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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU not to pay her for a party she threw

408 replies

ahphoque · 06/07/2015 21:04

Last week I was visiting a friend and she had been invited to a party by a new friend of hers. I had previously met this friend but don't know her particularly well ikywim. Anyways, since my friend had only recently met this woman, she asked me to go as her plus one and so I went along with her. The party was quite dull and the woman throwing it was a bit off with my friend and rather rude towards me so we left after an hour or so.

We didn't have anything to eat (she had laid out crisps and the like) and brought a bottle of (rather expensive) wine each aswell as flowers.

This morning I received a text from party woman demanding £5 to cover the cost of the food she laid out. Now there were at least 60 people in attendance and there is no way she spent £300 on food.

AIBU to not pay her as I didn't eat any of the food and already gave her flowers and wine?

OP posts:
BitterChocolate · 08/07/2015 13:17

If this happened to me I would be absolutely consumed with curiosity and would have to contact every other party guest to see if they had been charged. Then I would need to find out why some were charged and others weren't. I'd probably need a questionnaire (I used to work in market research).

IceBeing · 08/07/2015 13:18

The thing about these threads is that in all likelihood noone else on here will ever have to respond to this situation...but we all feel so much happier knowing how MN would do it Grin.

CainInThePunting · 08/07/2015 13:20

OP
You are going to end up paying the loon aren't you?

Pfft.

MythicalKings · 08/07/2015 13:30
butterfly133 · 08/07/2015 13:35

oh no! I would have been the opposite, I wouldn't be able to avoid her and I'd be asking "WTF?"!!! No, seriously, I'd say "I got your text, I think there's been a misunderstanding".

Don't pay her whatever you do.

Appleblossom82 · 08/07/2015 13:42

Lol at op hiding behind a wall from crazy crisp woman Grin

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 08/07/2015 13:45

Oh no, I'd have done the same, hidden from the MadCrispWoman! I am shit at confrontations and I wouldn't have been able to pretend I didn't receive the text either. (also shit at dissimulation)

OnlyLovers · 08/07/2015 13:57

Oh, OP!

Actually I'd have hidden too. I hate face-to-face confrontation.

But reply to her.

LegoComplex · 08/07/2015 14:02

*stealth marking for later reading Grin

CainInThePunting · 08/07/2015 14:04

There is no need for pretending or hiding, I'd be going up to her as pleasant as you like, saying I'm so glad to see you as I wanted to talk to you about the text meesage you sent me were you still pissed?
Based on her reaction to seeing me, I would be explaining in the nicest way possible way that I had no intention of paying a fee after the event when it wasn't mentioned before or during.
So glad you realise you made a mistake in trying to fleece ME.
Anyway, must dash. See you soon menacingly.

Honestly OP, it's not normal.

Kewcumber · 08/07/2015 14:16

Could you not have lobbed a packet of crisps at her from behind the wall? Then you'd be all square.

KatieScarlettreregged · 08/07/2015 14:18

I'd have been up there like a shot, with the "oh good, I've been hoping to see you" line.
And once I'd convinced her of her worthlessness (no raised voices or swearing) I'd have tripped off gaily to continue my day.

Gruntfuttock · 08/07/2015 14:20

Me too KatieScarlettreregged. What a golden opportunity. I can't believe the OP hid!

LadyNym · 08/07/2015 14:27

Could you not have lobbed a packet of crisps at her from behind the wall? Then you'd be all square.

Grin

I think I'd have hidden too because I hate confrontation.

But I really do think I'd text with invoice for wine and flowers because how can you not. Please, please, please reply. You will be making so many people's day.

LegoComplex · 08/07/2015 14:43

reply op, REPLY!!

AdeleDazeem · 08/07/2015 14:48

Could you not have lobbed a packet of crisps at her from behind the wall? Then you'd be all square.

I've been laughing at this for the past four minutes Grin

The bag of crisps hits Crazy Crisp Lady smack on the cheek. She and her friend look around for the culprit. OP pops her head up, yells 'now we're quits!' and quickly scarpers off.

LastOneDancing · 08/07/2015 14:54

Ask her why you have been singled out for a 'charge'!

I need to know how she's justifying it to herself!

I think your actual friend is the weak link here. There was no +1, she just didnt want to turn up alone and she's covered it up by telling Crispy that you begged to be invited or some other shite.

steiner8 · 08/07/2015 15:18

Ha. Just reply and ask her to kindly pay your £5 for the wine and £5 for the flowers.

mellicauli · 08/07/2015 15:35

text back and say "Sure, I'll just deduct it off my appearance fee. The total is now £295. How do you want to pay?"

YouTheCat · 08/07/2015 16:03

Put some crushed up crisps in an envelope and put it through her letter box.

A crisp bomb! Grin

Fatmomma99 · 08/07/2015 16:20

Grin MythicalKings

Totally understood why you hid, though, OP. It's the difference between RL and sitting behind a screen, isn't it!

hhhhhhh · 08/07/2015 16:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HairyWorm · 08/07/2015 16:48

I'd probably have said hello and pretended like nothing had happened. If she asked I'd probably pull a suprised face 'oh, that wasn't a joke? You REALLY want me to give you £5 for coming to your party?'

Please text back something even if it's just for our entertainment!

LegoComplex · 08/07/2015 16:55

come on op, you've got us lot to back you up if needed cracks knuckles Grin

GraceGildee · 08/07/2015 17:07

Op, just text back WILLY WILLY WILLY or something equally daft.

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