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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To expect discretion in Gym changing rooms.

135 replies

Drew64 · 22/09/2015 11:27

What is it with men who parade around the changing rooms naked, without a care in the world?
After 9 hours at work and an hours commute the other day, I was crouching over my bag sorting out my gym gear when I became distinctly aware of a cock, balls and arse inches from my face as he admires himself in the mirror next to me. I lie NOT! it was swinging away less that a foot away!

Now I have to say that in no way do I have a problem with nudity, even in the company of the same sex. When I change at the gym I don't do so under a towel, I'm just discrete about it and don't parade myself around in front of strangers.

It seems to be middle aged men too, not that I have anything against middle aged men, I'm one myself but come on fellas, be a bit more discrete. I don't want your tackle swinging in my face and if you want to admire yourself in the mirror then please wrap a towel around yourself of put some underwear on!

OP posts:

Thefitfatty · 22/09/2015 12:21

Being in someone's face of touching them is not ok.

I would certainly agree with the no touching, but then again I don't like people touching be while they're fully clothed (unless I've asked them to)!

At the same respect, I've no issues with people walking around naked in a locker room or my DC's seeing it. I want my DC's to be exposed to normal bodies, not hidden from them.

Viviennemary · 22/09/2015 12:24

Communal changing rooms. Clutches pearls! I wouldn't like it. and wouldn't use a communal changing room. Nevertheless this man's behaviour does seem unnecessary and rather silly at best.

BarbarianMum · 22/09/2015 12:26

Being in someone's face of touching them is not ok.

I agree with this but admit I do wonder if all this "strutting" people talk about is in the eye or overeheated imagination of the beholder. Certainly I've never noticed any, just naked people walking around.

unlucky83 · 22/09/2015 12:31

Ohhhhh YANBU Years ago I used to go swimming in a pool with open changing rooms, lots of people walking around naked. I felt uncomfortable trying to be modest.
I was in the shower - a row of them with no partitions - and bent down to get my shampoo off the floor (naked, bent legs slightly and had arse facing wall) as I stood up I got a full on porn shot of the woman next to me - she was bent over, arse facing my shower with her legs slightly apart putting moisturiser on them. Yuk! If I wanted to see that I'd have become a gynaecologist...

batshitlady · 22/09/2015 12:34

Oh come on. FGS if you've a problem with being in close proximity to nude people, I suggest you stay out of Gym changing rooms rather than trying to find fault in those that don't!

So someone momentarily touched your DD with their tit? I'm sure they meant nothing by it, especially what with you being there.

JeffsanArsehole · 22/09/2015 12:37

I don't believe in communal nudity, way too much opportunity for abuse

I really don't want a bloke looking at me while taking his time 'drying' his cock secretly rubbing it

OnlyLovers · 22/09/2015 12:38

I do wonder if all this "strutting" people talk about is in the eye or overeheated imagination of the beholder. Certainly I've never noticed any, just naked people walking around.

Totally agree.

And this: I don't believe in communal nudity, way too much opportunity for abuse is just bonkers.

Garrick · 22/09/2015 12:41

A gym near where I used to live had naked swimming one evening a week. I went swimming every night in those days so I thought, meh, why not. Costumes were optional so I wore one.

Turned out all the women had their swimmies on, and were swimming. The naked individuals were all men, either sitting on the side or floating off the rails, with their legs well spread out. Odd! I tried not to laugh

NerrSnerr · 22/09/2015 12:44

Who is being abused in a communal changing room? I assume children are with adults getting changed? I use the gym all the time and people tend to just get on with getting changed. To be honest if you have an issue with naked people then communal changing rooms are probably not for you.

ToadsJustFellFromTheSky · 22/09/2015 12:44

I've never understood this whole "strutting" business either. I always walk around naked in the changing rooms after showering when I've been swimming. I always get dried and dressed as fast as I can but I'm sure there are people who will still think I'm "strutting".

peggyundercrackers · 22/09/2015 12:45

it was swinging? what size was it? conjures up images of it swinging like an elephants trunk. unless the other person was gifted then I think your making a mountain out of a mole hill.

JeffsanArsehole · 22/09/2015 12:46

Yes, I think there's a fine line between being 'ok with nudity' and 'getting a stiffie and a sexual thrill/flashing cos I'm a weirdo' from it.

That's what I mean by 'abuse'. I don't want to be flashed at, no different in a communal changing room than outdoors at the park.

Spartans · 22/09/2015 12:46

someone momentarily touched your DD with their tit? I'm sure they meant nothing by it, especially what with you being there.

Where did I suggest she meant anything by it? Neither dd or myself felt she had been assaulted.

Is it really so difficult to keep your tits under control or just ask someone to get by?

People can do what they want and I certainly have no problem with people being nude in general. However personal space should be respected.

IceBeing · 22/09/2015 12:50

The 'strutting' comment reminds me of the ostentatious BFing meme.

For that reason I think the OP is BU.

If someone is invading your space then by all means ask them to stop. But I don't think you are 'parading' just because you are naked any more than you are ostentatiously getting your boobs out for BF purposes.

batshitlady · 22/09/2015 12:54

I agree OnlyLovers. I've been changing in Gyms for about 30 years now and I've never had bits dangled, or hairy orifice poked in my face ~ thankfully. Maybe it's me though?

Perhaps I naively don't perceive those that aren't afraid of their own nudity/body to not feel the need to cover up, as arrogant strutters about?

As for the mixed nude swimming thing? Well yes perhaps men are much quicker to 'rip off' than women, I don't know, but the choice was there no? Don't go and then complain there were nude men there. BTW where is this pool so I can... er... avoid it?

MerryMarigold · 22/09/2015 12:55

I always walk around naked in the changing rooms after showering when I've been swimming. I always get dried and dressed as fast as I can but I'm sure there are people who will still think I'm "strutting".

So, what walking exactly do you need to do in between drying and putting on your clothes. Oh, let me just brush my hair in front of the mirror. Oh no, I appear to have my moisturiser in a completely different place from the rest of my stuff so I need to go and find. Oooh, maybe I need the loo, and it's probably best to go there naked. .

weaseleyes · 22/09/2015 12:56

When I used to go to the gym, most people certainly weren't strutting, but were just wandering around getting on with stuff with slightly varying degrees of self-consciousness. I only ever saw two people that could be classed as strutters, and they certainly stood out.

One woman seemed to do everything with her legs as far apart as possible. (I think I'll dry my toes. Oh, I'll just put one of my legs right up here on the counter to do it.) She just seemed utterly determined not to be embarrassed and rather over-compensated. The other was absolutely gorgeous looking and seemed to want to show it off a lot. She left putting on her clothes till the last minute. She would even do her make-up and dry her hair naked, whilst we all tried not to look at her perfect form with envy. Sometimes she was so last minute in her dressing I'd begin to feel an irrational anxiety she was going to walk out into the lobby naked.

Ta1kinPeace · 22/09/2015 12:57

Very occasionally we get "strutters" at my gym
does one really have to inspect one's bum crack in the full length mirror?
But generally people get on with getting changed.

I always put my pants on quickly, but that is because my stretch marks look shite more than anything else.

Apparently there are lots of TV watching bum scratchers in the Men's

Thefitfatty · 22/09/2015 12:58

I'd probably strut if I could...I'm usually pretty sweaty after the gym, even with a shower, I'd love to just walk around in the buff till my body temperature returns to normal and I can get dressed without getting my clothes sweaty.

Guess I'm an exhibitionist.

batshitlady · 22/09/2015 12:59

So what if she does? You're in a bloody changing room FGS. Nudeness is likely. Or is it someone else's problem that you're offended by a naked human body?

OnlyLovers · 22/09/2015 13:01

So, what walking exactly do you need to do in between drying and putting on your clothes

Oh do sod off. Like someone says above, it's hot and uncomfortable putting clothes on straight after the gym and a shower. I tend to put knickers on and sit on the changing bench for a minute while packing my bag and cooling down. On occasion I get up and go across to my locker for something, or to put something in the bin. Perhaps I inadvertently strut/parade/flash people as I go?

Grow up, the lot of you.

AnyFucker · 22/09/2015 13:01

Women do it too

^^ you won't see me saying that very often

batshitlady · 22/09/2015 13:02

Exactly, I like to take 10 minutes before I dress in order to cool down. So if I get up to pee or brush my hair, I'm strutting?

ToadsJustFellFromTheSky · 22/09/2015 13:02

From the shower to the lockers. About a ten second walk away.

I then get dried and dressed as quickly as I can. I don't dry and brush my hair until after I'm fully dressed. I also don't moisturise after showering when I've been swimming, I do that at home later. If I need the toilet I will wait until after I'm dressed.

I would say I'm naked in view of people for about 2-3 minutes, if that. And that's assuming there's even anyone in there as I tend to go swimming during quiet times so there are times when I'm the only one in the changing room and nobody even sees me during those 2-3 minutes tops that I'm naked.

If you want to call what I do "strutting" then fair enough.

ToadsJustFellFromTheSky · 22/09/2015 13:05

I also keep all my clothes and everything I need together in one place so I don't have to go wandering off in search of things whilst I'm naked. I get everything sorted before I take my clothes off to shower so they're all there when I finish.

So really when I say I walk around naked in the changing room I only really mean the ten second walk between the showers and the lockers.

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