to be fed up of being challenged for parking in a disabled space?

[hedgehogsdontbite]

People think they're doing the righteous thing when they appoint themselves to the parking police but do they ever think about the impact they're having on the other person?

I was challenged yet again yesterday. The woman watched me park then stood in the space behind my car staring at me the whole time while I got out. Then snaps 'these spaces are for disabled people' as I walk past her.

Thing is, I have a blue badge which was out on my dashboard which shewouls have seen if she wasn't behind my car. But why do I even need to justify myself to some random in a supermarket carpark? I feel so intimidated by this kind of thing that I couldn't cope being in the shop so left. So now I need to go today instead, if I can get past the anxiety it's created.

AIBU to think 'just leave me the fuck alone'?

I just cannot BELIEVE that people will challenge those parking in disabled spaces. (I'm not doubting the OP's word for a second, I am just shocked that people would do such a thing!)

It has never even crossed my mind that people might be using those spaces 'fraudulently'. If I see someone apparently able-bodied getting out of a disabled parking space, I just assume they have a disability that I cannot see that nonetheless inhibits them from walking across the car park. Because walking across the car park isn't exactly difficult for the rest of us, is it? Able-bodied people run marathons all over the place, and those of us who are too fat and unfit to do so NEED the exercise! So why on earth would I behave like an irrationally jealous person towards someone exercising a benefit that means absolutely nothing to me?

Even if I were that irrational person, I think I would stop before actually accosting someone and question whether I was, in fact, the right person to be policing this.

Jesus, what is WRONG with people?!

Judging from a lot of posters on this thread it is acceptable to bully those less fortunate in our society right now, this needs to be addressed and I am willing to bet that if a thread was set up asking how many blue badge holders have been accosted the answer would be most. It needs changed.

I'm just off to an appointment with someone at the community hub who is going to help me fill in the application for for a blue badge for me, as suggested by an occupational therapist. I can walk a bit, but in pain every step. Wish me luck!

Hedgehog - I have looked again at the figures in my area. You are right, they are not all prosecutions. The prosecutions in court were small. The 300 is for penalty notices and having cars towed away were a Blue Badge was misused.

The criteria for a Blue Badge varies a lot in different areas. My DF has a Blue Badge as where he lives, it is much easier to get one. My DM who is actually much more disabled than my DF, is not entitled to one where she lives. She does not get top rate mobility DLA, the criteria for a Blue Badge were she lives. It does make it a postcode lottery though.

I'd even take the figures for misuse with a bucket load of salt. I know of people locally who were using them in ways any rational person would call legitimate, but nevertheless had fines. Eg cos bb was upside down.

They give details about categories of misuse. They include relatives who are able bodied using the badge for their own use only. But the most common misuse was out of date badges. Now this might be an oversight, or it might be someone using a badge they are no longer entitled to.

I do know relatives who commonly misuse a BB when their disabled relative is not with them, to save money on parking fees. Parking fees are expensive where I live, and the people on question don't have much money. Their rational is as they are not parking in a disabled space, it is a victimless crime.

However my biggest concern is that the criteria for a BB in some places is now so tough, that many people who do really need one, can no longer get one.

The problem is people think they can see when someone is disabled and if they can't then they assume they are fine.

I can't get a blue badge for DS as much as he needs one but have been challenged many times on using the disabled toilet with him, even when he is in his special needs buggy.

My friend was fined for "misuse" because she displayed her badge with the wrong side facing up.

FIL was fined because he forgot to put his clock up.

Both are legitimate BB users.

Yes I need to use the disabled toilet in some places, because I can't get upstairs without lots of help. I don't actually need an accessible toilet, but in lots of places toilets are located up lots of steps that I just can't manage. I have had dirty looks.
I have also parked in P&T spaces in supermarkets if there are no close spaces, as I am not entitled to a BB, but can't walk very far. I have also been challenged by parents who think I am just being lazy. I just ignore them.

Yes I have been told that DS is too old for me to be using p and c spaces too. He is only 5 so can only see that getting worse in the next few years!

fairy I can see why they would be issued with fines though- if the badge is the wrong way up presumably the details (expiry date etc) can't be checked so it could be misuse. And with the clock, the badge entitles you to park on yellow lines for 3 hours so without the clock you might be overstaying.

If it was up to me, on appeal I would let your friend off once the details had been checked, and your FIL if he could prove he hadn't overstayed. But that's just me.

Don't really get the angst - just say you have a blue badge and move on.

But why should people have to justify themselves?

I've been fined 5 times for misuse of my blue badge.

1 for not displaying a clock. They're not used in my home country so I didn't know it was needed until I got fined.

3 times for using an invalid badge. My badge was issued by another EU state and is valid but some parking wardens don't seem to understand that. On one occasion I caught up with the guy who said he'd checked with the council and they said it wasn't valid. The woman at the council was livid at this as she was very clear to him that it was valid.

Nobody has been able to identify why the last one was issued. It was eventually cancelled as were all the other 4.

Really Ariadne? How would you feel if you were regularly asked by random passers by why you had parked in a particular space in the car park? Can you honestly say you wouldn't find it annoying?

I agree Chronically. The point I was trying to make was that misuse isn't always someone using the badge fraudulently, it is very often penalising a simple mistake like the ones I mentioned.

For me the issue isn't that it's annoying, although it is. The issue is that it's frightening. I am vulnerable and alone. People don't confront strangers unless they're in 'fight' mode and their adrenaline is up. Previous experience experience of being attacked and abused by confronters tells me I am in very real danger.

Aridane
Don't really get the angst - just say you have a blue badge and move on.

Because some self-entitled twats feel they are justified in asking exactly why someone has a blue badge, they certainly would ask for more info.

My Dad has one, and Mum is now applying for one (and should get it).

As I sometimes drive Dad about, I've come across the people who feel they are judge and jury on who deserves a badge. Dad has now got used to me swearing at the odd one or two really obnoxiously gits, there's no way I'm putting up with people upsetting my parents when they don't deserve it.

No, PD, I wouldn't find it annoying. I would just assume people were doing that they perceived to be their civic duty and checking a valuable blue badge space wasn't being misused. Sort of a bit like at work where we are all encouraged - even though we are not security guards - to gently challenge 'visitors' / others without security passes.

It makes my Mum's day when she uses her blue badge to park and she is asked whether she should be parking there. Though the poor member of the public then has difficulty getting away from my v chatty mother...

Ah, Rasberry - now that would be really annoying - totally get that!!!!

I don't think those asking are interested in whether someone has a blue badge. They want to have a go at those people they think shouldn't have one.

And the people I have had accuse me (in a very aggressive manner) of taking up a valuable blue badge space which they wanted to use have clearly not been just checking that the badge isn't being misused, they are just nosey ignorant fuckers who don't believe that a young person can have a severe disability and like to go around looking for arguments.

Aridane 'civic duty' ??

As several posters have said the people that do this are rarely so conscientious, tend to be aggressive and lacking compassion and are mostly unwilling to accept there are lots of conditions that can affect mobility that are rarely visible. Also as the OP herself has said its not that it's just 'annoying' it can be intimidating and frightening. If your mobility is compromised anyway you feel especially vulnerable being confronted by someone while as several posters have said the disabled person is usually alone. Add to which they may be in pain, needing to get to a seat/loo etc.

If you're genuinely concerned a bb is being misused then query it with a traffic warden/local authority with the reg details to hand.

Again as several pp have said though, often those challenging are narrow minded judgemental idiots who think only the elderly/someone using a traditional mobility aid is entitled to one!

But civic duty wouldn't be accepted as a valid reason for me to question none bb holders in car parks as to whether they have insurance/ tax/ mot/ licence. Or quiz people loading their shopping as to whether they've paid in full. Or ask a tradesman in a car park if he's fiddling the books.