Can i just check that ainbu

[Balacqua]

A family member has broken something valuable of another ones.

Of course the person who broke it should either sort it out getting fixed, pronto, or go without to come up with the cash to replace it? Right? No matter how expensive it was? No excuses?

Feel like I'm slightly losing my marbles here!

I didn't say the op did. That paragraph was about pp whoe 'would be proud they raised a lefty'

Why is mummy paying for his big trip anyway?

spartans Ok - that makes sense!

turningviolet I am assuming an 18yo is probably still at school or has just left school and has little money. Why wouldn't/shouldn't a parent pay for a holiday for their child? This attitude baffles me on MN.

My Ds is 18 and has just finished his A levels. He just came back from Magaluf (proud emoticon) yesterday. Which he fully funded himself (through his part time job).
Op's Ds is old enough to be playing politics but needs his mummy to pay for his holiday?

turningviolet You know as well as i do that not all 17/18 yo have jobs while at school. And even if he does - why shouldn't his mum pay for a holiday for him anyway. I paid for my DD2 to come on holiday with us even though she was 22 at the time and in a full time job. Sometimes parents just like to treat their kids.

Anyhoo - i should think OP isn't going to be paying for much more for her DS given his decanter rage.

Lots of parents pay for their 17/18 year olds to go on holiday. I can't see a problem with that at all.

OP, I presume he spent ages on his hands and knees picking up every last shard of glass?
I'd tell him he needs to pay 400 for a new decanter. How he finds that money is up to him.
He sounds precocious.

"That's not a fucking apology. How much you like it has nothing to do it, the point is don't break other people's things. Demonstrate your contempt for material possessions by getting rid of your own, by all means."

^ This.

The son sounds like an entitled wanker.

I did want the item to be a Star Wars collectable though. :(

Someone can have all the principles in the world while mummy and daddy are paying for everything they want.

Was there wine in it???

I'm thinking anyone who owns a £650 decanter doesn't drink cheap plonk ????

This is absolutely fucking classic.

Fie upon your middle class petit bourgeois materialism! You have ruined this world for future generations!
[lobs expensive item, although obv not one belonging to him]
Can I have £500 for a holiday?
Mum?
...Mum?
...... no?
Really?
See, it's not a petit bourgeois holiday. It's on a spray-painted bus. We are having An Experience. I just need some money to pay for it. I didn't design the system; when Russell Brand is ruler, we'll smash the capitalist stronghold and barter for everything in shells and hugs.
But right now I just need that £500.
Still no?
Um. So.
[thoughtful pause]
That hideous fucking decanter. I'm sorry about that. Sort of.
[kiss on cheek]

ladylike BIG [GRIN!]

[GRIN]! even...!

Take caps lock off.....!

lastlike has it spot on.

He pissed off with the older generation screwing his, fed up with materialism bit wants mummy to pay for his holiday. It's completely ridiculous.

At 18, if he really wanted to go he should be finding it himself rather than relying on the older generation to pay

Keep the £500!! There are so many levels on which that behaviour shouldn't be rewarded. I certainly wouldn't be paying for his holiday!

I am with Ladylike. My leftwing politics have clashed with those of my parents on occasion (I'm 50 now and haven't got a lot more rightwing as I've aged) BUT I was never been dim enough to bite the hand that feeds.

I'd laugh in his face if I were you. But I do wish you'd told us the whole story from the get go!

Sorry, random been in there!

Lady

I would keep the £500 to buy a new decanter, and let him sell his own possessions to raise the money for his holiday.

The apology was awful. He needs to understand destroying somebody else's treasured possessions, regardless of monetary value or whether they are to your taste, is really nasty behaviour.

I take back my support of your son. He's 18. On what fucking planet is it ok to break something to demonstrate a point?!

He reminds me of some student 'anarchists' in Cambridge who 'squatted' in a house owned by one of their daddies moaning about the capitalist system while doing Law and taking up a position in the city upon graduation. They all bemoaned the bourgeois trappings before going skiing at Christmas. Dickheads.

OP, I presume he spent ages on his hands and knees picking up every last shard of glass?

This too!!!

Is it the horn decanter? if so, it's ghastly!. Why have I never heard of Riedel, I love glass, some of it is great but not the horn decanter

I love it that my DCs are opinionated and have a lot to say for themselves but not when they break anything of mine! My DD threw my hairdryer across the room and broke it, she replaced it! I would stand firm. Hope you get it resolved OP.

So nobody has ever made a youthful mistake in the heat of the moment? He is 18 - there are mature 18 year olds & not so mature 18 year olds. I don't condone what he has done, far from it and there should be consequences.

personally I would be thinking along the lines of he still gets the money towards his trip, but has to get a job (if he doesn't already have one) and pay back every penny. Thereby teaching him the value of having something you really want (decanter/ holiday) and having to pay for it.

So nobody has ever made a youthful mistake in the heat of the moment?

No, I have never thrown a valuable object owned by another person in a fit of teenage angst. This is not normal behaviour.