to be fed up of being challenged for parking in a disabled space?

[hedgehogsdontbite]

People think they're doing the righteous thing when they appoint themselves to the parking police but do they ever think about the impact they're having on the other person?

I was challenged yet again yesterday. The woman watched me park then stood in the space behind my car staring at me the whole time while I got out. Then snaps 'these spaces are for disabled people' as I walk past her.

Thing is, I have a blue badge which was out on my dashboard which shewouls have seen if she wasn't behind my car. But why do I even need to justify myself to some random in a supermarket carpark? I feel so intimidated by this kind of thing that I couldn't cope being in the shop so left. So now I need to go today instead, if I can get past the anxiety it's created.

AIBU to think 'just leave me the fuck alone'?

Sorry fairy thought you were just moaning about fines for those types of badge misuse being unfair.

Perhaps they ought to have different codes and write up the statistics differently- ie badge displayed incorrectly (but being used by the correct person in a way that they are entitled to use it) vs parking incorrectly (overstaying or somewhere where they shouldn't be parked) vs badge being used incorrectly (fraud).

A young friend of mine used to get a lot of abuse when using her blue badge. She was terminally ill, despite looking the picture of health. I recall one woman stomping up to her to have a go, then she saw me, much older, getting out of the passenger side, using my walking stick, said 'oh' and walked off. I was nowhere near disabled back then - I just fitted her perceptions of disability.
Update - form half filled in - back for another go next week!

Civic duty would be a very good reason to get involved with charities helping disabled people. May I suggest Guide Dogs? They are looking for volunteers to help blind/visually impaired people who don't yet have guide dogs by guiding them to places they need to go. I think it's called the My Guide scheme. Very worthwhile, and much more useful than accosting disabled people in car parks.

Oh, shove your 'civic duty' where the sun doesn't shine. Have you even read the thread?

Yep - read the thread. Just trying to explain why some people check thee parking - ie to protect the valauble blue badge scheme. I guess some people get more worked about this than others. My blue badged 'sprightly' mother - and my terminally ill friend - don't - but clearly other posters do.

And Of course Idon't accost people parking - but, yes, people have queried my mother's and friend's entitlement to park in the space, and as previously said, it doesn't bother them and they 'get' why others are querying this

When I am getting my son in or out of the car, the last thing I need is some ignorant fool getting in the way and making my son more likely to become distressed.

One of the greatest difficulties involved in parenting dcs with disability is protecting and nurturing their self esteem in a society that sees them as non people.

Challenging parking face to face is just one example. If someone wants to know if that car has a right to park in a disabled space they can check the dash for a bb - confrontation is unecessary, rude and damaging - it should not be acceptable to anyone. Mind your own business and let people go about theirs with respect and dignity.

A friend of mine who has a Blue Badge told me recently that he had challenged someone for parking in a space without a Blue Badge. It isn't just able bodied people who do it. He wants to protect the spaces for other disabled people. He got a mouthful of abuse for his trouble. I did point out to him that the person could have been disabled but he said if he was he should have produced his Blue Badge there and then.
My 89 year old DM displays DF's Blue Badge in her car whether he is with her or not .

Larry, my relative does the same. It isn't to park in a disabled space, it is to avoid paying parking charges. I have challenged him, he just laughed at me.

I have a blue badge, not only do I challenge the selfish entitled people who park in a blue badge space who don't have one, I now have stickers I put on any cars behaving like that if there is no driver around to challenge - easy peel so they can't try the criminal damage angle. I get amazing abuse - two categories of people - 'naice' well coiffured, well dressed middle aged women and younger men in expensive cars. From now on however I am going to use the ' excuse me you've forgotten to put up your blue badge'. Love it! As for badge holders allowing other people to misuse their badges and the people who do that, I hope they get caught, I hope they are fined the maximum of £1000 and I hope the blue badge is taken away. If I knew of that behaviour I would tell them that I am going to report unless they stop.

I understand your frustration. I have an 8yo and I'm challenged for using parent and child spaces. Often told they are for babies and toddlers! He has SN/SEN and really needs the safety and space around those spaces. He has limited sense of risk, very distracted etc etc we don't have a blue badge. He doesn't qualify even though he receives lower rate mobility payments. Rightly so imo. He can walk, just not safely.

non visible disabilities cause all kinds Of problems. I have a bowel complaint (chronic, incurable, non life threatening) and often cannot wait in the usual long loo queue because I cannot control it and often have to use the disabled loos or I end up having an accident much to others complaints and tutting. Same when out with my DS he needs supervision, at 8 he is 'too old' to use the ladies loos and other women complain he is in there even though the cubicles are floor to ceilings so the only option is the unisex disabled.

We cannot win. Whichever way we do it someone will always find a reason to moan.

The op was challenged when she did have a blue badge out.

Ds is 9. We use p+c and bb spaces (he has a bb due to asd and severe learning difficulties). I also use the ladies loos with him if there is no disabled loo around. We get the staring and tutting wherever he goes so I think I'm starting to become immune to it.

Bourdic DF has no idea DM uses his badge. They keep it in the car and obviously sometimes she goes out withouthim. He is 98, nearly blind and can barely walk across a room so he is oblivious. However when I meet up with her tomorrow I will mention the £1000 fine.

Yes I am sure the disabled relative I have also has no idea her Husband uses the BB when she is not in the car. She would not approve, but is really to ill for me to worry her about this. I have spoken to him, he laughed, the idiot.

The fine is bad enough u would losing the blue badge matter? That is the real sanction. I can appreciate relatives not knowing of the unlawful use but that makes the behaviour of the able bodied person using it all the more reprehensible. I have sometimes had to come home without beng able to park and have felt very tearful about it- maybe one of the spaces was being used by someone like the examples above. Not a victimless 'crime'

Aridane THIS!!!

"Mind your own business and let people go about theirs with respect and dignity."

As I mentioned upthread they might not just be experiencing mobility issues but pain, anxiety, fear... So yea BUTT OUT!

As to the abuse by able bodied relatives - despicable - I argued with a friend over this and would (and told her) I'd have no qualms about reporting if they didn't stop.