeky op.

DamsonInDistress · 05/10/2015 23:10

You should feel bad. She was 18 or only a few weeks off, had just received results for the biggest thing in her whole life so far, and you forbade her going out?! You are very very lucky she didn't just walk out anyway! Yes YWBU and frankly you should apologise.

fulldutypaid · 05/10/2015 23:11

You were wrong OP and yes very unreasonable. I don't blame her at all, it was a big deal for her. Its never too late to apologise and make it up though.

NeedAScarfForMyGiraffe · 05/10/2015 23:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheGreatBigNo · 05/10/2015 23:12

YES

Hannahspannaaah · 05/10/2015 23:12

I can't remember, we had a silly argument and I felt guilty that her sister would feel left out so thought a family occasion would be more appropriate...

Dd brought it up to me, I didn't just bring this up out of the blue.

OP posts:

StarkyTheDirewolf · 05/10/2015 23:12

Honestly, yw probably u. It's one of those nights you never get back. (Sorry to pile on the guilt). I'd probably be resentful too if it were me. Nothing you can do about it now though. Suggest something nice to do together?

VulcanWoman · 05/10/2015 23:13

Yeah, back right off from now on, an adult now, you don't have to put up with crap though, they'll be other things you can use to enforce house rules. Funds being one.

LittleBearPad · 05/10/2015 23:13

You were unreasonable. It was her a-level results night. She's 18 or near as dammit.

IguanaTail · 05/10/2015 23:13

She can't regain that night - it was a one off celebration with her friends from secondary school. I feel resentful on her behalf.

Hannahspannaaah · 05/10/2015 23:13

She got 4 As and apparently her friends are "appalled at what I did", had it in the heck from her today!

OP posts:

Hannahspannaaah · 05/10/2015 23:14

It was AS so year before A Level

OP posts:

catfordbetty · 05/10/2015 23:14

You were unreasonable but there you go, aren't we all sometimes? Apologise if you haven't already and, since she can't get that field/tent/piss-up back everyone's just going to have to move on.

EatShitDerek · 05/10/2015 23:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

fulldutypaid · 05/10/2015 23:14

You put your other childs needs first and you do need to apologise. A levels are a huge deal.

IguanaTail · 05/10/2015 23:14

Well you decided that depriving her of that night was the best response at the time so there we have it.

futureme · 05/10/2015 23:14

I would be too.

Aren't they mainly at uni now?

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VulcanWoman · 05/10/2015 23:15

I'm surprised she didn't just go anyway, I think I would've. Maybe she's learnt a lesson in case there's a next time, hopefully not though.

Hannahspannaaah · 05/10/2015 23:17

She would have required me to drive her there so that's why she didn't go. A friend's mum apparently offered but I didn't want to go back on my word

OP posts:

fulldutypaid · 05/10/2015 23:19

I dont get this post to be honest. Are you stealthing then telling us what an arse you were? If so youre an arse

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