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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to report family member for benefit fraud?

237 replies

YUDOTHIS · 06/08/2015 08:18

I have a family member who openly (to family) commits benefit fraud. she has one child, who is between 1 and 2 (trying not to out self here). She claims income support and child benefit, housing benefit etc as a single mother, however her partner lives with her (but "legally" lives with and pays tax etc from his mums house) I know that including benefits they have an income of 5k every month. I can't say which is benefits and which is her partners income as i've never asked but I know benefits are low and probably wouldn't top 1.5k max a month including housing benefit.
It really does bother me, as she is quite happy to rub it in my face, she is college qualified and has applied for jobs over the last 7-8 months or so, but has turned down 9 jobs because "I want to be able to afford my monthly boohoo shop and until I can do that in a job I'm staying on benefits" it really does irk me as I know she does not need this income and its wrong while thousands are being sanctioned every week and not having money to live on and she's laughing all the way, I've had to claim benefits myself and I feel people like her just keep the stigma going! I really really want to report but I don't know how many people she has told and if she has only told immediate family I worry it'll kick up a massive stink, I can't lie to save my life either!
WIBU to report her for fraud?

OP posts:
wafflyversatile · 06/08/2015 18:24

What law has he broken?

AlexisL · 06/08/2015 18:26

Omg i so get where you're coming from, this is my sister (who I now have no contact with!) She "separated" from her partner years ago, she now has a 4 bed council house for her and her 4 children. He officially lives round the corner at his father's house ie has bills sent there, is registered for council tax etc but he still lives with my sister.

She knows that whilst he's officially registered elsewhere they can't touch her, ie tax credits, housing benefit etc and so she had her "ex's" wage of about 3k per month? and around 2k in benefits. Yet me and my dh are BOTH working our backsides off and bring home nowhere near that, she repulses me, hence why we haven't spoken in nearly two years, although our family turn a blind eye to what she's doing.

Bubblesinthesummer · 06/08/2015 18:28

A lone parent with a child under 5 years old is not obliged to look for work. Therefore she can turn down as many jobs as she likes

From what I understand she isn't a line parent. Her partner that lives with them is the childs father and they have been together for 7 years

Theycallmemellowjello · 06/08/2015 18:40

I personally couldn't bring myself to report a family member. You should at least give her a chance to make it right herself before reporting her.

AlexisL · 06/08/2015 18:51

I too couldn't bring myself to report my sister, she is family after all but I knew I had to do something. I couldn't stand having to listen to how she was buying this and that, what exotic holiday she was going to book next etc etc so I decided there and then to cut her out of my life, our parents don't like it and will defend her to the hills but I know what she is and what she has done so I do not care.

Downtheroadfirstonleft · 06/08/2015 18:52

Report her.

Hopefully she will be investigated. If she hasn't done anything wrong, she won't lose out. If she has, she deserves all she gets.

crustsaway · 06/08/2015 18:53

Mind you're own business. Jealousy will not pay off in the end.

Downtheroadfirstonleft · 06/08/2015 18:56

Add message | Report | Message poster Loafliner Thu 06-Aug-15 16:26:50
I wouldn't report a family member for something like this. I might however say something to her though, at least to stop talking about it.

Yes, because crime is fine if you happen to be related to the perpetrator...

NewLife4Me · 06/08/2015 19:03

I couldn't report my sister.
Although somebody did report her when she was suffering from emotional and physical abuse.
Her husband was forcing her to sign papers that were fraudulent.
She was put away for a year/ should have been 18 months and her newborn was in SCBU and she was unable to see her.
How could you even contemplate reporting your own sister.
You should be ashamed of yourself, and very likely she will be found out anyway.
If you report you should at least have the guts to tell her, but s'pose you'd be too chicken.

MissWimpyDimple · 06/08/2015 19:05

I have RTFT but I reported someone who I knew absolutely definitely was fraudulently claiming (I don't want to out myself, but I know as she has told me, plus I happen to work for an organisation involved in the process).

The upshot is that NOTHING happened.

They did suspend benefits for a short time but reinstated. Basically she has been claiming for 8 years as single but he has lived there as her partner (share bed, father of all three children etc) and they have got away with it.

So go ahead and report her, but don't expect anything to come of it.

LazyLohan · 06/08/2015 19:20

Well done OP. The benefit system depends on people who have a decent income paying in to support those who need help. Because the money she's claiming cancels out the tax her OH pays it is an elaborate form of tax evasion. Yet for an awful lot of MN posters the instant anybody claims a benefit they instantly become unquestionably noble and deserving.

If you were to post saying that somebody you knew was denying the state of exactly the same amount of money in a tax scam, exactly the same people would be telling you to report. But as soon as a benefit claimant is involved it's fine.

LazyLohan · 06/08/2015 19:21

Wimpy, I actually know someone who is being prosecuted for doing this right now, so it's not always ignored.

Original poster
YUDOTHIS · 06/08/2015 19:27

No idea why I'm getting the "You should be ashamed reporting your sister!" comments....

  1. I haven't disclosed the family relation,
  2. ashamed of myself for what exactly? reporting up to 18k of fraudulent income? Okay then... I consider myself totally and utterly ashamed not
OP posts:
AlexisL · 06/08/2015 19:31

What, are you completely stupid? I didn't "contemplate" reporting my sister, not for a second! But that doesn't mean I agree with what she is doing, nor does it mean I should have to put up with her bragging about how much money she has hence the cutting her out of my life!

HermioneWeasley · 06/08/2015 19:34

Why should she be ashamed to report someone, even if that person is a relation? What the relative is doing is wrong. Just because companies exploit a legal but reprehensible ability to avoid tax doesn't mean that benefit fraud isn't objectively, legally and morally wrong.

Spartans · 06/08/2015 19:34

Thanks Spartans. That 2 year old article has opened my eyes that someone can pay tax and national insurance though they don't have right to stay.

I have to say though, that talking to you has rather been like having a battle of wits against the unarmed.

Oh bless you. Need to resort to vague insults?

Doesn't matter how old the article is, proves that another one of your hilarious put downs, was factually incorrect. And quite hypocritical.

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 06/08/2015 19:36

YUDO. Take no notice.
You see with things like this. You ask advice and people are quick to say. Oh yes report and as soon as you do you're roasted a pitch fork.
Unfortunately You can't win in this world

Spartans · 06/08/2015 19:38

Op, you get this reaction from some on mn, who don't think benefit fraud exists and even where it does.....it's not that bad.

It's quite bizarre sometimes. Especially when they haven't read the thread, or read it and add their own bits in....like making her your sister.

You have nothing to be ashamed of

Loafliner · 06/08/2015 19:40

Downtheroad people commit crimes all the time, they speed and drive while under the influence, ...these crimes risk life which is much more vauable than benefits - do people on this tread get as excited about reporting a speeding offence?

Original poster
YUDOTHIS · 06/08/2015 19:45

Jealous of what exactly? will anyone care to share?

OP posts:
Babyroobs · 06/08/2015 19:47

I know quite a few people who claim to be lone parents whilst having their partner 'living at his mams' round the corner. Of course it exists. Too many greedy people around.

Anniesaunt · 06/08/2015 19:49

OP and others who have reported I think you did the right thing.

loaf I reported a drunk driver just this week.

FirstWeTakeManhattan · 06/08/2015 19:50

Well, job done then OP.

You say that talking to her wouldn't have worked. I still think you should have warned her what you were going to do and given her the chance to do the right thing.

You could still have reported her if she didn't do anything to change. You didn't really have anything to lose by giving her the chance.

NoArmaniNoPunani · 06/08/2015 19:51

Are you certain of your facts OP? I can't imagine someone with a 5k monthly income shopping at boohoo.

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 06/08/2015 19:55

It's likely there's no personal risk to the fiancée. He's not a claimant, so wouldn't have to repay the money or be prosecuted.

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