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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Can i just check that ainbu

268 replies

Balacqua · 13/07/2015 20:56

A family member has broken something valuable of another ones.

Of course the person who broke it should either sort it out getting fixed, pronto, or go without to come up with the cash to replace it? Right? No matter how expensive it was? No excuses?

Feel like I'm slightly losing my marbles here!

OP posts:
Optimist1 · 13/07/2015 21:13

Still need to know whether the person who broke it was adult or if not, the age of the child!

gamerchick · 13/07/2015 21:13

Stop dripping man and just give what happened.

plutonimum · 13/07/2015 21:13

"A fit of pique"?! Stuff the breaker's holiday; s/he will have to control his/her temper better!

98percentchocolate · 13/07/2015 21:13

So... A teenager then. Please stop drip feeding and just say teenager.

FenellaFellorick · 13/07/2015 21:14

Assuming adult then bugger theit holiday. They shouldnt have been a twat.
Who breaks something of someone's on purpose?!
Assuming no drip feed of abuse or something terrible leading to incident.

CalebWomble · 13/07/2015 21:15

Surely it's easier to just give the full story than make people try to drag it out of you? No-one can say whether you are or aren't BU without the facts.

FenellaFellorick · 13/07/2015 21:15

Why don't you just explain what happened? Details are relevent when trying to assess a situation!

Lweji · 13/07/2015 21:15

FGS, just spill it out.

If living at home, they'd have to pay for it with money or work or all hell would break lose.

If not living at home, they should still have to pay for it, or be reported to the police (or the small claims court) for damages (google the proper legal terms).

If your partner, and doesn't pay, then dump.

Sloughcooker · 13/07/2015 21:15

It's kind of impossible to say whether it's U or not without getting the whole picture!

AIBU to punch someone in the head? YABU
AIBU to punch someone in the head because they were trying to stab my partner while setting fire to my house and running over my cat in my car that they'd just stolen? YANBU

chipshop · 13/07/2015 21:16

Could it be claimed on home insurance? Not many teens have £650 going spare. But yes context is all...

FenellaFellorick · 13/07/2015 21:16

So is it your teen who broke something and if you are to replace it, it means no holiday?

Bailey101 · 13/07/2015 21:17

If you want proper opinions just say what happened and stop being all mystic and drippy Confused

Purplepoodle · 13/07/2015 21:17

Could you gives us what happened. How old the person was that broke the thing, what relation they are.

If it's a teen and its a one off then I would expect them to make monthly repayments - chores if they don't have a pt job.

Original poster
Balacqua · 13/07/2015 21:19

Sorry for drip feed! Just don't want to give unnecessary detail to derail the essential facts. Yes teenager. Not usual behaviour. Now refusing to sort it out as does not understand why the object is valuable. Been having long circular argument and just needed a bit of focus from you wise mneters!

OP posts:
Original poster
Balacqua · 13/07/2015 21:20

'Mystic and drippy'! ????I'm called that in rl too!

OP posts:
Wideopenspace · 13/07/2015 21:20

Did the teenager break something whilst waiting for you to tell the actual story about something OP?

If so, my sympathies lie with the teenager...

Grin
Purplepoodle · 13/07/2015 21:21

They dont need to understand. They broke the item, it has a value (show them on eBay ect) tell them they will have to replace it. End of story. If they refuse then you take hard line and use holiday money

Original poster
Balacqua · 13/07/2015 21:22

Wide open - Grin again, something people tell me in rl!

OP posts:
FenellaFellorick · 13/07/2015 21:23

Your teenager?
They don't need to understand (more like accept! ) why it's valuable.
I mean, all they need would be a website showing replacement cost. It's not hard.
They just need to be told they ARE replacing it and this is what will happen.
You (they) don't get to smash someone's property and then tell them it's worthless.

As the adult, you tell them how this is going to work and they get to like it or lump it.

Notasinglefuckwasgiven · 13/07/2015 21:23

My name is how I felt by the time I got to the end of this Grin

namechange4this123 · 13/07/2015 21:23

they should offer to pay, and the offer should be refused

FunkyPeacock · 13/07/2015 21:23

Sorry still not enough info!!

If teen is to miss holiday to pay for broken item then who will he/she stay with while the rest of you are away? ( assuming you are the parent)

Can the teen have reasonably been expected to know the value of the item?

YoniMitchell · 13/07/2015 21:24

Does it matter that they refuse to see why the item was valuable? It was to the person who owned it, surely that's enough?

They need to repair or replace. And sick up the consequences of their pique.

YoniMitchell · 13/07/2015 21:24

Suck up, not sick up!

gamerchick · 13/07/2015 21:26

So your teenager has snapped all the poles needed to hold up your 600 quid tent for your holiday in a fit of rage and now there won't be no holiday unless they replace it?

Or something.